Oomis, since you read the FJJ this week, perhaps you saw the letter to the editor signed by the 19 yr old girl in shidduchim. she articulated exactly what you said from the perspective of the girls who are expected to be the marriage partners of these boys.
SYAG: harbe shluchim lamakom. if the bas kol called out bas ploni liploni, it doesnt matter what this shadchan or that friend or neighbor thinks, says or does.