Even though I have agreed with most of what you say (until this more hurtful post), I disagree with your attitude towards APY’s bitachon. My husband and I have lived our lives according to what needs to be done to give our children a bayis neeman, even when it meant turning down jobs and living on nothing until the one best for my family came around. Somehow Hashem has filled in all the gaps. If there is a shadchan out there who is willing to work with “someone like me”, then great, but from your description it sounds like that would be asking too much. So I can’t forgo the shadchan, but I can’t ask them to look for someone appropriate for our child. That leaves me no place to look but Up. And not by my choice.
If you are a shadchan who will not set up singles unless they fit specific criteria and pay certain fees, who do YOU believe the rest of us should go to?