Syag: Have you ever been to a hotel?
Most people think that it’s all like those glossy ads in Mishpacha, with Pesach in Venice or on safari or what have you. Some are, some aren’t.
Do you know anyone who goes to a hotel, whether one of these or any other (and yes, there are others that are not like Versailles ignoring the poor of Paris, “let them eat sponge cake,” etc etc)? Happens to be, I do go to a hotel. I also clean and cook for Pesach every single year. (For full disclosure, I go with my father’s side of the family for two days of yom tov and chol hamoed and spend the other days of yom tov at home with my mother’s side.) As I experience both ends every single year, I can tell you that in my personal opinion, my yamim tovim at home are not inherently more spiritual in any way than are those at the hotel. At both I have had beautiful sedarim with various sides of the family. At both I have had amazing food- whether I made it myself or someone else did. At both I have experienced family meals and togetherness- and actually, as I’m sure you’ve realized over the years, all that the waiter service does is ensure that it’s more enjoyable. On Pesach the slaves were freed- there is no inyan that the women HAVE to be tied to the kitchen. There is nothing about the hotel experience inherently against anything that Pesach stands for- just against the image in people’s minds.
I have no problem with people who prefer the comforts of home- I can definitely see the appeal myself- but self-righteous condemnation of the way that someone else chooses to enjoy their yom tov is, IMHO, to quote your above phrase, “the wrong thing to do.”