whoops, not such good ones after all, (I’m not even trying with my ‘good ones’. They’ll never hit the big board. Previous experiences have taught me otherwise…) but enjoy these nontheless!
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon
> returning to her car,
> found four males in the act of leaving with her
> vehicle. She dropped her
> shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to
> scream at the top of her
> voice, “I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get
> out of the car!”
>
> The four men didn’t wait for a second invitation.
> They got out and ran like
> mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to
> load her shopping bags
> into the back of the car and got into driver’s seat.
> She was so shaken that
> she could not get her key into the ignition. She
> tried and tried, and then
> it dawned on her why.
>
> A few minutes later, she found her own car parked
> four or five spaces
> farther down. She loaded her bags into the car and
> drove to the police
> station. The sergeant to whom she told the story
> couldn’t stop laughing.
>
> He pointed to the other end of the counter, where
> four pale men were
> reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman
> described as white, less
> than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and
> carrying a large
> handgun. No charges were filed.
>
> If you’re going to have a Senior Moment, make it a
> memorable one!
>