As a proud grandmother visiting her family in Ramat Beit Shemesh I am sad to hear of people being taken aback by the tznius of others in the area. Many of us support, love and nuture families there. Believe me in the big bad world there are many obstacles we have to overcome, please fixtheworld do not worry too much about grandmothers who may not fulfill your own ideals of tznius. Yes tznius is very important, I have Rabbi Falk’s book right here!!! But minhagim play a role in how we dress and so does age!! Many sections of Rabbi Falk book are of especial relevance to Gateshead, what is acceptable there is not the same as Eretz Yisrael as Rabbi Falk himself recognises. He emphasises communities have their own minhagim. I often note the younger kids and mothers are dressed tzniusdik with tremendous care and attention, great. However as an older woman our teachings and customs tend to be different, look around at any simcha or big event where extended families get together!! Some wear denim, some do not, some use headscarves to cover their hair, others stick to sheitels, all to me are klal Yisrael and loved in their entirety. Tznius is a fascinating subject but of all the obstacles in life it is one that can be dealt with by focussing on oneself and not paying too much attention to those around who we can see are seeking in their own way to tznius. Sensitivity and respect go a long way!!!
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