It’s much more easy to relax and converse when you are in the passenger seat than when you are the one who has to drive 2 hours, meet the parents, find a place to eat, find parking, and be the perfect gentleman the whole way. “
True for the most part, but meeting the parents does not have to be a “do or die” proposition. I do not think that even one guy that my daughters have dated, could possibly say meeting my husband and me was an uncomfortable experience. They might have been nervous PRIOR, but surely not after, because we are a warm and friendly bunch at my house. No interrogations, no nuthin’. Just hello, nice to meet you, where are you going tonight, and have a great time.
The other aspects, driving around, finding where to go (and really, the guy should already have an idea of that BEFORE the date), and parking, can be stressors, but “being a perfect gentleman the whole way,” should be a no-brainer and a given. A fellow who does not know how to be a gentleman, needs to be taught good manners prior to being in shidduchim, if his parents have not already instilled them in him. My husband comes from very poshut, non-frum people, who had more menschlechkeit and good middos bein adam l’chaveiro in their little fingers than many FFB people (with or without a hat)that I have seen, have in their entire bodies.