Gavra@work
If the ‘chumra’ is in order to be part of a certain society then i guess its not a halachic, or spiritual question, it’s now a social issue. AND as far as social questions go acceptance IS the #1 concern.
So if your kids are at stake, no question go ahead and DO THE REQUIRED SOCIAL NORM. Put on the peyos, grow that beard, change the havara, make sure your gartel is thick enough and don’t chas veshalom be seen eating OU.