“just kidding- you don’t have to have me as a son-in-law (or should i say grandson-in-law?) if you don’t want to 😉 “
My daughters are too old for you, and mt granddaughter (11 months, kinehora) is way too young (and she has a boyfriend already anyway, the boy next door). But you are an intelligent, funny, and great guy, and someday when you are ready, you will a very lucky lady’s son-in-law.
Now, as to the point made by someone about whether or not to break off an engagement because you suddenly discover he IS a smoker… well, this would probably not be able to happen if in the Yeshivah world people dated in a normal fashion. If the boy and girl spent real time (quantity as well as quality) with each other on a VERY frequent basis, it would be obvious. Someone who is a smoker cannot keep from smoking for long periods of time with any regularity. The addiction and urge to smoke is so strong, they get antsy. Even if he excused himself to the bathroom to smoke, she would smell it on his clothing, hair, and breath. If a date lasted for many hours, there would be a sign that he had smoked at some point. And yes, the shidduch deserves to be broken, because I would forever wonder what else did he lie about by omission or commission? if you cannot trust your spouse, there is no basis for a marriage.I do not beleive in promises, because if the boy knew the girl is opposed to this habit, then he should have been kicking it as soon as he realized he wanted to see her a second time. Even if he did not get engaged to her, at least he might be on the road to getting away from the smoking permanently.