BS”D
WolfishMusings:
That is exactly the “Machlokes” between the shaddchan & the OP. Is one allowed to talk/date/get married outside the oversight of a shaddchan.
It seems to me that this is similar to the story with the storm, where after the person is nifter in the storm he complains to Hashem “But I Had Bitachon!”; and Hashem answers that I sent you a boat, helicopter, etc. but you didn’t take it.
The shidduch crisis is also a “storm”, and when Hashem sends someone (boy or girl) your way, you are best off taking His help.