You go to sleep after a long days work and you miss all the action…
She calls herself smartcookie….
“you’re not really looking for support…..
Sorry, I can’t do that. And I don’t think it’s right to make others do it….”
Where to begin? First and foremost what would you consider it when someone vents? That is a means of YOU providing support, by them unburdening them self they are sharing their load with YOU.
Lets move on to the self-righteous part shall we? thats what got my goat.
“We have our Torah which obligates us not to believe Loshon Hora.”
You seem concerned for the honor of our Torah and its laws, are you in fact familiar with them?
(I run a Machsom L’fi program so I *may* be more equipped to deal with this than you.)
The Chofetz Chaim says that if someone is unburdening themselves to you, you are NOT obligated to tell them to stop because a- you are providing support and b- it is possible by them telling you, they will unburden them self and not tell anyone else. However, you are unable to believe what you are being told, NOT THAT YOU SHOULD TELL THAT TO THEM (I added that last part as a common decency sort of thing)
Now lets move on to the obvious which is clearly not obvious to some. This is an anonymous forum! You do not know s2021 or her ex-husband so pray tell how that would categorize as Lashon Horah? She never mentioned a name and could be making the entire story up for all you know.
s2021
I cant say that I understand what you are going through because I don’t, but we can all try to sympathize the best we can. One thing I will say to you is that maybe it’s best to keep the most intimate details of your divorce to yourself. We all have bad days and go on emotional benders, but you don’t want to say something that will cheapen you.