The sensitivity is because you were brought up to think that it is the proper derech. If you were brought up hearing the name being used, you would not think twice about it.
no
i was brought up as a child to call all adults by their first name, my parents always used the first name of their spouse when referring to them, it was all very natural and correct to me.
when i was brought to the Torah by Hashem and began to develop a Torah sensitivity i started referring to my wife as “my wife” except to family and close friends.