So one time I went to my cousin’s kid’s bris in Jerusalem. My cousin’s neighbor (from the same landing in their building, 2 apts on each landing, who I naturally recognized because the kids are always back and forth and I was always around) was pulling a stroller up the staircase. So my other cousin and I offered to carry it for her.
She said no. And she was correct. We should not be friends.
It was appropriate for me to offer, and it was just as appropriate for her to refuse. We should not be accepting favors from one another. We should not be building positive feelings about one another; we should be strangers.