Let me preface my remarks by saying that, of course, I am not very familiar with the “shidduch” system. Even the frum people that I know found their mates on their own. So, what I have to say are simply opinions that I have made from reading this, and other threads in the CR.
OfCourse – you said:”Litvishe dont because the guys mothers generallly speaking (outside of Roshei Yeshiva families) want a girl who has completed her education and who brings in a nice salary. This is possibly part of the problem. They become desirable at 20/21 and old at 24/25.”
To me, it seems that 6 months or a year at a seminary, does not an education make. Yes, the girls get well educated in frumkeit and running a wonderful home. This does not make them good “job” material. They have no qualifications to obtain an extremely well paying job that can maintain a household, pay tuitions, etc. in order for their husbands to learn full time. The only way that they can become good earners is by getting some type of professional designation. Of course, to do that they must remain in school for a few more years which apparently puts them past the prime marriage age. It seems that this issue is like a hamster on a wheel – getting nowhere because you cannot please everyone. If it pleases a boy, his wife and family (who need to kick in with some support money), then why should anyone have any objections to how long the boy studies full time. The only problem that I see is the fact that they can study for years and years and in the end, they still aren’t qualified wage earners (for the most part). Again, the hamster on the wheel or a dog chasing his tail. That is all that I have to say for now. Please, feel free to criticize – I am sure many of you will, but this is my take on the subject – and on this topic, I really am an outsider looking in.