Byg, as I continue to read this, I realize more and more how serious this situation is. BH I ended up OK. I’m married, happy and healthy. I did however, and I never talk about this, go through a bit of a rebellious stage after high school, though it was short lived, and I can all but swear it was because I just needed to get away from home and lose it a little after all I had dealt with. Yes now my mother and I are close and she is very special to me, but I still have to pray every day that I am a different mother. No one should have that fear. One time when I was younger, no more than 9 or so, I did something ( probably nothing really) and my father literally had to hold my mom back she was trying to claw her way at me, screaming I hate you I’m going to kill you. It was one of the more terrifying instances. The next day was like nothing happened and I was too scared to show a SMIDGE of fear or remembrance of the day before that I also pretended nothing happened. Who knows why your mother is the way she is but she needs help ASAP. You should not be in an environment like this. I know you say you are more concerned with you than your future kids, but this sort of abuse, I promise you, leaves life long scars. What, if I may, if your parents marriage like?
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