Reply To: Getting the other to say no

Not disagreeing with him is also manipulation in terms of leading him on.

Say I and my friend are very good at the conversation part of dating and enjoy making people enjoy themselves, and this is a frequent result.

The purpose of dating is to see if they’re right for us, and if it’s obvious they’re not, we’re ‘damned if we do and damned if we don’t’. If we continue being our sweet easygoing selves, which is the way we are to those we like and we do behave that way at home too, the person thinks we want to date again and will be very disappointed when we say no. Again, this is the pure shidduch system and anything we do will be reported to at least 3 people.

We already discussed the other option.

I agree that it is unethical to manipulate someone purely for personal gain. But this gives him fuller freedom of choice, I am not limiting his choices in any way.

I apologize for my poor writing and expression recently, my brain is being overloaded in mathematics and my verbal skills are taking the blow.