October 25, 2017 10:06 pm at 10:06 pm #1389947
Have you applied for and gotten a job that they didn’t think was best for you?
For example, you’re quite introverted, and you’re working in a position that requires you to be the face of your company, attend all of the events, and just be out there connecting with people nonstop?
For example, you like to focus on certain tasks, and your job requires you to multitask 24/7?
I’m considering a job that requires those two points (outgoing 100% and required to do everything). I love love the organization and people working there. I love the cause. I know that I can help a lot, but I’m unsure how long I can do it and maintain my health. Even if I apply, I may not get the job. Still, I wouldn’t go for it if I wasn’t ready to take on the position.
Wondering if anyone else has been in this position… what did you do? how did that work out?
Thank you 🙂October 25, 2017 10:59 pm at 10:59 pm #1389968
People take jobs that are not their thing all the time.October 25, 2017 11:09 pm at 11:09 pm #1389990👑RebYidd23Participant
How badly do you need a job?October 25, 2017 11:29 pm at 11:29 pm #1390003
Joseph: So you mean I might never be a Professional Ice Cream Cake Tester? 🙁October 25, 2017 11:30 pm at 11:30 pm #1390002
VERY badly! Like yesterday, times infinity!October 25, 2017 11:48 pm at 11:48 pm #1390012👑RebYidd23Participant
And what are the alternatives?October 26, 2017 1:40 am at 1:40 am #1390021
Also, again, there’s no certainty that I’d be hired here. Hmmm…October 26, 2017 1:42 am at 1:42 am #1390026funnyboneParticipant
I would recommend that you take the job. You might find that you love the work.
You might find that the job isnt for you but the company might see how dedicated you are and might offer you a different position.
Good luck! Please let us know how things work out!October 26, 2017 7:40 pm at 7:40 pm #1390706
Thank you for your encouragement funnybone!
I will be applying for said job, and yes, I’ll keep you posted B”H 🙂October 31, 2017 11:32 pm at 11:32 pm #1392712
I am currently living in a small city where there are only very low level jobs which almost always require work on Shabbos as there are few if any FRUM Yidden here. Salaries here are very low, and are supplemented by forced overtime on Shabbos, which to locals (goyim) is an ordinary workday. I am in management, but cannot find a local job in such. I do not have the resources to be able to relocate AND my unemployment is almost over. When it is, I would be forced to go to a homeless shelter as I would have no income, and would be evicted for not paying rent. Needless to say, these shelters are in church related facilities, also Kosher food is totally unavailable here (except my own kitchen). What do I do…I am perplexed as I have no idea. I cannot work on Shabbos, but on the other hand, how would I survive as homeless with no available food. There is no Jewish community here to turn to for help. I only have a short time left until I will be out on the street here. I will loose all of my belongings here to the goyim, including sefforim. I know that I should relocate, but how, as I require assistance to do so. I feel that there is no future for me here as a frum Yid. I am aware of a few formerly frum Jews in the area who have dropped Yiddishkheit here, that is how they survive. Must I join them also? I hope not! Does anyone know of any help I can get from the Frum community to relocate to a much more suitable environment, before all is lost? I need help now! Do I have to apply for and take an unsuitable job in order to survive? Is it pekuach nefesh?October 31, 2017 11:54 pm at 11:54 pm #1392737
Is moving to Lakewood viable? A three bedroom basement in Lakewood proper could be had for no more than $1000/month. A smaller basement, with kitchen and all, for several hundred dollars less than that. And doubling or tripling up with some other frum guys sharing a basement would probably run you only a few hundred dollars a month.
Kosher food will be much less expensive too.November 1, 2017 1:11 am at 1:11 am #1392778
Update: Not applying for the job.
My boss showed me the current top candidate’s resume and application (at least, as of last Friday) and this person is exceptionally qualified! I heart the organization and want the best person for the position.. and I am not that person.
Truthfully though, seeing the background that it takes to be good in this job was really good for me because I can accept that it’s not my path.
I still need a job, like yesterday, B”H I’m pursuing other options.November 1, 2017 1:18 am at 1:18 am #1392792
out of town yid: As for living, because life where I was was sinply unaffordable and I could not even get a sustainable retail, hotel, or food service job (every job had billions vying for the opportunity and I was an inexperienced newcomer) I moved from the most magical amazing place that I had ever stepped foot on in my life to a boring suburb in a simple town with much more affordable food and housing.
When I first moved here, I told my new rabbi about my life. Suddenly he stopped me when I shared about a recent chesed that I had done. My rabbi told me that giving money away, for someone in my position, wasn’t chesed. A lot of pieces started coming together over the years. I seemed to care more about helping others and being a “good person” to a fault.
Moving to another state forced me to reevaluate my life goals, and take a new look at what I wanted from life.
You know what, I want to make money. I am still in the process of building myself up. I went back to school, and it was the most empowering things I have done for myself.
Baruch Hashem, my grades were great, and I finished my degree thanks to Pell grants and academic scholarships. Really a blessing.
Out of town yid, I do not know your circumstances, but I want you to know that you don’t have to give up who you are.
You might have to let go of your expectations as to what your purpose is in this world. Maybe Hashem needs you to move.
Honestly, that’s how I see it in my case.
No one. No one could have ever gotten me to move from where I was living.
But a turn of events slowly broke me down to the point that all I wanted was some privacy, a warm bed, and some quiet to reflect and stop fighting for survival.
Today, I feel at home where I am, and I appreciate having a more boring life.
It sounds like you need to act. Remember that you are not alone. Hashem is with you. Guiding you even now.November 1, 2017 7:32 am at 7:32 am #1392809
I would love to be able to relocate to Lakewood Ir Hakodesh…if only I could… As I stated above already, I totally lack the resources to go anywhere as I am almost completely destitute. Where can I at least get some sort of a loan to enable me to relocate? I would also need to be able to rent some place and have no funds to do so. I also need some sort of parnosa. How does one apply for a position long distance? My resume has my local address here where I currently am, I do not have a local Lakewood address. When I apply from here, to a job in local NYC area, I am ignored. I understand that in order to get a job somewhere, one must have a local address, but in order to get a local address, one needs a job. Is there any local Lakewood organization that could and would help me to relocate? Without outside aid, I am stuck here. Does anyone know where to turn for such help? Or, once again, do I have to take a position here, unsuitable of course, which would require me to have to work on Shabbos. That is at present my only outlet. One I really hope to be able to avoid.November 1, 2017 9:52 pm at 9:52 pm #1394068
OOTY: Moving to Lakewood beats becoming homeless in a hick town like the Yehupitsville you’re in. What resources do you need to move? If the alternative is becoming homeless simply take a bus to Lakewood with nothing more than the shirt on your back. Instead of paying rent where you are, use the remaining unemployment benefits you have to pay a couple hundred dollars for a shared apartment or a basement in Lakewood.
Then look for a job delivering newspapers or being a cashier in Lakewood.November 1, 2017 10:14 pm at 10:14 pm #1394072
Have you called 211 to connect with local resources and maybe nonprofits that can help you get to a better place?November 2, 2017 8:23 pm at 8:23 pm #1395142
OOTY: If you’re going to be homeless, better to go to Lakewood and be homeless there than in the goyish hick town you’re in. Once in Lakewood people will make sure you’re not homeless. You will be put up, if necessary.November 12, 2017 7:31 pm at 7:31 pm #1401836
BUMP – Can anyone think of ideas for OOTY?November 12, 2017 7:57 pm at 7:57 pm #1401841iacisrmmaParticipant
Lakewood is not “IHR HAKODESH”. That designation is strictly for YERUSHALAYIM. Lakewood has been called IHR HATORAH.November 12, 2017 7:57 pm at 7:57 pm #1401843
I offered OOTY several ideas.November 12, 2017 7:58 pm at 7:58 pm #1401840
OOTY: 1. I think you should take Joseph’s advice very seriously. I think he;s 100% right! If you’re homeless and unemployed anyhow, best to be homeless and unemployed in Lakewood! I’m sure that people will help you out there.
2. You mentioned somewhere that there is a local Chabad. Won’t they help you out?
3. There may be organizations in Lakewood that could help you out. I’ll see if I can get more information.
4. Isn’t there a website that one can try to raise money on? I think it’s been mentioned in the Coffee Room, and I’m sure that there are posters here who know what I’m talking about. That’s certainly preferable to Chilul Shabbos.
5. I’m not a poseik, but I’m 99.99% sure that according to halacha, you would not be allowed to take a job that involves Chilul Shabbos.
6. I have another idea, but I can’t post it right now.November 13, 2017 8:19 am at 8:19 am #1401981zahavasdadParticipant
Chabad does alot of great things, I see posts when there is an issue and the answer is “Call the local Chabad”.
As great as chabad are, they have limits. They do not have unlimited funds and many of the chabad houses are struggled and only suirvive because of alot of mesiras nefesh by the people who run it. And many of these chabad houses dont have any more local connections than most locals.November 13, 2017 10:58 am at 10:58 am #1402094ubiquitinParticipant
“And many of these chabad houses dont have any more local connections than most locals.”
Ah, so many do have connections! So it cant hurt to call. fantasticNovember 13, 2017 11:06 am at 11:06 am #1402109zahavasdadParticipant
I have been to the smaller town/Suburban Chabads where they barely get a Minyan (Not the richer Chabads like Las Vegas or some other place where there are either alot of jews or alot of tourists) I have always wondered how they surive. Many of them are just basically renting office space in an office park, not near anyoneNovember 13, 2017 11:47 am at 11:47 am #1402125ubiquitinParticipant
Nobody is suggesting that he assume the local shliach will support him forever.
chabad shluchim usually have connections (they always do if they are official shluchim sent by the Shluchim office his is how they survive, wonder no more!) and as you point out many might not have connections but many do. The fact that they may not get a minyan has nothing to do with the subject at hand. they are there to help yidden. This is not the common way they help, but most would be happy to try to connect someone in such an awful situation with someone who might be able top help.
It cant hurt to callNovember 14, 2017 6:36 pm at 6:36 pm #1403830
Ubiquitin – +1! That was my point – shkoyach!
I don’t know what resources they have, but I’m sure they will more than willing to try to find a way to help or give advice.
There has to be a solution for OOTY – it doesn’t make sense that in the year 2017 in the US, a Jew should feel that he has to be mechalel Shabbos to survive. And I’m sure anyone who he contacts will try to help or tell him who can contact for help.
“And many of these chabad houses dont have any more local connections than most locals.”
I’m sure that any Orthodox Jew or community would try to help him, but it sounds like Chabad is the only (or practically only) thing available where he lives. And they tend to have connections and know about resources.November 16, 2017 5:24 pm at 5:24 pm #1404989
“I offered OOTY several ideas.”
Joseph, I know, and I didn’t mean to imply otherwise. Your ideas were great, and they even got me thinking, and I gave him some more ideas, both here and elsewhere.
I was just concerned that judging by his initial response, he wasn’t going to accept your ideas, and he needed some more ideas (or maybe more specific ideas about how he could manage in Lakewood, and what resources he could find there.)
I was hoping that other people could give also give him ideas, and maybe there would be something (or a combination of somethings) that could work for him.January 30, 2018 7:28 pm at 7:28 pm #1460231
I have now run out of options here. I have a court date next week for eviction, in a hick town. Here, in order to survive, I would have to work on SHABBOS without any doubt. How these companies, in a whole tnts have forced them into much smaller quarters, with my wife already sleeping on a sfa due to lack of space.own can get away with this form of discrimination is far beyond me. But they do. When evicted I will loose everything I own. I am trying to get back to NY metro area, but it has not been easy at all. I will most likely be giving up all of my sefforim, etc to goyim who will just trash all as worthless. WHAT a sorry waste! I simply may not be able to rescue anything, but a very limited amount of anything. Shabbos SHOULD be a BRACHA….but for me, HERE it has been a complete failure. I really do hope that Hashem is watching carefully and will replace my huge losses. I have family in Brooklyn, but recently my wife has had to move to a much smaller place where she is vastly overcrowded already. She sleeps on a sofa. I will just have to find room on the floor. I will have no room for my clothes so I will live out of a suitcase. The place is already much too small for the people there now, but I will have to squeeze in somehow. My wife was compelled to move as her past landlord wanted her old place back.She had quite a bit of trouble finding a new place as rents are sky high in Brooklyn. She had to settle on this place, even though there was not enough room. She also had to discard must of her belongings as there was no room for them in her new place. .My adult daughters, who are unmarried, are still living at home. cannot afford to move out. They also trimmed down considerably. They are quite overcrowded in the bedrooms. My own stuff, left there, was shipped to me with a considerable expense. NOW my stuff will most probably be going also. I will have less than them….basically just what would fit in one suitcase is all I would have left. The bedrooms are tiny, as are the living room and also the kitchen, only the RENT is big. In moving, she is paying more for a much smaller place. The kitchen only holds a table for two. The living room is very small I have been told. This is what I will be reduced to. At best, I will be able to save one set of weekday clothes and a set of Shabbos clothes. And the two small closets are already packed for those now in the apartment. As my wife works in one place and my kids in another direction, moving is not much of an option…if we could afford it. And we as parents are no longer young. The apartment is already on the very fringes of the Jewish community, with little nearby. I would love to be able to move elsewhere, but my wife has a license for her job only good for NY. She is also trying to stay where she is so she can get a pension in a few years. AND….our kids are also struggling. I myself…was hoping to be able to relocate to another area, such as LAKEWOOD, or upstate ny, , with my wife joining me at a later time, when she could. Now, we all will be trapped in much too expensive Brooklyn. Our life savings are completely used up.January 30, 2018 7:39 pm at 7:39 pm #1460249MenoParticipant
So you can’t get a job because you’re living in a hick town and they want you to work on shabbos, while your wife and kids are in brooklyn, and the only reason I’ve heard so far why you can’t move out to be with your wife and kids and get a job is that you will be leaving your seforim behind. Meanwhile, people have been giving suggestions and you just seem to ignore them and keep insisting that you have no more options.
Honestly I’m not sure what you’re looking for here.January 31, 2018 12:22 am at 12:22 am #1460270
I did try for quite a while to job search long distance. First, I had left my location on resume, got very little interest at all.I was NOT in area, so why bother. After I removed location from my resume, I started to get responses, but few wanted to do an interview long distance and I do not have the funds to travel, especially back and forth. When I was getting unemployment here is was very little, certainly not enough to be able to travel. But, on so called local advise here, I stopped applying for jobs i n NY area, and concentrated on where I was. The unemployment authorities had objected to my out of area searching for jobs. They would monitor my searches closely, and challenged quite a few out of town job searches and applications. I was audited several times during my unemployment and had to prove everything or I would have benefits taken away. Now..I have fully decided to give up HERE. I am trying to get back to ny area. I HAVE been listening to peoples advise . Ironically….I got a phone call, just a short time ago, from a former coworker here who had relocated a while ago…..quite suddenly. He told me that HE had encountered the exact same bias I have found here. Had I been aware of this before…I also would have left here….long ago….without wasting my time here. People here have encouraged me to stay….but now I am ignoring them. I have NO other choice. Originally I had thought that I was the only one with this Shabbos bias, now I know I was not alone. And….now I have it confirmed that the bias is REAL.January 31, 2018 1:23 pm at 1:23 pm #1460611MenoParticipant
Just to be clear, you’re a frum Jew living in a hick town with no other Jews, away from your wife and kids, for absolutely no reason other than the fact that you can’t afford a bus ticket?January 31, 2018 6:06 pm at 6:06 pm #1460870DovidBTParticipant
Originally I had thought that I was the only one with this Shabbos bias, now I know I was not alone. And….now I have it confirmed that the bias is REAL.
In my opinion, the non-observant Jewish movements, and their “flexibility” in regard to religious practice, are to blame for the “Shabbos bias”.
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