August 12, 2016 4:55 pm at 4:55 pm #618117
are girls allowed to dye their hair?August 12, 2016 6:31 pm at 6:31 pm #1170905zahavasdadParticipant
Only Pink and Neon GreenAugust 12, 2016 7:12 pm at 7:12 pm #1170906MDGParticipant
Men are not allowed to dye their hair because of begged Isha. With that in mind, clearly it’s considered OK for a girl to do so.
BTW, there may be those who matir for men nowadays.August 12, 2016 8:27 pm at 8:27 pm #1170907
From what I heard the dye would be a chatzitzah when she goes to the mikvah
I don’t really know the halachos but my friend who is married wanted to dye her hair ombre brown to blonde and she wasn’t allowed cause it would be a chatzitzah. But her mom got a heter to dye her grey hair brown because it’s her natural color. So I think you have to ask your local rabbi cause two different rabbis gave different psaksAugust 12, 2016 9:10 pm at 9:10 pm #1170908
Sadgirlygirl – so basically yes especially if the girl has bad genes and gets white hairs at a VERY young age and is in shidduchim.August 14, 2016 4:05 pm at 4:05 pm #1170909
I didn’t say thatAugust 14, 2016 5:02 pm at 5:02 pm #1170910
Sadgirlygirl – you said a lady got a heter to turn her hair back to her natural color.August 14, 2016 7:07 pm at 7:07 pm #1170913Mashiach AgentMember
Why can’t a lady allowed to dye not be allowed any color and not only certain colors?August 14, 2016 7:41 pm at 7:41 pm #1170914
If she’s in shidduchim, she’s not going to the Mikveh, so it’s not a problem.
If she’s married, she should ask a sheilah.August 14, 2016 9:43 pm at 9:43 pm #1170915
lilmod ulelamaid – is she allowed to go blonde if shes brunette?August 14, 2016 10:01 pm at 10:01 pm #1170916
Sparkly I thought your wjole issue was that you’re in shidduchim with grey hairAugust 14, 2016 10:06 pm at 10:06 pm #1170917
Sadgirlygirl – no. i was asking if someone wants to go blonde and their hair is gray.August 15, 2016 12:58 am at 12:58 am #1170918
Sparkly – I don’t know. I don’t think there’s a halachic issue. I think it’s the type of thing that some people might disapprove of. Personally, I think that if you don’t have grey hair and you are stam dying your hair from brunette to blond, it might not be a good idea, because it could give people a wrong impression of you.
On the other hand, if you have grey hair and have to dye your hair anyhow, it’s kind of like “why not just dye it the color you want?” but still, it could look funny to others. I would suggest going slowly – like maybe, the first time you dye your hair, make it a bit lighter than usual, and each time, make it a bit lighter, but I wouldn’t go from total brunette to total blonde.
However, that is just my opinion. I don’t think there are halachic problems, and if you think that in your circles, people won’t talk about you or have the wrong impression of you, do what you want.August 15, 2016 1:09 am at 1:09 am #1170919
lilmod ulelamaid – no one would talk about me. everyone else wants me to dye my hair because of so many whites for a young girl in her young 20. they would love my hair.August 15, 2016 1:26 am at 1:26 am #1170920
Right,but we weren’t just talking about dying your hair -we were talking about changing the color. There is a difference between dying to the natural color and dying to a different color. But again, it may depend on your circles.
I still would suggest going slowly – but that’s just my opinion.August 15, 2016 1:39 am at 1:39 am #1170921yitayningwutParticipant
It is an explicit halacha in Shulchan Aruch that women’s hair dye is not a chatzitza. YD 198:17.August 15, 2016 2:42 am at 2:42 am #1170922
yitayningwut – i guess its like nail polish? as long as its newly done? but its harder for LONG hair past the waist that was dyed because then you need to grow your hair out because then youll have to cut everything off and most people with long hair dont want to go short otherwise you need to keep dying your hair.August 15, 2016 2:53 am at 2:53 am #1170923
yitaynignwut: That may be (I can’t look it up right now) but one should still ask a sheilah and not make assumptions. We don’t necessarily posken by the Shulchan Aruch (especially Ashkenazim), and I am pretty sure that someone I know had to take the dye out of her hair before going to the Mikvah.August 15, 2016 4:10 am at 4:10 am #1170924
lilmod ulelamaid – how do you take dye out of your hair? its there forever. it cant come off.August 15, 2016 4:46 am at 4:46 am #1170925
There are alot of ways to take out die…wikihow has a couple of waysAugust 15, 2016 5:04 am at 5:04 am #1170926
Sadgirlygirl – i have no clue why i didnt know you could remove permanent hair dye but it sounds HARD to do so. but now i feel like dying my hair even more lol. i knew you could remove hair dye that only stayed in for a few times but not permanent.August 15, 2016 9:19 am at 9:19 am #1170927Abba_SParticipant
There should be no reason a “Girl” can’t dye her hair as she doesn’t go to the Mikvah. A married women who must go to the mikvah may have a problem if it prevents the water from getting to the hair. It should be noted that some of these dyes may cause CANCER.August 15, 2016 10:00 am at 10:00 am #1170928
Abba_S: Thanks for the info, but single girls with white or gray hair don’t really have a choice in the matter.August 15, 2016 2:09 pm at 2:09 pm #1170930
Abba_S – i dont think that dyes cause cancer as much as cellphones, computers, etc… do.
lilmod ulelamaid – just because your single doesnt mean you NEED to dye your hair.August 15, 2016 2:26 pm at 2:26 pm #1170931👑RebYidd23Participant
Of course single girls with gray hair have a choice. There is nothing wrong with gray hair.August 15, 2016 2:41 pm at 2:41 pm #1170932
Technically, a single girl with grey hair doesn’t have to dye her hair, but that would be a really bad idea, imho.August 15, 2016 2:50 pm at 2:50 pm #1170933
RebYidd23 – its ugly.August 15, 2016 3:00 pm at 3:00 pm #1170934
i’m sorry but I need to chime in here. The two people most strongly speaking out against being insulting to others seem to be forgetting to turn the mirror in their own direction.
I had a streak of grey hair from early in my childhood and nobody gave a hoot. Come time to go out and the shadchanim were all over it. I never felt so ugly and degraded. They presented it as “ugly”, “a turn off”, “makes a bad impresion” etc. You know what?! That was MY choice. If they want me to put on a false front then they have their priorities all messed up. And I know some of you have your opinions about that, we’ve already discussed it, but those comments from you both are very cutting and judgemental. And if GD FORBID the person is grey because she is an older single than I believe you have some serious agmos nefesh on your hands.
Thank you for listening.August 15, 2016 3:06 pm at 3:06 pm #1170935
Syag Lchochma – my issue is that i want to look pretty but have a streak of gray hair. this is NOT why im an older single chasvichilla and im NOT an older single b’h.August 15, 2016 3:07 pm at 3:07 pm #1170936
and i forget to mention the stupidest part of all is that NOBODY EVEN SEES YOUR HAIR!!August 15, 2016 3:12 pm at 3:12 pm #1170938
Syag Lchochma – they do see my hair its not covered im not married yet.August 15, 2016 3:28 pm at 3:28 pm #1170939apushatayidParticipant
The over the counter hair coloring treatments are certainly not permanent.August 15, 2016 3:33 pm at 3:33 pm #1170940golferParticipant
Actually, Syag, somebody does see your hair.
And that’s the only person you really care about when it comes to looking nice.
Still no reason for shadchanim to make you feel ugly and degraded.
In this season of trying to be dan l’kaf z’chus, I guess maybe you could say they were trying to be helpful. But what they told you is so unhelpful and counterproductive that is borders on being brainless.
Everyone knows that besides all the other attributes too numerous to list, (some of which, justifiably, won’t make it past our vigilant Mods) what makes a person look most attractive is that feeling of self confidence that it seems the shadchanim you dealt with were doing their best to eradicate.
Lucky (I deduce from your posts) they were spectacularly unsuccessful in keeping you away from your zivug.August 15, 2016 3:38 pm at 3:38 pm #1170941
Syag Lchochma, I am really sorry if I made you feel bad. I totally did not mean to make anyone feel bad, and I had no idea that anyone would.
Here’s where I was coming from: As an older single with grey hair, I felt that RebYidd23 and Abba_S were being judgmental of me for dyeing my hair and of Sparkly for considering dying her hair. I dye my hair because I think that it is the right thing to do, because I don’t like the way my hair looks when it’s gray and it looks much much nicer when I dye it to its natural color. I think that Sparkly is right for wanting to dye her hair and that no one should be scaring her by telling her that it causes cancer. If it’s important to her to look pretty (as it should be), she should not worry about getting cancer, and neither should I. You can’t live your life like that!
That was my only point, and I hope you are not offended.
I did not understand your last sentence: ” And if GD FORBID the person is grey because she is an older single than I believe you have some serious agmos nefesh on your hands.”
Which person are you referring to? The only people I was referring to were myself and Sparkly.August 15, 2016 3:40 pm at 3:40 pm #1170942
btw, RebYidd23 and Abba_S: I didn’t mean to imply that you were being judgmental. I just meant that I felt like I had to defend my decision.August 15, 2016 3:45 pm at 3:45 pm #1170943
thanks golfer for the undeserved compliments!
I know we discussed that issue before, at this time I was really pointing more to the idea that it is not appropriate to make such comments about greying hair any more than about being fat. If you don’t like your grey, then dye it. But don’t call it ugly and give the impression a person might be making the wrong choice if they don’t dye it because that isn’t fair. Some people may not care, some people may have made peace with it and it isn’t necessary to catagorize it as a negative without giving a thought to all the people it may apply to.
I didn’t feel insulted, the rest of my hair was grey long ago and I honestly forgot I even had a grey streak til it came up here a couple times. It isn’t about me, tho. It’s about being sensitive even about things that you don’t think are a problem. Anytime you are going to comment negatively about an appearance, realize there are many others out there who may be swept into the same catagory. If it is universally bad, than fine. But sometimes it isn’t.August 15, 2016 3:53 pm at 3:53 pm #1170944
apushatayid – i was referring to the ones that are permanent the ones that dont come out just from washing it like 5 times.
golfer – good point.
lilmod ulelamaid – G-d forbid that i should ever be an older single i will h’h get married SOON. also what do you mean by an older single? someone in their young 20 should NOT be considered an older single. your not an older single till your 30. and thats TERRIBLE for someone to not get married because they have white hairs. what is this world coming to? dying your hair should be because you want to and you think it looks good.August 15, 2016 5:10 pm at 5:10 pm #1170945
Sparkly – who said that you are an older single?? And who said anything about someone not getting married because they have white hair?
And being an older single is not the worst thing in the world by the way!August 15, 2016 5:37 pm at 5:37 pm #1170946apushatayidParticipant
“apushatayid – i was referring to the ones that are permanent the ones that dont come out just from washing it like 5 times.”
Many OTC coloring treatments last several weeks, or more. Having asked the shayla on behalf of my wife, I can say that as far as a chatzitza is concerned, “it depends”, ask a shayla. If you are asking about the hashkafa of doing so I dont think I have much to add to whats been said.August 15, 2016 5:58 pm at 5:58 pm #1170947
Many bald or balding frum men grow their hair long and comb it over the bald area to attempt to hide their baldness.
Does anyone know if there is a heter for them to wear a comb-over as they are trying to appear younger?August 15, 2016 6:10 pm at 6:10 pm #1170948MenoParticipant
Comb-overs don’t make men look younger.August 15, 2016 6:11 pm at 6:11 pm #1170949JosephParticipant
cherrybim, is that any different than wearing youthful looking clothing or shaving (either to avoid a graying beard or to achieve a youthful look without any beard)?August 15, 2016 8:00 pm at 8:00 pm #1170950
Both men with grey beards and dark beards shave, so it’s not so apparent. However, only bald men do the comb-over because they think it makes them look younger (it really makes them look ridiculous). Is the comb-over any different than men dying their hair to look younger (which is assur)?August 15, 2016 8:25 pm at 8:25 pm #1170951JosephParticipant
The dying is assur because of beged isha. How would the other things mentioned be beged isha?August 15, 2016 8:36 pm at 8:36 pm #1170952
lilmod ulelamaid – that is true. not having good health and being sick is the worst.August 15, 2016 8:36 pm at 8:36 pm #1170953
According to poskim, making yourself look younger comes under beged isha.August 15, 2016 9:13 pm at 9:13 pm #1170954
cherrybim – how so?August 15, 2016 9:57 pm at 9:57 pm #1170955Abba_SParticipant
I never said females can’t dye their hair, however there maybe some health problems involved. You should consult your doctor before using hair dyes, as premature graying maybe a symptom of a disease. Also hair dyes have tar and many of the same carcinogens as tobacco the only different is that not as much is absorbed through the scalp if it is washed off quickly, as is absorbed by inhaling so the doctor’s insight maybe helpful.
I just think that people should know that hair dyes are toxic and are not as healthy as food dye. I am in no way trying to scare anyone. You should know the risks involved before using these dyes.August 16, 2016 1:34 am at 1:34 am #1170957
Sparkly – and not having friends & a good support system or money are much worse. So are depression and anxiety and not being happy with oneself. Also, not finding meaning in one’s life.
In any case, I am an older single and, Boruch Hashem, I am very happy (at least most of the time), and I feel that I have a lot to thank Hashem for and that being single is not the end of the world.
Also having a bad marriage or being divorced are worse! I have heard a lot of horror stories lately!August 16, 2016 4:33 pm at 4:33 pm #1170960MenoParticipant
Also tornadoes. Tornadoes are bad. I think pretty much everyone would agree.
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