October 26, 2011 9:57 pm at 9:57 pm #822021smartcookieMember
BPT- I’m not quite sure about that….:)
But I hear what you’re suggesting. However, I might just purchase that $2400 wig, then buy him a gift with another $2400.
Now, that should work!October 26, 2011 10:19 pm at 10:19 pm #822022
“Now, that should work! “
In a way.
But to really get the full appreciation you deserve, you’ll need to buy him something thats worth 10x the cost of your shaitel.
Hmm, what can be had today for $24,000?
After all, what’s money when we’re talking about sholom bayis?October 27, 2011 1:25 pm at 1:25 pm #822023mommamia22Participant
I’ve had the $500 Shaitels and the $3500 Shaitels and I can tell you there is a big difference, IMHO.
The 3500 one is matched to your specifications, color, cap size, etc. The 500 one (in my experience) had little elastic bands to tighten the fit (not as well made), was machine made (had rows of fabric with hair tied on vs. Solid net cap. The difference there is major. I once sat on a bus behind a woman with a Shaitel with fabric “rows”. When the hair moved even slightly, I could see the fabric lines. I wanted to tell her but realized she’d just be ashamed. Don’t assume it’s invisible. It’s not. Especially when the wind blows. My expensive customs were so well made that on occasion my husband thought I had yet to put on my Shaitel when it was already on! There can also be additional issues withquality that go unseen initially, such as clumping and knotting of hair at the nape of the neck. All Shaitels need to be brushed out bait, but I’ve heard some real horror stories from people about this.October 27, 2011 2:22 pm at 2:22 pm #822024miritchkaMember
smartcookie: kol hakavod! enjoy your wig!
bpt: good one! if i had that kind of money to use on a gift…lol!
mommamia22: i’m sure (and i hope) there is a difference, after all you are paying quite alot of $! i personally wouldnt, but i have to say they are beautiful! wear it in good health! One thing you mentioned is another reason i wouldnt buy those really amazing customs, its hard to tell that one is wearing a wig…October 27, 2011 2:58 pm at 2:58 pm #822025gr82bagrandmaMember
There is a definite difference between the expensive custom wigs & cheaper ones. The major difference is the lightness & fit of the wig. It makes a huge difference if you have to wear a wig the whole day.
Before any husbands comment, I suggest they wear both kinds of wigs for a couple of hours & see what a difference it makes, especially in the summer!October 27, 2011 3:15 pm at 3:15 pm #822026
” wear both kinds of wigs for a couple of hours “
I’m the first to admit, were I to need to be the one wearing a shaitel, it would take all of 5 minutes for me to decide a tiechel is the way to go. And a better teichel for Shabbos.
The shaitel (no matter what price) would only be for simchasOctober 27, 2011 3:36 pm at 3:36 pm #822027NechomahParticipant
BPT, don’t be so quick to say that a tichel is the way to go. For some women, they may feel frumpy and unattractive in one, while a sheitel makes them feel pretty and boosts their self esteem. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m totally opposed to spending even $1000 on anything for my head, but I did recently spend $600 on a sheitel for my son’s Bar Mitzvah and hated it – I felt pressured to buy it and it was not a good color for me nor was the cut what I wanted. I was so unhappy that I ended up changing sheitelmachers (after being friends with and going to the same one for more than 10 years) and I bought a different sheitel from the new sheitelmacher and she cut it just how I wanted and I made sure to try on a few to make sure that the color was good. I’m very happy with the new one and it means that I ended up spending more than $1000 in 6 months for 2 different sheitels, but I figured my self esteem was worth it.October 27, 2011 3:53 pm at 3:53 pm #822028old manParticipant
It’s fine to spend the money. After all, mitzvas cost money. Zeh Keli V’anveihu.October 27, 2011 4:30 pm at 4:30 pm #822029
I hear you loud and clear, Nechomah. But consider this: most of us (myself included) are far from movie star material. But what makes us shine, is our sunny disposition, our general outlook on life, our willingness to go the extra mile for a friend.
Not a head of hair that was lopped off someone in a 3rd world counrty (ok, maybe blonds and redheads come from Europe, but thats not the point).
Self esteem and how you feel about yourself should be based on who you are, not what you look like.
And while your shaitel may look fantastic, my teichel (as it were) is much more comfortable under a helmet, or while playing ball!October 27, 2011 4:43 pm at 4:43 pm #822030smartcookieMember
Oh BPT your words are so unrealistic. Maybe that’s the way it should be, (Sheker Hachein Vhevel Hayofi),but you know that doesn’t happen!October 27, 2011 5:08 pm at 5:08 pm #822031mommamia22Participant
I totally agree with you. Frankly, with this whole insanity of “my future wife/kallah can’t be too skinny/skinny enough” I think suggesting women be satisfied with tichels is just way off base. The only way women can do such a thing is if their husbands are ok with it and can even convey that they are beautiful as such. We’re very far from that kind of an existence. Telling women to wear things that many men think are ugly (my husband calls tichels a sock) would only serve to be machshil people.October 27, 2011 6:21 pm at 6:21 pm #822032
Ahem. Might I suggest a quick walk thru Flatbush, Willy or EY, as many women wear headcoverings of the non-shaitel type, and look very balbatish and stylish at the same time.October 27, 2011 6:27 pm at 6:27 pm #822033Pashuteh YidMember
You used to be able to go into National Wholesale Liquidators and get one for 25 dollars. I think I passed by a store in Freeport, LI which had some in the window, as well. How much could they be?October 27, 2011 6:47 pm at 6:47 pm #822034Yankie DoodleMember
Paula Young is perfect.October 27, 2011 11:49 pm at 11:49 pm #822035OfcourseMember
cshapiro, you got me curious who cuts well for $100. Please come back. Looking forward.October 28, 2011 4:57 am at 4:57 am #822036NechomahParticipant
BPT, of course you’re right, and in reality, I DO spend most of my time in a sheitel, which for me is for Shabbos/YT and simchos, but my husband is someone who doesn’t really comment about how I look (unless there’s a problem of course) and knows that it’s a matter of comfort. Sure my tichel is more comfortable and I’m sure there are tons of styles out there that don’t look anything like a “sock” as mom22 called them, but it takes a lot of persistence and desire to try out different styles and see what looks good on. Maybe your wife should have a tichel party, where women come and try on new things, like a tupperware party, haha.
Also, given that a woman’s weight can change a lot over the course of her life (pregnancy, etc), the shape of her face changes and what looked good before doesn’t always look good later on, but a sheitel always looks good, maybe a short cut won’t look so good if she’s puffy at the end of a pregnancy, but mid-length styles are almost always complimentary to the way a woman looks.
I guess the bottom line comes a lot from our husbands in how we feel about ourselves. Like mom22 said, if you guys out there would compliment us the same with our tichels on as with our sheitels, then we won’t feel the need to spend crazy amounts on these things.October 28, 2011 7:13 am at 7:13 am #822037tahiniMember
Of course a sheitel is a valuable commodity and the right one can make a woman look fantastic, many times I have been amazed at the transformation a good sheitel can make.We want to look nice for our husbands and indeed many men hate tichels and snoods. But it is also nice for a husband to have a wife who looks good for him alone!!! I am not saying go out plain and simple, a nice sheitel/haircovering is always important, but our biggest duty and pleasure is to look good for our husbands. My husband before we married begged me never to cut my long hair short, so I wear a variety of scarves in the Israeli style, with make up and coordinating outfits etc for much of the time, sure for Shabbat and Simchas I get a lovely shevy sheitel out, but my own hair that my husband alone sees is in peak condition, thick, nicely coloured and for him alone. My daughters do the same, they do not look dowdy at all with their scarves, often getting compliments from strangers as to how to tie them up and where they can buy them from.October 28, 2011 2:57 pm at 2:57 pm #822038miritchkaMember
tahini: i read your post and i totally agree. my husband really likes when i wear a shaitel as opposed to a snood. (However, he tells me that when he comes home and i’m wearing a shaitel, it looks like i havent realaxed since i came home adn he wants me to wear a snood then! Men!) Anyway, he also wants me to keep my hair long and thick the way it was by our wedding. i did for a while. but then it started giving me headaches when i wore it in a shaitel. so i had it cut. I told the lady to cut it short but long enough to fit all my hair in one pony (which is a bit past shoulder legnth.) She cut it a bit above my shoulder (shorter). I hate how i look but i dont care so much for myself cuz its usually covered. My husband cant wait for it to grow back…i learned my lesson well. My hair is staying long.October 28, 2011 3:39 pm at 3:39 pm #822039tahiniMember
Miritchka, hope your hair grows fast!
I have noticed that ladies who do wear snoods more often than sheitels tend to have better natural hair, but must be honest and say for work and special occasions I do go for the sheitel. We are lucky to be able to alternate between the twoOctober 28, 2011 5:58 pm at 5:58 pm #822040adorableParticipant
bpt- you are right except that reality has it that if you are not dressed well you wont feel good about yourself.
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