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pba: hiding ones issue whether the issue is toenail fungus or anxiety?
Helpful:
If you think he is going to reject you over toenail fungus, you probably shouldn’t get married to him.
Haros – are u serious about the kittel question or are you mocking divorcees right after yom kippur?
Eclpise – you sound very bitter, but I understand why. If you don’t have kids you can move on. If you do and have custody -you can also move on. It will take time, but it can be reality if you work on it. I sometimes have to work on it everyday.
Popa –
Sorry, you’re right. I mean emotional issues.
But you are also right; what is the geder of relevant. I don’t know; I suppose one could judge on a case by case basis.
And on thinking about, you are right, you do create a catch 22, because ultimately who wants to hide something that is a real part of you from your spouse – where there should be no secrets. And ultimately, the broken trust could be worse then anything else (you were in therapy for three years because_________ and you never told me?!!1- would ‘I spoke to my Rav, he said not to tell, and my therapist gave me a clean bill of health’ – suffice?)
I do not know. I see your point.
Moq:
I agree, that is the way to say it; it is a catch 22.
It is a very hard situation. We have tried to sweep all the issues under the couch, but it’s starting to get a bit crowded.
Ultimately, there will have to be a communal acceptance of the realities of our world.