Does The YWN Coffee Room Need a Mechitza

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  • #1674304

    Haimy
    Participant

    Is it appropriate for anonymous men & women to be shmoozing together via the coffee room? Or is it so regulated that it makes no difference who is the poster?

    #1674332

    YW Moderator-25
    Moderator
    #1674373

    Uncle Ben
    Participant

    The purpose of a mechitza is to avoid kalus rosh between the genders. I haven’t seen that happening and even if it happened to a mild extent since posters can’t contact one another directly it shouldn’t be a problem. Unless it causes people to pursue kalus rosh in real life then it may be of concern.

    #1674381

    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    1. How dare you assume people’s genders. Perhaps I identify as a genderless alien.
    2. How do you know we ALL aren’t genderless aliens? You can’t prove were not; it’s all anonymous.

    #1674410

    Riverdale2
    Participant

    Chances are that some of the people going by male names are in truth female and vice versa. That thought alone should give pause to anyone who would potentially get inappropriate feelings of uninhibitedness, thinking they are conversing with the opposite gender.

    #1674420

    ☕️coffee addict
    Participant

    Riverdale,

    Wouldn’t that be בגד אשה?

    #1674421

    Gadolhadorah
    Participant

    Build that wall!!!! ….and make the poskim from Yeshiva Chovevei Torah (in Riverdale) responsible for its construction so we are certain that everyone (of any intellectual height) can see through it

    #1674427

    2scents
    Participant

    The mods act as a machitza.

    #1674431

    iacisrmma
    Participant

    Yes, a separate list for trolls.

    #1674443

    Takes2-2tango
    Participant

    Lets ask the artscroll group what they think.
    After all it was made for balleobatim,and since most commentators here are not in kollel, they must be bakeibatim

    #1674487

    Participant
    Participant

    It does need one. No one shojuld daven here until they put up a proper mechitza.

    #1674510

    Haimy
    Participant

    The question is if by schmoozing with the opposite gender over here it dulls a person’s sensitivity to remain separate which then affects behavior offline too. You can’t completely separate the virtual world from the real world around you.
    If your hocking with a female on ywn, what will stop you from hocking with someone at the office water cooler. You’ve gotten comfortable schmoozing with ladies in a virtual form.
    The brain is a complex instrument that doesn’t always follow raw logic.

    #1674513

    Gadolhadorah
    Participant

    In case you haven’t noticed, we likely have some bi-postal posters who raise totally different halachic issues. As a practical matter though, a single-gender forum would be more of an echo chamber than the vibrant exchange of ideas and thoughts that we have… a virtual varbeshe section behind a firewall of sorts would be considerably less stimulating.

    #1674529

    Joseph
    Participant

    “would be considerably less stimulating.”

    That’s exactly what’s required. That special stimulating needs to be avoided.

    #1674539

    knaidlach
    Participant

    Haimy
    this is on my mind. not sure if its appropriate. i am thinking maybe to leave the coffee room.
    or maybe people should write in a way that you cant know their gender. just stick to the topic

    #1674550

    Gadolhadorah
    Participant

    ” If your hocking with a female on ywn, what will stop you from hocking with someone at the office water cooler.

    Haimy: perhaps you should not be c’v “working” in an office with a water cooler since we all know watercooler schmoozing is the source of much of the pritzus in the secular world. Thats why many mashgichim don’t allow bochurim to place a water bottle on a shtender in the beis medrash since it is such a slippery slope…

    #1674555

    Haimy
    Participant

    I don’t think this kind of virtual intermingling would fly in E.Y.
    In America we’re so used to mixed gender offices it seems normal. Really, men & women should not be casually chatting together even virtually. A recent study showed that the members of the opposite gender in an office the higher the risk of divorce. My concern is that this innocent chit chat is eroding the healthy barriers that once existed between the genders among erlicher yidden.

    #1674570

    knaidlach
    Participant

    haimy are you leaving the CR?

    #1674600

    Haimy
    Participant

    For me the coffee room is a place to soundboard ideas, not social interaction. Some might call me a troll because I start a topic & then drop out. Even if such a forum is acceptable in our time we should at least be aware of the spiritual cost it has on us. I think a gender exclusive forum would be more popular with the general readership of ywn. From a readership of many thousands only a small percentage ever post. It doesn’t pas for people to jump into a mixed gender conversation.

    #1674651

    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Haimy: The Virtual World altogether doesn’t “fly” so easily here.

    #1674639

    HolyvsLake
    Participant

    What does the physical characteristic of a schtender being a slope have anything to do with shmuzing
    “Thats why many mashgichim don’t allow bochurim to place a water bottle on a shtender in the beis medrash
    since it is such a slippery slope…”

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