Eating Out Loud

Home Forums Decaffeinated Coffee Eating Out Loud

Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 40 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #588864

    loyalyid
    Member

    A topic that’s hardly being addressed at home, in school, and even in open forums.

    My parents taught me, that eating silently – with a closed mouth – is not only simple manners, it’s derech eretz, and it does not irritate the people around you, versus eating with an open mouth, letting the non-pleasant melodies of the tongue hitting up and around ring out it’s ugly tones to the entire “audience”.. some people are eating so loud with such geshmak and weird noises, that it can aggravate the most calm and passionate person.

    looking around and observing for years, I learned that most people are aware of how to eat in a nice manner, and keep their tone closed in to themselves. however, there are many people who would just spoil a table at a wedding, mesiba or at dinner by eating with a wide open mouth, letting everyone know of their activity…

    I’m interested to hear the public opinion, am I too over mannered, and expecting something out of the ordinary, or is this the normal way to eat with all kinds of sounds and strange noises?

    #627902

    oomis
    Participant

    May this be the absolutely WORST problem facing Klal Yisroel today!!!! Not to minimize what you said, though, because poor table manners are really disgusting. I did not follow through on a shidduch for a friend, because when I chanced to observe the young man, his manners were worse than atrocious, and I knew the girl would be offended to be set up with him, as she is very eidel. And how do you tell someone something like that, without hurting his feelings? It took him all his life to learn to eat like a bulvan. Either he has no idea of how he looks to other people, or he does not care. Either way, it is a VERY touchy problem. But it is also disgusting to hear loud smacking noises, and/or see food being chewed in an open mouth.

    #627903

    The Big One
    Participant

    loyalyid, you are 100% correct.

    #627904

    intellegent
    Member

    RAAAAA!

    It really drives me nuts (But I don’t know if I can be described as the most calm…)

    #627905

    Loyalyid, you are absolutely not “too over mannered”; eating silently and with one’s mouth closed is polite courtesy and should not be de-emphasized. However, I agree with oomis- I would rejoice if we had nothing else to worry about but this!

    Incidentally, did anyone else read the Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle series as a child? One of those books has a very cute story addressing table manners. If I remember correctly, her method of correcting bad habits involved the assistance of a pet called Lester the pig. I used to love those books!

    #627906

    intellegent
    Member

    If you mention it to any of these people, they say that that is the only way they can eat but I wonder if they ever bothered trying an other way.

    #627907

    jewishfeminist02-

    The book you are referring to is:

    Title – Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle’s Magic

    Author – Betty MacDonald

    Story – The Bad-Table-Manners Cure

    The entire set can be bought from Amazon.

    If anyone is looking for kid’s book recommendations , I’d be glad to help (as long as the book existed 20+ years ago).

    As best as I can remember, this series has nothing objectionable, except if you prefer not to have any secular books in your house at all.

    #627908

    anon for this
    Participant

    jewishfeminist02,

    Actually this thread reminded me of that chapter too. I spend a lot of time reading aloud to my kids, and the Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle series is one they enjoy hearing.

    #627909

    xerox
    Member

    When a person chews with their mouth open… well it drives me crazy!!!! i can’t handle the noises!!! very annoying!!

    Does anyone have any suggestions that could I tell the person to chew with their mouth closed- politely?!?

    #627910

    anon for this
    Participant

    ICOT,

    What children’s books would you recommend?

    #627911

    anon for this-

    What ages and interests?

    (Approximation is fine. If you prefer not to answer the “ages” part, I’ll base my recommendations areound the “Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle” level).

    #627912

    anon for this
    Participant

    I suppose I’d prefer books for the “read-aloud” ages, that is the age ranges of my kids who like to hear books read aloud. That would be ages 5-10 for us. Would you prefer to start a new thread for the reply, or to post it in the random questions thread, to end the hijack of loyalyid’s thread?

    #627913

    Anonymous

    start a new thread for this.

    #627914

    Good point.

    New thread it is.

    loyalyid-

    My appologies for the thread hijack.

    #627915

    xerox
    Member

    No one answered so i’ll ask again:

    Is there a way that could I tell a person to chew with their mouth closed- politely?!?

    #627916

    noitallmr
    Participant

    xerox

    Depends who. Your mother in law? Not a chance. Your Brother? Shut your mouth please.

    Gotta specify who???

    #627917

    oomis
    Participant

    I agree, it really depends on the eprson. If it is your child or a relative in your peer group or even a close friend, you have different options. If it is someone with whom you need to watch your Ps and Qs, like a parent, an in-law, date, then you need to be more subtle or be mevateir altogether. If I were in a restaurant with someone doing that, I might make some kind of comment like an, “Oh my goodness,” and when the person asked me what elicited that comment, I would say, ” I couldn’t help but just notice that couple over there near us. He was chewing with his mouth open. That’s just so gross! I really appreciate people with good table manners!” Hopefully, that would encourage the person to live up to your expectations. At least, you have given subtle mussar without directing it specifically at him (or her).

    #627919

    jphone
    Member

    I echo the sentiment. This should be the biggest problem facing yidden today.

    #627920

    intellegent
    Member

    noitallmr

    LOL! Literally!

    (But you really shouldn’t say that to your brother…)

    #627921

    myshadow
    Member

    Yea all guys that are in the dating parsha out there! Listen up! No girl is gona be able to listen to a word you say if your gona chew out loud!

    #627922

    arc
    Participant

    I sit at a cubicle surrounded by incessant loud chewers it makes me crazy. I get that I’m sensitive to it but it’s exceedingly rude and distracting.

    #627923

    brooklyn19
    Participant

    oomis – tacky. i would never say something like that. you just don’t look and make sure to NEVER eat out with that person again!

    #627924

    oomis
    Participant

    “oomis – tacky. i would never say something like that. you just don’t look and make sure to NEVER eat out with that person again! “

    And here I thought I was being sensitive to the idea of subtly making the other person conscious of his own eating habits, without actually calling attention to his poor manners. And what if that person is someone with whom you WANT to go out again, and the manners are the only problem? BTW, for your information, my method is not only NOT tacky, it is the recommended practice for getting an unpleasant point across to someone whose feelings are important to you. By making a personal comment but directing it impersonally to someone else, usually hamyvin yavin. When someone in your office has bad body odor, do you tell them and risk embarrassing them, or do you talk about a variety of things, like your recent shopping excursion and mention a few bargains that you found INCLUDING a really nice smelling deodorant that you see really works so well for you. You hope the person will take the hint, but keep his/her dignity intact. In any case, not all people are in a position to “not look” at the person with whom they are dining.

    #627925

    brooklyn19
    Participant

    lol ok, ok. i guess you’re right. i’m just a mefuneket.

    #627926

    lesschumras
    Participant

    There is an element of the practice being a health danger. Many people who chew with open mouths also talk while chewing. This forces the airways in the throat to be open and allows for the possibility of food “going down the wrong pipe ” and choking. Heimlich Maneuver , anyone?

    #627927

    brooklyn19
    Participant

    yeah we were trained in high school. totally forgot most of CPR but i’m sure i would be able to do the heimlich maneuver if i needed to.

    #627928

    lesschumras- I am glad you brought up the topic of chewing health. There is a basic principle regarding chewing while eating. When chewing a bite full masticate each bite full at least 10-15 times so that food goes through in saliva form. This will make digestion easier for the chewer, and less stress full for their digestive tract.

    #627929

    myshadow
    Member

    Yankdownunder, u a nutritionist? how dyu know all this stuff?

    #627930

    Myshadow-I am not a nutritionist, although one point of my life I thought of becoming a Naturapath. I have been interested in Natural Diet,health, and hygiene for over 40 years. One of the levels of this discipline is chewing thoroughly( at least 10-15times per bite full), so each mouthful is in saliva form, thus creating less stress for the Digestive Tract. When I read lesschumras post I knew the subject matter was about choking RL. Chewing each bite full (at least 10-15 times), is a very simple thing we all can do. Everybody can benefit eating by chewing thoroughly. This must be suggested tactfully and kindly to anyone who eats with their mouth open. The main thing is not to be disgusted (by their eating habits) but only caring, and supportive.

    #627931

    myshadow
    Member

    yank: I hear you. I also heard that the best diet is to just chew everything really thoroughly, like you say around 10-15 times per bite. Is that true? Would someone lose weight by doing that?

    #627932

    noitallmr
    Participant

    Anyone here in Hatzolo besides for me??? (yes i do work for the FBI but my name aint WILL HILL)

    #627933

    Pashuteh Yid
    Member

    I would like to add my 2 cents worth regarding things that gross me out. People who lick money, or pages of books or bags in a supermarket. There are very effective ways to manipulate all these items without licking them.

    #627934

    myshadow
    Member

    pashuteh, they lick they’re fingers not the actual item that would be gross!

    #627935

    brooklyn19
    Participant

    ugh that is disgusting. i remember a teacher that couldn’t give out papers without licking her fingers first. i always took the bottom one – praying that by the time she touched the last one it wore off…

    #627936

    noitallmr
    Participant

    brooklyn19- you’re Swiss? Just kidding 😉

    #627937

    brooklyn19
    Participant

    yeah right!

    #627938

    My Shadow- It is true you can actually lose weight by chewing thoroughly. It takes a lot of energy to masticate so many times per bite full. The theory is one gets tired from the sheer amount of energy and discipline it takes that you leave from your plate eating less.

    #627939

    xerox
    Member

    Iv’e heard of chewing until the food is apple sauce consistence- is that part of the ramban’s (or rambam’s??) diet??

    #627940

    oomis
    Participant

    The theory is also that when one chews many times per bite, that it gives the brain a chance to signal to the body that it is full, hence we eat less.

    #627941

    Xerox-Probably the Rambam, because Rav. Moshe ben Maimon was the personal physician to the Sultan. He knew all kinds of healthful ideas such as drinking before or after a meal, but not during one. Also waiting several hours after eating to go to sleep. This is to let the food in the stomach have a chance to start being digested. He was a Master Herbalist who could identify and use plants to make Medicine to heal his patients.

Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 40 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.


Trending