November 30, 2019 10:36 pm at 10:36 pm #1806029RebbeDebbieParticipant
In addition to the important and standard questions regarding Shabbos tablecloths, paper versus plastic plates, height/weight, and middos. Here a few important ones to ask to ensure you have found your basheert.
Do they use candles or oil? If oil, are the cups prefilled? If candles, are the candles different colors, or just white and blue?
Do they light inside or outside?
Do females also light?
Do they use flour or matzah in the latkes? Is grated onion considered an essential ingredient?
Do they serve latkes with sour cream or applesauce?
Any other questions I am missing?December 1, 2019 10:14 am at 10:14 am #1806138
The Chasam Sofer questiions, why don’t females light when the neis also involved them? He says that originally they lit outside and it was improper for them to light among the men, so even now that we light inside the original custom remained . The Chasan Sofer explains the custom for the women not working as long the candles are burning. The yevonim wanted to eliminate Rosh Chodesh in order not to keep yomim tovim where the women light the candles. Min haTorah there are eighr days, so the women don’t work and the men light for the neis of the oil.December 1, 2019 1:37 pm at 1:37 pm #1806241iacisrmmaParticipant
In my family, the women lit. My wife’s family they didn’t. The question never came up,December 1, 2019 1:37 pm at 1:37 pm #1806246GadolhadorahParticipant
What are the prospective Choson’s family special minhagim for Zois Chanukah beyond saying taslich, etc.?December 5, 2019 2:32 pm at 2:32 pm #1808133devnyBlocked
I actually light for my husband because he’s too busy learning to take the time to light the menorah. Then he comes home, eats 100 latkes, and falls asleep on the couch till 2pm the next day.December 5, 2019 6:01 pm at 6:01 pm #1808264
devny, I would think that we stop learning and lighrt Chanukah candles as we stop learning to lein the megiila. The women is lighting to satisfy her own obligation. If he happens to be an away from his house,, is a different situation. He has an obligation to light on his own.December 10, 2019 8:12 am at 8:12 am #1809634interjectionParticipant
You missed, do they give gelt or presents?December 10, 2019 10:37 am at 10:37 am #1809630banjobobParticipant
a great question is whether the girl’s family does the doughnut challengeDecember 10, 2019 10:39 am at 10:39 am #1809678
Joseph, don’t be holier than thou. Light Chanukah candles yourself as everyone else does. See what I told your wife above.December 10, 2019 10:39 am at 10:39 am #1809679Old Crown HeightsParticipant
A deal breaker question would be, Does your family play nun-gimmel-hey-shin? Or do you hold from gimmel takes the pot? And more importantly, do you let the dreidel spin? or do you spin and smack it down?December 17, 2019 5:13 pm at 5:13 pm #1811534knaidlachParticipant
does your family prepare new wicks every night? or use the old ones?
i personally use the same again and again.December 17, 2019 7:45 pm at 7:45 pm #1811649
You should use new wicks for hiddur mitzva. In the Beis Hamikdash there was a mitzva of hatovas neros to replace the old wicks. According to the Rambam, Hilchas Temidim Umusofim 3,12 if it went out, ithey would clean it, replace it and relight it in the morning, but the Rashba holds that they would relight it in the afternoon.December 17, 2019 11:32 pm at 11:32 pm #1811817knaidlachParticipant
intersting. the maalla of using used one is that the fire catches on faster on used wicks.December 18, 2019 1:43 pm at 1:43 pm #1811865
The custom to relight candles in the shul in the morning according to the Sheorim Metzuyonim Behalacha on the Kitzur is based on the above Rambam. Even though it might not be seen in the light, but it is done for zecher lemikdash and not for parsumei nisei, I explained.December 18, 2019 1:44 pm at 1:44 pm #1811866
knaidlach, שתהי שלהבת עולה מאליה the light should catch on by itself.December 22, 2019 9:41 pm at 9:41 pm #1813028
devny, Rav Chaim Shlita agrees with me to stop learning and the husband should light himself,
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