"Not going to sleepaway camp" stigma

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    Teens in many communities who don’t go to sleepaway camp are made to feel as if they are not sociable.

    a mamin

    My X daughter in law didn’t go to camp. It definitely should have been a sign of her social awkwardness. You need to know the reason behind not wanting to go? Some people are just to homesick….

    Rebbe Yid

    So, if she’s sociable, and then people find out she didn’t go, they’re going to change their mind and consider her “not sociable?” I doubt it. OTOH, if someone’s not sociable in the first place, and then the busybodies find the non-camp history reinforces their preconceived notions, well that’s a different story.

    Spoken as someone who himself went to sleepaway a couple of times, and am normal but not particularly sociable.


    Any frum teen who lives in a family with 6 or more kids, or had spent Yuntif bunking in with 24+ assorted relatives and guest, or gone to a school Shabbaton has already gained the ‘sociable’ skills that 4-7 weeks in a camp bunk bring.

    The comment is a false front. What is really means is the teen’s parents can’t (or won’t) afford to send the teen to sleep-a-way camp.

    BTW>>>My parents met at Sleep-a-way camp back in 1932. My wife and I met at Sleep-a-way camp in 1970. My niece and her husband met at sleep-a-way camp in 1990. All of us were staff, not campers at the time.


    People are stupid and say stupid things because they need to ostracize everyone who is not like them because they have an inferiority complex.

    Letakein Girl

    I’ve never heard of anyone saying that! I’m in a regular Bais Yaakov somewhere in the Tri state area, and there are probably more girls not going to camp than are going. Tens of girls are working at day camps, and some are even making their own. Girls go to camp if their friends are going- it says nothing about their social IQ.


    this is true and teens should not think that way and they should not look at their friends and think that their friends are more sociable just because they go to sleepaway camp. sleepaway camp is NOT for everyone.


    There are lots of good reasons to go or not to go to “sleep-away” camp. We really should not evaluate a person on the basis of attending or not attending “sleep-away” camp, in part because we don’t know who made the decision, the person or his/her parents. Money is certainly a factor over which a child has little or no control, and it would be a breach of halacha to judge people on their parnassah.

    As for the second poster’s comment about her former daughter-in-law, social awkwardness might exist as much in the poster as in the former daughter-in-law. (I have assumed “x-daughter in law” means “former daughter-in-law”, not “X-ian daughter-in-law.”) Mothers-in-law, especially snobbish or judgmental ones, can be a leading cause of ex-daughters-in-law.

    a mamin

    Nfgo: I wish I would’ve been judge mental . Unfortunately I wasn’t .there were various signs which I chose to ignore , her not going to camp was one of them. I’m not saying this applies to everyone! As I said earlier, you need to know the reason behind it. Without knowing any details , I found you the one being judge mental by the way…… Don’t worry I’m not taking it personal.


    I did not go to sleepaway camp and i should not have i was terribly introverted and self conscious some people think well send them away maybe that will bring them out of their shell maybe there is a reason they are in a shell and the parents should work on that at home before sending there child off to a place that can be very scary.

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