Sefer for a Couple to Learn?

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  • #605281

    Caterwauler
    Member

    My wife and I made a Kabalah over Yamim Noraim to begin learning together once a week for 30-45 minutes. Married 10+ years with B”AH a beautiful handful of kids and both working, so as many of you know, not as easy as it sounds! Now I need ideas for a Sefer for us to learn together… We have strong Yeshiva/Seminary backgrounds. It can be Mussar, Hashkafa, Parsha related, etc. Would like a sefer in hebrew as opposed to english. (We’re already doing Shmiras Halashon Yomi and Hilchos Shabbos at the Shabbos table.) As an example Michtav Meeliyahu would be perfect, but we wanted somethng new (to us).

    Serious suggestions will be much appreciated!

    #900275

    gavra_at_work
    Participant

    Medrash Rabba on the Parsha

    #900276

    Feif Un
    Participant

    Ish Ha-Halakha by R’ Soloveitchik

    #900277

    WIY
    Member

    Great idea. Btw you both covered the whole Michtav Meeliyahu already? Theres a lot there so even if you did parts of it, everything he says is essential.

    Maybe learn Mesilas Yesharim together?

    #900278

    BaalHabooze
    Participant

    R’ Shlomo Wolbe’s seforim on chinuch are fantastic, and a classic.

    #900279

    RabbiRabin
    Member

    Rav Pinkus’ seforim are phenomenal. Specifically Shabbos Malkesah (which will give you a completely refreshing look at Shabbos) and many other seforim that have been rewritten from his shiurim.

    #900280

    bp27
    Participant

    I think any of R’ Shimshon Pincus ZT”l’s seforim would be perfect

    #900281

    leeboh boh’ee
    Participant

    the amazing rebbetzin kanievsky a’h, used to recommend learning 2 halachos of loshon horo every day. a big segulah! ( the sefer ” praying with fire ” is also excellent !

    #900282

    SaysMe
    Member

    nesivos shalom al hachinuch or al haparshah perhaps

    #900283

    flyer
    Participant

    A sefer on tefilla might be nice – r’ pinkus’s sefer on tefilla is amazing.

    #900284

    bubka
    Participant

    Oz Vehadar Levusha (Rav Pesach Eliyahu Falk)

    #900285

    Nothing beats Pele Yoetz! Best sefer I know for this purpose.

    Another candidate could be Derech Hashem, but my first choice for this is Pele Yoetz. Short, very interesting pieces about all kinds of subjects.

    #900286

    Feif Un
    Participant

    bubka: They want to grow in Judaism, not be scared off.

    #900287

    @bubka,

    Doesn’t Oz Vehadar Levusha have a haskama from Rav Bin Laden?

    #900288

    bubka
    Participant

    @crisisoftheweek: No.

    J.B.’s book, that Feif referenced up above, must have that haskama.

    #900289

    Matan1
    Participant

    bubka

    If by “J.B” you mean Hagoan Harav Yoshe Ber Soloveichik ztl, than no.

    #900290

    Whiteberry
    Member

    Kitsur shulchan aruch

    #900291

    just my hapence
    Participant

    bubka – presumably you’ve heard of Harav Arvrohom Gurvitz shlit’a, Rosh Yeshivas Beis Yosef D’Gateshead (otherwise known as Gateshead Yeshiva) who once told a friend of mine “he’s not J. B., he’s R’ Yoshe Ber MiBoston”. I take it he’s charedi enough for you…

    Personally, my wife and I learn shmiras shabbos k’hilchoso.

    #900292

    gavra_at_work
    Participant

    Oz Vehadar Levusha (Rav Pesach Eliyahu Falk)

    Joseph: If I were cynical, I would say that the OP asked to learn a Sefer. If I were cynical. 🙂

    #900293

    YW Moderator-42
    Moderator

    Mesilas Yisharim, Mishna Brura,

    or Daf Yomi with Rashi, Tosfos, and Maharsha

    #900294

    Feif Un
    Participant

    bubka: I know that my Rosh Yeshiva told me that Oz Vehadar Levusha is good for scaring girls away from the mitzva of tznius, and he doesn’t recommend it to anyone.

    He also once told my brother that although he doesn’t necessarily agree with R’ Soloveitchik’s hashkafos, he was still a huge talmud chacham and a gadol, and he has a tremendous amount of respect for him. He once heard a bachur in the yeshiva refer to him as JB, and he blew up at him for his lack of respect.

    #900295

    Mimk
    Member

    “bubka: I know that my Rosh Yeshiva told me that Oz Vehadar Levusha is good for scaring girls away from the mitzva of tznius, and he doesn’t recommend it to anyone”

    Chas V’shalom. R’ Falk is tremendous person, how can you have the downright chutzpah of saying that?? The sefer is a great eye opener which covers all aspects of tznius, machsava and l’maaseh.

    #900296

    Caterwauler
    Member

    Thank you for all the excellent suggestions so far- I’ll definitely use one of them. Esp. thinking about Pele Yoetz or R’ Pincus- shabbos or tefilah. Didn’t mean to start a debate on which people and sefarim are acceptable tho- let’s keep it positive!

    #900297

    bubka
    Participant

    Feif: My Rosh Yeshiva told me that Oz Vehadar should be read by every girl in high school and should be given to every Choson and Kallah.

    As far as JB, he was often referred to, even by Rabbonim and Roshei Yeshiva, by “J.B.”, including Rav Schenur Kotler and even by a Rosh Yeshiva from YU (Rav Gorelick).

    #900298

    Feif Un
    Participant

    Mimk: It wasn’t my words, it was my Rosh Yeshiva who said it. He is a well known and respected Rosh Yeshiva. He told me it contains every chumrah known in tznius and presents it as basic halachah. He said it’s only good for scaring people away.

    I was told that even R’ Falk (who I have no doubt is a tremendous talmud chacham) wrote that the standards are intended for his community, and not meant to provide standards for other areas. His community is known to be far more machmir than almost any area outside of certain parts of Israel.

    #900299

    WIY
    Member

    CAterwauler

    I have learned many parts of Pele Yoetz and I dont recommend it. It has some very scathing mussar in there and it is not for the faint of heart. I would say you are way better off with Rav Pinkus.

    #900300

    Caterwauler
    Member

    WIY- Thanks for the info; i do want to keep it upbeat for best chance of sticking w/it. BTW you mentioned about Michtav meeliyahu- totaly agree that everything is essential, but we learned MM weekly when we were first married for over a year (and I still learn it on my own) and just looking for something new this time around. Thanks again!

    PS- another interesting suggestiion someone local (we live in Baltimore) gave me was Alei Shur. I’ve seen bits and pieces but never really went through it. we’ll see- I have until Sunday to choose!

    #900301

    Whiteberry
    Member

    I’m not of the stature of those who alledgedly called Rav Soleveitchik Z’l, “JB” and I won’t ever do so. In my mind it is every bit as insulting, chustpadik and a bizayon hatorah for someone like me to call him JB as it would be to refer to Rav Elyashiv Z’l as Joey. I don’t think anyone reading this is of such a stature either that they should do so as well. It is also the same insult, chutzpah and bizayon hatorah to knock Rav Falk or his sefer. Disagreeing with the hashkafos or psak of someone is one thing, insulting them or their work is quite another.

    I think a seder in mesilas yesharim, followed up by one in orchos tzadikim and shmiras halashon is in order for some people.

    #900302

    OneOfMany
    Participant

    Sefer Hachinuch is a good sefer to learn – not too heavy or scathing. Sefer Kuzari is also interesting (if you are into stuff like that.)

    #900303

    WIY
    Member

    Caterwauler

    Another good suggestion I thought of is the Sefer mitzvos Hakatzer by the chofetz chaim. He lists the 77 mitzvos Asei and 194 mitzvos lo sasei applicable today and gives an explanation of each one. I went through it. Very essential sefer in my opinion that will boost your appreciation for mitzvos and clarify for you what the actual mitzvos are. Read more here if the mods let this through.

    http://revach.net/lists/article.php?id=39

    #900304

    moi aussi
    Member

    The Garden of Emuna, by Rabbi Shalom Arush

    #900305

    yehudayona
    Participant

    This clearly doesn’t belong in this topic, but since WIY gave a link to the Chofetz Chaim’s list of mitzvos that apply today…

    He lists yibum and chalitza as two mitzvos. Does anyone in any community practice yibum today?

    #900306

    Think first
    Member

    Yehudayona- the chofetz Chaim lists all mitzva that we can do while in galus without a Bais hamikdosh. Yes , you can do yibum without a Bais hamikdosh, but you can’t bring bikkurim. Now it’s true that the minhag is that we choose Chalitza instead if yibum today and honestly I’m not sure how long that goes back however the point is thats it’s doable in galus.

    Careful how you speak about a gadol hador!

    #900307

    sushee
    Member

    Yehuda: Yes. Sephardim do practice yibum today.

    #900308

    Circle
    Participant

    Pele Yoetz is fantastic, as is Sharai Tefilla by Rav Pincus.

    How about Chumash with Rashi slowly?

    #900309

    Mimk
    Member

    Sefer Tomer Devorah. Its a great sefer, teaches about middos. Great for a couple to learn since middos are the most important thing in a marriage.

    #900310

    WIY
    Member

    Mimk

    Good idea but parts of it are a little esoteric involving kabbalistic concepts so without a perush you can get left not understanding it. For something learned once a week its better to learn something simple with easy reading that wont get bogged down.

    #900311

    AZOI.IS
    Participant

    What Sefer/Book is recommended in English (other than Hilchos Lashon Hara)?

    #900312

    Whiteberry
    Member

    Anything from rabbi miller.

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