shabbos seudah with kids

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  • #597822
    shmeril
    Member

    I’M looking for ideas how to entertain young children 3-4-5 yr olds by the shaboss table any good story book also kid songs that they’ll enjoy

    thanks

    #783940
    bombmaniac
    Participant

    regular zemiros? books…little medrash says? choose simpler tunes for your zemiros nothing too complex.

    #783941
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    Koh Asu Chachameinu — in English titled “Our Sages Showed The Way.” I can’t remember the author’s name off the top of my head.

    The Wolf

    #783942
    Imaofthree
    Participant

    Torah Rhymes and Riddles is a cute book, keeps the kids interested.

    #783943
    shmeril
    Member

    not zemiros nice english songs

    #783944
    bombmaniac
    Participant

    just one shabbos?

    #783945
    deiyezooger
    Member

    “not zemiros nice english songs”

    I found that songs in the kids native language (in my case Yidish) is much easier to teach then with hebrew words they dont yet understand.

    #783946
    gavra_at_work
    Participant

    Candy for singing the loudest

    #783947
    good.jew
    Member

    Just let them play with their toys

    #783948
    bpt
    Participant

    Break time is crucial. Tell them if they sit nice thru <the fish, the next zemira, ect> they can go away from the table for 10 minutes.

    Our seudos take upwards of 2 hours, but there is no stress and no fidgeting.

    (No telling how the DILs will adapt to the 2hr meal, but we’ll skin that cat when we get to it)

    #783949
    TheGoq
    Participant

    I agree with u bpt when i was growing up we had the fish the soup and then the family retired to the living room for about a half hour this was especially true in the winter. Also i grew up without zemiros and i feel like i really missed out.

    #783950
    bpt
    Participant

    ” Also i grew up without zemiros and i feel like i really missed out. “

    So did I. And to fill in the years that I missed, I got a hold of a few tapes, learned the ones that appealed to me, and started a new me.

    And no, it does not need to be 4 person harmonies. Sing like you mean it, and enjoy the knowledge that the Boreh Olam is loving every note you belt out.

    #783951
    Torah4Life
    Member

    This is definitely a struggle, but it’s a very choshuv zach to make it geshmak for the kids. We usually reserve a few minutes for asking parsha questions and I try to sing the same zemiros every week so they start to learn the tunes. Other than that, they just play. It depends on their ages…and don’t pressure them too much.

    #783952
    s2021
    Member

    English songs r a good idea. Especially the Parsha/Shabos/Yom Tov songs they learn by Morah. Do motions like in girls camps! (So fun- I still crack up from them..)

    #783953
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    I’M looking for ideas how to entertain young children 3-4-5 yr olds by the shaboss table any good story book also kid songs that they’ll enjoy

    Why? I say let them go to the other room and play/fight.

    #783954
    s2021
    Member

    P- So u see no point 2 a parent makin an effort to include his kids at the shabbos table?

    #783955
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    s:

    Ok, you’re correct.

    I guess I’m overreacting to parents who insist their kids stay by the table, even though kids should clearly not be staying there more than a few minutes.

    #783956
    deiyezooger
    Member

    i think once a week shabbos, a family may and should sacrifice themselves to have their family sitting together at the table and eating and singing and enjoying the togetherness, it’s beautiful. why should they leave the table to go play/fight? every kid likes family time, and shabbos is the time a child could and should get it.if not then, then when?

    good luck to everyone out there trying to entertain their family on shabbos, if you make it fun, it will be fun, for them for sure. it’s easy to pleese the “little ones”.

    #783957
    s2021
    Member

    P- yeah thats nuts.. Most adults I know cant stay at the table too long b4 escaping to the couch or the bathroom with the Mishpachah.. 🙂

    #783958
    good.jew
    Member

    Why are you trying to get a 3 year old to stay at the table… that is ridiculous

    #783959
    s2021
    Member

    dz- little kids arent capable of sitting for so long.. certainly not by adult conversation. Theres a reason Preschool only has 20 minute MAXIMUM circle time..

    #783960
    a mamin
    Participant

    everything has to do with how you bring them up. Shabbos is supposed to be family time and yes sometimes its hard for little kids to sit so long by a table but it can be done1

    ! My married children all have very fond memories of our Shabbos seudas and never felt they were missing out on anything. btw our Shabbos seudas are at least an hour.

    #783961
    shmeril
    Member

    thanks for all the responses

    I dont make my children sit by the the table.I just try to make it enjoyable for them.

    they love singing songs and hearing stories at the table so I’m looking for ideas.

    if anyone knows kids school songs or where i could get hold of them would be greatly appreciated

    #783962
    shmeril
    Member

    and to those that write leave the little kids alone you should try it and you and your kids will have a beautiful seudah

    #783963
    m in Israel
    Member

    I don’t get all the comments against making kids sit “so long”. Shmeril did not give any time frame — maybe his kids are at the table for 5 minutes and he wants to make the most of that time. Even very young kids will enjoy a few minutes of hearing a story from their parents or singing the songs they learned it school — the Shabbos table doesn’t have to be only for adults! (Obviously it is never good chinuch to expect your kids to behave in a developmentally inappropriate way — but it is possible to make at least some of the seudah geared to the kids, and then let them go play while you do the “adult” diverei torah and conversation.)

    shmeril — For English Parsha songs the golden classics are the 613 Torah Avenue series. You can get them in any Judaica store in CD, and some of the volumes are also made into videos. There is a tape for each Sefer of Chumash, with a song for each Parsha (and some cutesy dialog in between). The songs are great for 4 and 5 years olds (may be a bit complex for a 3 year old). You can also ask any preschool morah for song ideas.

    The Little Medrash Says is for older kids (more like 8 — 12 year olds), but they have a series called “My First Parsha Reader” which would probably be appropriate/

    #783964
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    I thought about it.

    shmeril: You ask how you can “entertain” your kids at the shabbos table. That sounds as if you think they need to be there, so you want to know how to get them to stop screaming while they are there.

    The answer to that is they only need to be there inasmuch as they gain from it- which is only a few minutes. Then forget entertainment, just let them leave and play.

    You might also ask what you can do to make the few minutes they can handle more meaningful. What songs you can sing, etc.

    The answer to that is to make it pleasant, don’t fight with your wife, and just sing regular shabbos zmiros with them. Show them that shabbos is meaningful to you, by making it meaningful to you.

    #783965
    aries2756
    Participant

    Who knows one. That is a great song for little kids.

    #783966
    m in Israel
    Member

    Aries — “Who know one?” is a lot of of fun to sing, as are all the rest of the Uncle Moishy songs, especially the earlier ones.

    PBA — I better understand your comment now that I see how you understood the word “entertain.” I did not get the impression that “entertain” meant “get them to stop screaming”. I understood the question as to how to involve and excite your kids during the meal. I personally think this is a great question that more parents should be asking. It bothers me when the bulk of a Shabbos meal is geared only to adults, so that the kids can only last a few minutes. I firmly believe that a Shabbos meal can be structured in a way that even young kids can participate for more than a few minutes (although I agree that 20 minutes for a preschooler is probably the max, not counting eating time.) Why is your approach to “forget entertainment”? What is wrong with coming up with entertaining and meaningful activities such as stories and songs as described by the OP?

    I remember a young family I used to eat meals by when I was in seminary who had a ton of guests, and their policy was they only had guests one meal each Shabbos (barring emergencies), and the other meal they kept family only so they could gear the meal towards their young kids. Personally I think that is a beautiful concept.

    #783967
    m in Israel
    Member

    Some more ideas:

    Pick one zemer from the zemiros of each meal and sing that same zemer with your kids every week. That way it’s easier for them to learn it then if it’s a different song each week, and they don’t get bored like they would if you try to get them to sing a whole bunch of zemiros in Hebrew. (We do this even with my slightly older kids, and it works well.)

    Ask questions about topics they have learned about in school — Parsha, upcoming holidays, etc., and give out small treats (like chocolate chips) for each answer.

    Let them bring the projects they made during the week to the table and explain them, or give each child a chance to say something exciting that happened to them that week.

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