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someone help me out here i have been wondering about this for a long time . I always hear the boys have long lists and the girls have no dates. so who pray tell are on the lists? who are these boys dating? maybe it is just because we automatically go first to the boys side that it seems the boys have lists while the girls have none? but remember every time a boy goes out, a girl had a date!
Yeah, but there is one guy out there dating hundreds of girls. And while hundreds of girls indeed got a date… it was all with the same guy. And only one of them can get married to him.
No, don’t you get it? The other guys are dating dozens of girls too. There are so many more girls in the market that even if each girl (in the market) gets only one date, each guy (in the market) still gets dozens.
import more boys from Poland. That’s what they did in my grandfather’s time.
the girls do not get tonz of dates! the guys have a ton of names and after looking into them they get 3/4 off the list and then go out with the others. so the girls might be on his list but they are not dating!
adorable,
did you settle for someone different than you before you got engaged (i.e. OOT, ur litvish he’s a chosid, ur ashkenazi he’s sfardi, etc?)
it wouldn’t work,
the gemara says it’s the way of a man to go after women and not vice versa,
the man is always going to be looking for the woman. The velt wouldn’t go for it b/c it would be a lack of tznius on the girl’s part
There is no lack of tznius for a girl to check a prospective shidduch out, prior to accepting a date, if she so desires. What makes his side more choshuv than hers?
Why should girl accept a date before she/her parents checked a prospective shidduch out?
It is not a numbers game.
There are more good girls than boys.
Girls have less of a selection to choose from than boys.
coffee addict why is getting an oot er “settling” for something different than you?
coffee addict, where is the lack of tzneyius in having a girl check out prospective husbands? (especially since most probably it would be her parents anyway)
I already quoted the gemara (It’s not a woman thing to go looking for a man, that in and of itself makes it untznius)
coffee addict why is getting an oot er “settling” for something different than you?
adorable considers herself a NYer
there are numerous NYers that don’t want to marry OOTers (different mentality), and if she marries an OOTer than people ask “there are a lot of NYers why did she settle for an OOTer maybe theres something wrong with her?” I’ve heard it before
“there are numerous NYers that don’t want to marry OOTers (different mentality), and if she marries an OOTer than people ask “there are a lot of NYers why did she settle for an OOTer maybe theres something wrong with her?” I’ve heard it before”
I’m a New Yawker and was told by a friend that she thinks it’s my type to marry an OOTer. So is there “something wrong” with me? Why do people have to make an already complicated process even MORE complicated? We should all be happy for each other 🙂
No offense to you, coffee addict. You’re just relaying what you hear.
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