The Other Side- Stories About Mechanchim

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    In response to

    What did a teacher/Rebbe ever do for you that showed how special they are and made a strong impression on you?

    I remember once having a very hard day a teacher asked me (during class- a little embarrasing) if everything was ok and (IIRC) told me I could leave if I wanted. As I was leaving after class, she told me to take it easy. She is very busy with many things and it meant a lot that twice she cared enough and took the time to do something she didn’t need to.



    A young new Rabbi in school regularly took a wayward teenager to one side and told him he was “a good boy who had a lot to give – come on I believe in you !” At the time this boy was going through a lot and had no one to confide in. As other parents and some kids avoided this boy as a bad influence, this special Rabbi made this young man feel worthwhile and after a while his kindness paid off. That boy calmed down, graduated and is now a credit to his family . That young new Rabbi didn’t just affect the boy he affected the attitudes of the kids and parents around him, so amazing to watch. I say this as one of those disapproving parents who realised how wrong I was!


    A little boy (about 5 or 6) lost his father a few years ago. His rebbe decided to just at random times go and play ball with him and things like that because he realized there is no father and all the siblings are older and many married. No1 asked the rebbe to do it, he just realized that a small thing like ball can go a very long way!


    btw happiest it really is good having you back 🙂

    i had an excellent rebbi in 12th grade who helped me sort through a bunch of issues i had during high school. he understood my problems and tried as best he could to make 12th grade bearable. i really must give him credit…i was NOT an easy student to deal with

    also my 12th grade english teacher for giving me everything i needed to enable me to write as i do today


    One of my high school Rabbis made my shidduch. After 9th grade, he moved and got a job teaching at my husband’s school, where he ended up teaching him in 11th and 12th grade. We were both still in touch with him when I came back from seminary (1 year out of high school for me, 3 years for my husband), and he suggested we go out. The rest, as they say, is history 🙂

    Seriously, though, I only had him in 9th grade, but the reason I was still in touch with him 4 years later- and the reason he knew me well enough that he could suggest a shidduch- was that he was that special as a teacher and had that much of an impact.


    Mechanchim have the same problem as sports coaches do.

    When the kids do well, it’s because of the family life or the parents or maybe even the child him/her self

    When the kids show the slightest disinterest regarding anything having to do with “the yeshiva world” all of the sudden the teachers get blamed that they arent “selling yiddishkeit” the right way or are intentionally harming the child.

    There is an old saying that “Players win games and coaches lose them.” So while I sympithize with Mechanchim and realize that they are in an untennable situation. They should go into teaching knowing that you are under a microscope and are the manifestation of what the parents of a child are spending their retirement savings on. If you can properly understand that responsibilty and still want to work under those conditions then good for you.

    If you are going into teaching because you dont want to get a job outside of the “system” then all you are doing is stealing from that parent/child.

    Maybe if there was a school where the teachers/administration all felt and acted that way, I would feel better about going into debt for Jewish Education. But right now, I’ll take my chances


    Thanks for starting this thread, aldough I had alot to say about some inconpetent mechanchim on the other thread, we need to appriciate the mejarity of them who give their all for our kids.

    am yisrael chai


    Great thread.


    Abba bar Aristotle

    Clever; I have been trying for years to make such a yeshiva. No money, honey.



    You tried to make a Yeshiva and you were only to employ people cut out for/enthusiastic about Chinuch?

    And you couldn’t raise enough money for it?

    Well Kudos to you for trying. I hope you are successful one day.

    Do you think I’m too cynical for posting what I did?

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