There has to be a better way
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- This topic has 13 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 9 years ago by To be or not to be.
June 9, 2014 1:27 am at 1:27 am #612960heywhynotMember
I was told by a shadchan/rav that most guys decide within 60
Seconds of meeting a girl whether or not they like them;
If a large percentage of the time the guy will decide almost instantly
That he doesn’t like her, why go through with the entire date? Obviously
It would be very disrespectful to just meet her on a date for a minute and then
Walk away, but there has to be some sort of way where we don’t make
Both sides waste hours of their time for nothing??June 9, 2014 1:29 am at 1:29 am #1019034PulsingFlowerMember
Because it is not true.June 9, 2014 1:40 am at 1:40 am #1019035popa_bar_abbaParticipant
Because the women will be insulted and embarressed if the guy takes a look, says “you’re ugly”, and walks out.
That’s why.June 9, 2014 1:56 am at 1:56 am #1019036To be or not to beMember
don’t know who “most guys” are but from my experience as a guy tells me that even if they have a bad first impression if the first date goes well they will change their mindsJune 9, 2014 2:12 am at 2:12 am #1019037☕ DaasYochid ☕Participant
there has to be some sort of way
The CR already came out against pictures.
Popa is right, of course, and besides the ma’alah of acting like a mentch, there’s a side benefit of continuing the date in a normal manner; many a successful shidduch has come about because he (or she) reconsidered their first impression.June 9, 2014 2:12 am at 2:12 am #1019038heywhynotMember
Why isn’t speed dating more widely used?June 9, 2014 2:18 am at 2:18 am #1019039sk8ergirlMember
If looks mean so much to u, u can technically go to their shul and ask someone to point them out, or stalk them in some other area you know they frequent. And if u wanna make small talk with them, set up a kosher bagel stand in their college and wait for them to come buy one.June 9, 2014 2:34 am at 2:34 am #1019040TheGoqParticipant
Women do the same thing ive been on many dates that were over within 60 seconds.June 9, 2014 2:49 am at 2:49 am #1019041popa_bar_abbaParticipant
Agreed with the Goq. Women do the same thing. And as bad as it is when we realize it, it would be worse if they turned around and went back up the stairs calling “forget it” over their shoulder.June 9, 2014 2:58 pm at 2:58 pm #1019042cherrybimParticipant
Unfortunately, their marriages last just as long.
So smart, yet so stupid.
Find a mate who is a yiras shamayim and look no further. You will have a good marriage.June 9, 2014 3:33 pm at 3:33 pm #1019043yehudayonaParticipant
cherrybim, a 60-second marriage? I can image it: “Ladies and Gentlemen, for the very last time, Mr. and Mrs. Shmerel Goldbergstein.”June 9, 2014 3:40 pm at 3:40 pm #1019044👑RebYidd23Participant
It builds character if a man has sat through long, boring dates and survived them. It also helps a man appreciate his wife if he chose her for a reason.June 9, 2014 4:35 pm at 4:35 pm #1019045dial427436Member
I had a rebbe who told me that unless you going to vomit when you see her you should still go out with her another time lol.June 10, 2014 1:45 am at 1:45 am #1019046To be or not to beMember
I vomited ON her. so she should say no
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