Why Is It So Hard?

Home Coffeeroom Shidduchim Why Is It So Hard?

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  • #1676659

    daascochmabinah
    Participant

    When I was in my senior year in high school, I couldn’t understand why girls were starting to get nervous about shidduchim/getting married. After all, we were a bunch of 17/18 year old girls with our entire lives ahead of us. Some would go to seminary, some would be attending college, and some would begin their dating soon-to-be married lives. Now I am 21 turning 22, and while I realize that I am still young, I want to understand why it is so hard to find the one. I’m smart, attractive, funny and college educated. I come from a MoDox background with a Yeshivish influence. This means, I could technicality have my pick in terms of how I want to approach dating, shidduchim, meeting someone on my own etc. Many people question why I am still single- making up some of the most hurtful & ridiculous rumors. If one of the main events in life is marriage- why is dating so hard? and why is it so difficult to actually find someone to seal the deal with?

    #1676799

    avocado
    Participant

    daas- firstly, I got married when I was 22, almost 23. So there’s hope 🙂
    Also, I couldn’t help but notice your post on the thread about pictures and shidduchim- you might be passing up your bashert that way. Boys are VERY DIFFERENT in real life. Trust me! I know this from my own experience.
    A boy that you would find very attractive in real life might not be photogenic.
    If you hear good things about the boy, just go out. Don’t ask for a picture.
    That being said, I agree that shidduchim is very hard for single girls in today’s gen. I know lots of nice girls who are 23, 24, 25 and older. It has nothing to do with you personally! It’s the curse of today’s generation and Hashem is the only One Who decides when each person gets married.
    Just keep davening to Him and iy’h you should find the right one in the right time.
    I hope to hear good news from you soon.

    #1676804

    Joseph
    Participant

    How often do you say no to the boys?

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