Women who drink on a date

Home Forums Decaffeinated Coffee Women who drink on a date

Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 64 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #597064

    There is a discussion about a man on a date ordering a beer…what would you do if a women ordered one?

    #770923
    Pac-Man
    Member

    I would drive her home immediately and wish her the best of luck on her future.

    #770924
    mewho
    Participant

    please keep in mind it could be for lactating purposes.

    i have heard some say that when women are nursing, if they have difficulties , sometimes beer helps.

    i haven’t figured out if the beer helps produce the milk or helps de stress the mother.

    so the next time you see a woman downing a beer, think to yourself, perhaps she is a nursing mother not just a lush.

    #770925
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    I don’t know. Eeees and I drank on every date that we went on… both before and after we were married.

    The Wolf

    #770926
    bpt
    Participant

    Same thing I would say about a boy who drinks alchohol in a non-mitzvah setting. (Mitzva setting being a Shabbos kiddush, a vort, ect)

    It speaks volumes about the person, and would be (for me at least) a serious bellwether.

    To be fair, the poor kids might just not be bright enough to know what they just did was wrong, so I would reveal the reason you are dropping the date (if you choose to do so).

    It might be a wake-up call for the offender.

    #770927

    Ask her out on a second date

    #770928
    boredinoffice
    Participant

    nothing wrong with drinking in moderation

    #770929
    aries2756
    Participant

    I imagine that would depend on the age of the couple dating and the environment they are in. If it is a young couple, I would be very wary of it.

    #770930
    um
    Member

    i would order one too. 🙂

    #770931
    aries2756
    Participant

    mewho, seriously if she is nursing why would she be on a date?

    #770932
    mewho
    Participant

    aries, thank you for picking up on that.

    tho in actuallity, i do know of a nice young lady who got married, got pregnant, left husband while pregnant and divorced all within one year. if she is nursing she could fit my post.

    #770933
    Pac-Man
    Member

    aries: You were dead-set against men drinking on a date (in the other thread), and yet here you are more open-minded about a woman downing a beer? Shocking!

    #770934

    I would be fine with it, my judgement would be based on the type of beer she ordered as opposed to the drink itself. If she ordered just a Budweiser I would not be impressed. If she ordered something a bit more exotic like a Guinness, I would be intrigued…

    #770935
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    I don’t know. Eeees and I drank on every date that we went on… both before and after we were married.

    We’re not discussing soft drinks.

    #770936
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    We’re not discussing soft drinks.

    My apologies then.

    The Wolf

    #770937
    bpt
    Participant

    ” I would be intrigued… “

    Now that you mention it, details DO matter.

    Did she also order a beer chaser? Maybe there’s some redeeming factor in this after all!

    #770938
    tryinghard
    Member

    I would rather look at “how” she/he drank the beer. What difference does it make if it’s beer or water. Some people, myself included, can’t drink water. This being the case, why may I not have a drink of beer instead?

    #770939
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    My apologies then.

    Why? You gave me a smile.

    #770940
    bpt
    Participant

    “how” she/he drank the beer”

    Good point!

    Was it chugged from the bottle? Tells you something.

    Was is sipped thru a straw? Tells you something else!

    #770941
    cherrybim
    Participant

    Sages in the Talmud are recorded to have had beer and wine as the drink of the day; and I don’t think them women drank diet coke.

    #770942
    adorable
    Participant

    if i was a guy and a girl ordered beer on a date I would ask her for the fastest route to get her home.

    #770943

    “if i was a guy and a girl ordered beer on a date I would ask her for the fastest route to get her home.

    hopes she’s not too drunk to tell you

    #770944
    Pac-Man
    Member

    Sages in the Talmud are recorded to have had beer and wine as the drink of the day; and I don’t think them women drank diet coke.

    The women drank the diet coke of the day, just as you posited that the men drank the beer of the day.

    #770945
    adorable
    Participant

    mike- LOL good line… I would ask her father to come get her as soon as possible!

    #770946
    mewho
    Participant

    did she order ”lite”beer or regular?

    if its regular prepare for a beer belly.

    same for the men!

    #770947
    yeshivabochur123
    Participant

    Reminds me of a funny story. Once I went on a shidduch to a hotel lobby. Apparently you were not allowed to sit in the lobby unless you were a guest of the hotel or ordering an alcoholic drink. Someone came over to tell us that. We were an hour in so it was to early to end the date and I didn’t feel like going anywhere else so I ordered a drink. The girl asked what it tasted like and long story short I got her one too. Then she got really drunk off one shot! Bad idea. That was our last time.

    #770948
    adorable
    Participant

    yb- omg hysterical! thank you

    #770949
    mewho
    Participant

    last time drinking?

    last time dating?

    last time at the hotel?

    #770950
    bpt
    Participant

    So I guess there’s more to your “123” suffix than we originaly thought!

    #770951
    dunno
    Member

    yeshivabochur123

    Did that really happen?? Hilarious!

    #770952
    Pac-Man
    Member

    yb123: How’d she act when drunk?

    #770953
    cherrybim
    Participant

    “The women drank the diet coke of the day, just as you posited that the men drank the beer of the day.’

    #770955
    bpt
    Participant

    Find me a woman that likes any of the above, and I’ll show you woman who can drink like a guy.

    #770956
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    Find me a woman that likes any of the above, and I’ll show you woman who can drink like a guy.

    My wife likes cholent, and she doesn’t drink. Then again, from that list, I only like cholent too and I don’t really drink either.

    The Wolf

    #770957
    yeshivabochur123
    Participant

    she started giggling a lot told me some interesting stories and then threw up. Actually she was more interesting and fun when she was drunk. She then said no to a third date. I figured she would. Also to clarify the hotel lobby was also the bar (I didn’t know this as the bar was on the other side of the room) that’s why you had to buy a drink. But this date is nothing compared to my first shidduch date ever (not with this girl) where the shadchan called me to tell me the father wants to talk with me. I said fine. The father called me up after to tell me what a bad impression I made. He said “I didn’t know it was possible to make such a bad impression”. He then gave me some really good pointers and I put them down in a notebook. well you live and learn. Still looking.

    #770958
    essy8
    Member

    is it true that a woman halachically needs her father/husband’s reshus to drink an alcoholic drink in public? vague recollection of learning something like that in high school…

    #770959
    shlishi
    Member

    essy8: It isn’t tznius altogether. Even a father/husband can’t authorize public drinking by a woman.

    #770960
    ItcheSrulik
    Member

    It all depends on the setting. If her drinking shows she’s irresponsible such as if she’s driving (yes, it is possible) or somewhere where you just don’t do it like any public property, where it’s illegal, that would be an automatic “no.” Otherwise, it’s up to how she drinks (moderately is ok, 3 boiler makers is NOT) and how far she lets herself go (the less the better, obviously).

    #770961
    oomis
    Participant

    If I were having dinner and it was a glass of wine, I would not think of it in the same way as tossing back a beer or a scotch on the rocks. I don’t think it is a smart move for either boy or girl to order alcoholic beverages, but to each his own.

    #770962
    cherrybim
    Participant
    #770963

    your logic is interesting

    i dont believe however that Chazal made a gzeirah against every behavior that they thought wasnt ok.

    #770964
    bpt
    Participant

    “…and she doesn’t drink. …..I don’t really drink either.”

    But you (and presumably, mrs Wolf as well) COULD if you needed to, and most likely hold your senses.

    Cholent does that to a person.

    #770965
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    I don’t think it is a smart move for either boy or girl to order alcoholic beverages, but to each his own.

    Why can’t he order a drink for her and vice-versa? 🙂

    #770966
    cherrybim
    Participant

    “i dont believe however that Chazal made a gzeirah against every behavior that they thought wasnt ok.”

    If they thought the general population couldn’t handle the g’zeira, they weren’t goizer. Sometimes they would float a trial balloon and if the people could handle the g’zeira, it remained; otherwise, the g’zeira was dropped. Same thing with Kol Korehs issued by chazal today; if the people can’t handle the g’zeira, the issue is dropped.

    #770967

    yes thats one reason they would not make a gezeirah but there are countless more

    did they make a gezeirah that someone shouldnt blow his nose onto the street in public? i happened to see that a few days ago.

    did they think that is okay.

    we know what they thought about people who ate while walking down the street. they are passul from aidus. did they make a gezeirah?

    ther must be literally millions of behaviors they did not think was okay but did not goizer.

    #770968

    i think its cool.send me her resume

    #770969
    cherrybim
    Participant

    Mod – If chazal expressed their feelings about a particular trait or behavior, then we know that it’s important and we can react accordingly; otherwise, like you sort of indicated, it’s a subjective opinion and chazal couldn’t care less about blowing your nose into the street. In fact, while I consider it quite disgusting, chazal felt it was ok as long as you rub your shoe over the phlegm.

    #770970

    i think were not understanding each other

    thats fine

    #770971
    am yisrael chai
    Participant

    “what would you do if a women ordered one?”

    It depends if I felt she was wasting my time 🙂

    #770972
    anon1m0us
    Participant

    B’h–My wife and I enjoy a nice scotch with herring every shabbos.

Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 64 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.