Yichud Gift for Kallah

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  • #610960
    thumbthrough
    Member

    Dear YWN Community,

    I’m wondering if you have any suggestions on a yichud room gift?

    My kallah just received a very nice pearl necklace and bracelet as an engagement gift that she will probably wear to the wedding so that’s out of the question.

    She’s kind of a tomboy. She almost never wears jewelry.

    Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!

    #1037864
    a mamin
    Participant

    Earrings or a watch.

    #1037865

    A bottle of Glenlivet 25 would probably be appreciated.

    #1037866
    Israeli Chareidi
    Participant

    How about a food processor or a mixer?

    #1037867
    Burnt Steak
    Participant

    Power tools. Every woman’s dream. Trust me I know!

    #1037868
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Sorry…no idea though….ummmmm……..a watch?!?!

    Maybe a fancy gold or silver (or wtvr u choose) pin….its tecnically not jewlery…though they arent IN…but maybe she’ll be the first to start the new craze!

    #1037869
    walton157
    Member

    @thumbthrough: Mazal Tov on your recent engagment. May you and your kallah have much nachas and be zocheh to build a Bayit Neaman B’Israel.

    You mention that your kallah is “kind of a tomboy”. This would lead me to believe that she enjoys (watching) sports. Perhaps tickets to her favorite sports team. I know, not “bridal” at all. But a gift is suppose to make the recipient happy. Or, you can ask your kallah what SHE would prefer. She’s getting married and old enough to make this kind of desicion.

    If possible, please let us know what the outcome is. This is a most interesting scenario.

    #1037870
    rebdoniel
    Member

    Jewelry would have been ideal, but obviously, this isn’t an option for you. Perhaps a watch would be appropriate.

    #1037871
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    Think outside the box.

    If she’s not into jewelery, then find something else. Who cares if it’s not “traditional.” Does she have a favorite classic book? Find a first edition of it. Does she enjoy hiking? Buy a nice pair of hiking boots.

    The point is this: choose a gift that will show your kallah that you thought about her and the type of gift that would please her, and that you’re willing to buck conventional standards for her.

    The Wolf

    #1037872
    TRUEBT
    Participant

    Don’t think outside the box.

    Buy her flowers, and pay the florist to deliver them to the Yichud room. That way you can be done with it quickly, so there’s one less thing to think about.

    #1037873
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    I think a watch is jewelry.

    #1037874

    What about a sign with your last name on it for the front door of your future home?

    #1037875
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    Buy her flowers, and pay the florist to deliver them to the Yichud room. That way you can be done with it quickly, so there’s one less thing to think about.

    I disagree with you here.

    When speaking to chossonim and kallos, I often tell them not to let the wedding drive them crazy. While it is an important day, it is only one day — one day out of the many that they will spend together for the rest of their lives. As important as it is, it’s still only one day — and it’s not worth spoiling the ones that follow just for that one day.

    However, when it comes to a gift for the yichud room, that’s something that she’s going to remember the rest of her life. As a result, you want that memory to be a good one for her in the years to come. So don’t just pick flowers because it’s expedient and “one less thing to think about.” Pick something that’s meaningful. Put more effort into her gift than you do into your suit, the choice of music or who gets which kibbud. Your suit will eventually be worn out, the music will be a passing fad and who got which kibbud will be unimportant in your future life.

    If she adores flowers, then by all means, get them. But don’t do it just because it’s easy. Go for meaningful over easy. You’ll win every time.

    The Wolf

    #1037876
    interjection
    Participant

    I’m kind of a tomboy too. I suggest either a watch or stud earrings. Mazal tov!

    #1037877
    Getzel
    Participant

    A set of ramban

    #1037878
    walton157
    Member

    @TRUEBT: The bride will have all the flowers she needs on her wedding day. What makes you think she wants more even from her husband of 10 minutes?

    “….one less thing to think about”? That’s the lazy man’s way out of a situation.

    #1037879
    walton157
    Member

    @insertusernamehere: Very classy and unique idea. Now comes the machlochet. In Hebrew or English….what does “Rashi say”?

    #1037880

    Golf clubs.

    #1037881
    sharp
    Member

    Mazal Tov, thumbthrough. May you build a BNB.

    If your Kallah doesn’t have an iPod yet, then that might be an option. You can load her favorite songs on there before you wrap it. You may also be able to engrave it with her name or a short message on the back. Although I’m not sure if that’s possible on the iPod. Perhaps you can check with an engraver. (It might be too thin)

    Another idea would be a nice pen with her name engraved on it.

    A watch may be considered jewelry but it serves a practical/ functional purpose and is not just ornamental.

    Also, a watch can look cute or fun if she doesn’t like a serious looking one so that may be something to consider.

    Maybe a nice pair of designer shades. She can never have too many.

    If your kallah appreciates flowers, you can get a nice vase and have it monogrammed.

    interjection mentioned stud earrings.

    Your Kallah will need earrings even if she is not the jewelry type.

    Those are a real classic and so versatile. I think you cannot go wrong with diamond studs.

    If you want to be on the safe side; you can ask her, but then you lose the element of surprise.

    #1037882
    Bookworm120
    Participant

    How about a book? Books are cool. And so are bow ties, but I suppose that’s more for a chosson than a tomboyish kallah. 😛

    #1037883
    popup
    Member

    During dating there might have been cute stories, jokes or what not that you shared. Get her something memorable that unique to both of you. or she might have mentioned something she enjoys. Take notes on what she likes, you’ll be busy doing that during your marriage as well. Mazel Tov!

    #1037884
    geshicked
    Member

    Oy…these posts are painful to read! Please pay them absolutely no heed. No girl wants flowers, sefarim or an iPod in the yichud room. If you were initially going to go the pearl route, then you obviously thought jewelry was the right way to go. Since she already got a pearl necklace and bracelet for the engagement, then get her earrings. I like the studs idea that was suggested on this thread. Or, if you want to stick with the pearl theme, then how about pearl and diamond stud earrings? A cool update on an otherwise traditional pearl but will still go with the other jewelry that she’ll be wearing that night. Tomboy or not, every girl likes pretty things. Some like flashier and some like simpler but for the yichud room, jewelry is your safest and most meaningful gift. Look how much thought you put into it already! May this be the beginning of a life filled with happy occasions. Mazel tov!

    #1037885
    from Long Island
    Participant

    This first gift from husband to wife will never be forgotten. It should be something she will always use and will never forget. It must be something personal.

    Being a tomboy does not mean she does not like “girly” things.Does she wear jewelry now? What kind? earrings or a bracelet Now is the time to ask her what were some of her favorite gifts she got in the past. That will point you in the right direction

    .Perhaps a new siddur or a set of machzerim. MOST important is the inscription. Your first really, really, personal message from husband to wife.

    Most young women will ALWAYS treasure the first gift their husbands give her !!

    #1037886
    from Long Island
    Participant

    Just had a thought, what about a beautiful piece of artwork showing the brocha for lechtbenching? It will always hang in your home and she will always think of you when she uses it.

    #1037887
    yehudayona
    Participant

    Wasn’t there another topic about gifts for the yichud room in which many people said the whole idea was ridiculous? I think young couples shouldn’t spend so much on luxuries, especially when many (most?) of them are planning to be partially supported by their parents for a while. Unfortunately, people have been hoodwinked into the idea that certain gifts are required. The only halachic requirement is a wedding ring.

    When my wife and I got engaged, I didn’t even get her a engagement ring. It wasn’t for lack of money, but because we thought it was unnecessary (and because at the time buying diamonds was tantamount to supporting apartheid). Years later, when she had a yen for a solitaire, she suggested CZ, which I was happy to get her.

    #1037888

    walton, I’m kind of a tomboy, and although I dont know this guys Kallah, it doesnt mean love watching sports even though I do. It means that you dont care about jewellery, and you dont spend hours in the mirrow, amd you dont love the colour pink. Basically it means really not girly.

    #1037889
    147
    Participant

    However, when it comes to a gift for the yichud room, that’s something that she’s going to remember the rest of her life.

    In my day & age they used to recommend giving a leather bound Siddur.

    But in light of the fact that a marriage is supposed to last for decades and one wishes this Yichud room gift to last along this lifetime, & being that I got married during the Omer, I modified this notion to a Shvu’os leather bound Machzor; Being only utilized 2 days a year, IY’H this gift shall last for life.

    #1037890
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    You can get an ipod engraved, my friend got hers for a birthday engraved in the back….

    #1037891
    rebdoniel
    Member

    I like the idea of a siddur; it demonstrates that you also care about your kallah’s spiritual development and religious growth, and depending on how mcuh your kallah actually cares about G-d and tefillah, she may really appreciate that.

    #1037892
    TRUEBT
    Participant

    I retract what I said. If the women out there say I’m wrong, then I’m wrong. Assuming her ears are pierced, then go with the stud pearl earrings since it will match her other jewelry.

    #1037893
    twisted
    Participant

    an emesdik tomboy? Maybe a 16gauge pump shotgun. If she is of big stature, a 12. If a redhead, keep the ammo wrapped separately. Just don’t get married in NYC. Mazal Tov, and besha’a tovah.

    #1037894
    🐵 ⌨ Gamanit
    Participant

    I wouldn’t recommend that you get earrings, simply because I’d assume she’ll already be wearing earrings. If she doesn’t change to the ones you give her it’s insulting to you, and if she does it’s insulting to whoever gave her those… Even a tomboy might like a fancy handbag or another accessory. The iPod idea can be presented well too. Depends on your Kallah.

    #1037895
    rebdoniel
    Member

    Do people really even iPads anymore? People use iPhones and Androids.

    #1037896
    Bookworm120
    Participant

    @from Long Island – Artwork sounds like a lovely idea.

    @Shopping – Really? An engraved iPod? Wowza. Now the question is, how does one make sure he gets the hint that that’s what you want? 😀

    #1037897

    A cookbook. Has some hilarious effects.

    #1037898
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Gamanit, I don’t think whoever gave her the earrings she wears to the wedding will be insulted if she switches to the pair her chosson gave her as a yichud gift.

    #1037899
    Randomex
    Member

    Don’t look up only as far as Gamanit’s post, people – go one higher:

    http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/yichud-gift-for-kallah#post-492943

    #1037900
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    A horse would be perfect for a tomboy, but is very difficult to give.

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