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Every situation must be handled according the merits of the individual case.
However, according to HaRav Dovid Cohen and other poskim:
*Children (even adult children)of abusive (sexual or physical)parents are exempt from communication. Based upon the effects of trauma caused to the individual by interaction. One need not receive a psychological diagnosis to determine their mental health is suffering due to the interaction.
*Children (even adult children)of verbally, or emotionally abusive parents are NOT exempt from communication, UNLESS they have a bonafide medical diagnosis. However, limitations should be worked out regarding the type and duration of interactions. There must be an exit strategy to avoid mental harm of the child.
*If a parent causes financial loss to a child, they are responsible for restitution. Kibbud Av does not give a free pass for parents to harm their children. Din Torah for financial loss are permitted.
Your original idea is brilliant in theory and paper ONLY.
*It would turn into hefkeirus and politics awfully quick. Look at Israel, the Ashkenazim don’t believe Sefardi schools should be supported, the majority of Israelis finds no use in yeshivish schools, and the yeshivish aren’t makir the needs of the Chassidim.
*What happens when the brilliant fundraisers give the moneys raised by the community for the community to one whopper donor’s investment firm to help raise extra revenue. This is ma’aseh bechol yom in Federation funding. This exposes our tzeddakah dollars to extreme risk.
*There will have to be EXTREME oversight, auditing and open accountability to the community it won’t happen.