Having lived both in NY and OOT, I see no justification for the inflated self-image of New Yorkers. There is, on the whole, more materialism and less openness among New Yorkers even though they consider themselves sophisticated.
Look to out-of-towners, and network widely. This may not come easily to some people.. but there are many hidden gems among boys – and girls – whose parents are not necessarily plugged in.
Try to find contacts in yeshivas or schools.