Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
“We need to abandon the attitude that makes a working Ben Torah into a second class citizen.”
I’ve seen many very well respected professionals who dedicated a significant number of years to learning in Kollel before persuing a parnassa and they now earn a respectable salary while giving regular shiurim in the community in areas such as Daf Yomi, Halacha L’Maaseh, Parshas HaShavua, Gemara Bekius and B’iyun and are not viewed with any sense of shame.
These “Talmidei Chachamim professionals”, including accountants, actuaries, financial advisors, and even doctors, precisely because they were serious in their learning during their Kollel years but also kept an eye on parnassa, developed the skills to be able to become Marbitzei Torah in their own right, and are currently looked at by others as models of self-sufficient (with the help of the RBSH”O of course) talmidei chachamim.
They prove this method can be successful!
While I was learning in Kollel 3 sedarim I used my bein hasedarim times (including Erev and Motzaei Shabbos) to take on-line courses and prepare for tests. When it came time to leave Kollel after a number of years I had the education to obtain a job and start supporting my family.
Perhaps we need to have advisors associated with the Kollelim that can advise individual Kollel members on how to start preparting for earning a parnassa during their down times in Kollel so that they are prepared and trained to find a job as soon as they leave Kollel. Why haven’t these advisors been established already, and what have Kollel yungeleit been doing with their bein hazemanim and bain hasedarim times?
Kollel yungerleit are smart, resourceful, proficient and trained to do do several things at one time and should be positioned to land some jobs that can provide serious parnassas!
W3DCB: You mentioned that the primary issue is that parents are expressing their expectations for their children outwardly so that the child who does not get into the most desired school feels like a failure since the parents conveyed to him he would be a failure if he was not accepted.
Bim’chilas Kavod Torascha, I beg to differ. As SY Rechnitz pointed out, I believe the problem is the parents’ attitude whether expressed explicitly to their child or not. How can a parent believe that his/her child is a failure if that child does not get into a certain school? All our children are the Ribbono Shel Olam’s children, and if he is not a good fit with the school you want him to attend, maybe his fit is with a different school that’s best for him, not what’s best for you. Perhaps his strengths lie somewhere else where he can also contribute posivitely to Klal Yisroel. It’s a parents’ job to imbue confidence in their children and to make them feel that they are special and beloved to the RBSH”O and that they have a unique way in which they can contribute to Klal Yisroel through their own unique Torah, Avodah and Gemilus Chasodim.