Ask the opposite gender

Home Forums Shidduchim Ask the opposite gender

Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 275 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #604043

    Brony
    Participant

    People of YWN,

    do you wonder what the OPPOSITE gender

    thinks about _______, but can’t ask because

    they won’t give you the time of day?

    WELL HERE’S YOUR CHANCE!!

    I’ll start:

    Esteemed ladies of YWN,

    what are your thought about a bro

    who rocks a COLORED shirt??

    not some crazy rainbow,

    just a normal two-tone pattern etc..

    assuming all else is what you’re looking for,

    is this a DEALBREAKER for you?

    #989253

    I’ll bet you 5 virtual dollars Popa’s going to answer a question aimed at the women.

    #989255

    🍫Syag Lchochma
    Participant

    I personally would feel a lot more comfortable with the colored shirt than with the way you asked the question. But I assume that was pretty deliberate.

    #989256

    MorahRach
    Member

    Not a deal breaker. My husband where’s colored shirts. Then again he likes sports which everyone on here believes is assur so what do I know!

    #989257

    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Make that 5 real dollars and you’ve got a deal.

    #989258

    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Brony:

    The question makes no sense. There is no such person.

    One of the features such a girl would be looking for is that cultural affiliation associated with wearing white shirts. Its like asking if you’d buy a corvette with the body of a crown vic.

    #989259

    oomis
    Participant

    Love it. But I am married, so my vote doesn’t count. it certainly would not bother my girls.

    Here’s a question for the guys:

    If an intelligent girl expresses the desire to be a Stay At Home wife and mother, would THAT be a dealbreaker for YOU? If not, why not, and if so, why?

    #989260

    Brony
    Participant

    Popa, I DISPUTE

    your contention that

    asking about a single characteristic

    is logically invalid.

    I left all other variables FLUID,

    thus allowing the shirt to be a

    DEALBREAKER. A proper analogy would be:

    would you buy your dream car if it

    had the headlights of a crown vic.

    If YU dudes are your ideal,

    then obviously the answer is yes

    because you want a crown vic.

    #989261

    ☕️coffee addict
    Participant

    oomis

    you remind me of something my ry wife said to me when i was starting to date and gave her a list of what i was looking for in a wife, one of which is that she “thinks” and she told me youre not going to find one (which im understanding to mean that they are few and far between) so if it was true that she is intelligent then yes i would work

    #989262

    Brony
    Participant

    If an intelligent girl expresses the desire to be a Stay At Home wife and mother, would THAT be a dealbreaker for YOU? If not, why not, and if so, why?

    Definitely not a dealbreaker,

    but only if she had the right REASONS

    and had what do ALL DAY.

    if there’s even a hint of laziness

    then mos def NOT OKAY

    also, until first kid comes

    she needs to work, no excuses

    The Gemara says: no work at all

    makes the wimminz go crazy

    #989263

    ZeesKite
    Participant

    OK. Here’s one for both sides.

    Is a colored shirt better if it was originally white?

    #989264

    Sam2
    Participant

    ZK: L’chulei Alma not. A person wearing that would be Chayav Misah.

    #989265

    Why does the color of his shirt matter?

    Thats what I call close-minded

    #989266

    Brony
    Participant

    HEY,

    this thread isn’t a colored shirt thread

    (those are lame)

    it’s a zone where people can

    DISCREETLY and ANONYMOUSLY

    glean information from others.

    Okay, new question:

    Ladies,

    What would you think about

    a guy who pulls up to a date

    in a STYLIN’ vehicle (think Acura TL)

    1. Spoiled brat

    2. Classy guy

    3. Who cares, more handbagz for me!!!1!

    ?

    #989267

    ZeesKite
    Participant

    Laughing, consider the case I posed, If it was a white shirt, now colored, does it matter?

    #989268

    Zeeskite- well i guess that would depend on WHY its colored- if he’s an artsy guy and dyed it himself then thats great but if he’s been wearing the same one for years and thats why its colored then…. well… finish my sentence

    #989269

    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    brony: Right. To which I responded that it doesn’t exist. Are you asking merely a theoretical question?

    #989270

    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    How would I know if its a good sports car or wtvr…..I’m only a girl! That’s the stuff I ask my brother!

    #989271

    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    Sam, that’s only if it’s gooey.

    #989272

    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    Just because there are only two genders, does that make these two actual opposites? If there would be 13 different genders, these two would probably be the most similar.

    #989273

    bygirl93
    Member

    None of the above- guys borrow their parents or friends cars for dates all the time!

    #989274

    PBA: How can I get the money to you?

    #989275

    golfer
    Participant

    MorahRach, your husband ” where’s colored shirts ” ???

    Ouch! That hurt!

    #989276

    interjection
    Participant

    “in a STYLIN’ vehicle (think Acura TL)….?”

    I’d think he was unhappy with his own being that he feels he needs a cool car to prove his self worth.

    #989277

    ZeesKite
    Participant

    golfer:

    This is YW CR. Anything goes. (as long as you can sound it out)

    #989278

    ZeesKite
    Participant

    Laughing:

    See. That’s also close-minded. You always have the option of using a nose clip.

    #989279

    SayIDidIt™
    Participant

    RGB™ send me the $ and I’ll make sure pba gets the virtual ones!! (You can click my SN for more info)

    SiDi™

    #989280

    oomis
    Participant

    My son used to drive a real clunker. There were in fact some girls who looked down their noses at that. B”H he is not seeing any of them anymore.

    Yes, I would like a guy to have a nice car rather than an ugly one, but only if he can afford it himself, not from his parents, and if the appearance of the car is reflective of the beauty inside HIM, then it is fine by me. A nice car does not automatically mean a nice guy.

    #989281

    NJ_Mom
    Member

    I once dated a guy with a nice car. Yes, the car was his, not from his parents. But I noticed on each of our dates that he had new license plates. I investigated further and found he had a criminal past! I couldn’t have dumped him faster! I can only thank G-d that he opened my eyes to realize that.

    #989282

    MorahRach
    Member

    hate when i do that! obviously everyone here knows that i meant to write, wears…!

    #989283

    Brony
    Participant

    LOLOLOLOL criminal past

    Speaking of CRIMINAL

    Ladies, what would you make of

    a guy who gets lots of

    SPEEDING AND PARKING TICKETS?

    victim of police brutality

    or idiot?

    #989284

    Brony
    Participant

    Oh, and for Popa(?)

    let me put it in terms

    you can understand:

    “OMGOMG I just got redt this guy

    who seems purfect but

    wears colored shirts.

    Would this bother any of you??”

    Also, ladies, some UNSOLICITED advice:

    UGGS look horrendous,

    but a nice pair of VANS

    MAKE MY DAY

    #989285

    Sam2
    Participant

    HaLeiVi: The proper response should have been “that’s only if he’s a Talmid Chacham”. Does it have to be gooey? I always assumed that it still applies even after it’s dried. Any Makor either way

    (I was once eating somewhere and I noticed that somehow a little gravy had spilled on my clothes. To this day I am unsure if I dripped it myself without noticing or if one of the young children present had splattered it on me. I was worried about this Halachah. Someone beside me asked why I was so worried that I was going to run home and change. So I told him the Gemara and the Halachah. He told me, “It’s okay. No one will think you’re a Talmid Chacham because you’re not wearing a white shirt anyway.” I was offended, but I realized he was right. It was quite Ga’avadik of me to think of myself as a Talmid Chacham in that regard. But after thinking it over, I realized that because there are a fair few number of people who trust me for learning and for P’sak, this Din probably applies to me regardless of how much I actually know.)

    #989286

    Brony: VANS? The shoes with Magen Davids on the bottom?

    #989287

    Cutie
    Member

    My husband wears colored shirts (and pants! Ie. khaki, beige, etc) and it never bothered me until recently…when I started asking myself, since we are among mostly Yeshivish people all the time, why does he want to make himself different so that he stands out? I think sometimes there might be a dynamic at play that might involve various issues… A rebellious streak perhaps?

    #989288

    bygirl93
    Member

    brony- just plain stupid- if you’re gonna constantly do it, don’t get caught! there is a famous quote: “fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me”- do it every once in a while, whatever thats normal! but constantly??????? thats just dumb!

    #989289

    Brony
    Participant

    LOL yes those

    did not know about stars

    frankly, don’t care

    they are still SWAG

    but if it bothers you

    Sperrys are credited as well

    #989290

    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    I figured that part is obvious. Also, the Din would still apply to ZK, but that’s a different story.

    I said only if it’s gooey, since the Gemara was specifically speaking of goo. I think Rabbeinu Chananel is more clear about the idea being that it disgusts people to be near him. Dried goo might also be included. I only meant, as opposed to ketchup or grape juice.

    I was always told that it applies to all Yeshiva, or learning, people.

    #989291

    Sam2
    Participant

    HaLeiVi: That would sort of make sense if you follow the reason, but certainly it wouldn’t apply to a guy in his first few years of Yeshivah.

    #989292

    interjection
    Participant

    Brony: “UGGS look horrendous”

    It’s comfort before style. Just this past Shabbos my friends and I were reminiscing about our UGGS. I personally wait all summer and spring to wear mine. It’s been too hot I miss them!! They’re like walking on the clouds!!!

    #989293

    Brony
    Participant

    bygirl93 the question was

    entirely theoretical

    I am naturally a

    SAFE AND COURTEOUS

    driver.

    It sounds like you have

    lots of pet peeves

    that you feel guys

    should know about

    care to share?

    #989294

    golfer
    Participant

    Hi Zeeskite! Yes, i noticed this is the YW CR. I’m new here, and figuring things out. Now you have me confused. As a longtime honorable member, surely you’ve noticed that there appear to be entire threads getting all excited about the use, or misuse, of an apostrophe! So is the YW CR rule: anything goes (as you kindly pointed out) as long as it doesn’t involve puctuation marks?

    #989295

    ZABACHUR
    Participant

    being in a yeshiva that is notorious for wearing colored shirts for many years has colored my opinion on this matter very much…if a girl were to be so shallow as to only go out with guys who wear white shirts then it clearly paints a picture of the girl herself…obviously the age old saying “dont judge a book by its cover” comes to mind and it really rings true in this arena…guys who wear colored shirts can also be yeshivish (albeit not in the white shirt black pants sense)i’ve come across many many many guys that girls should be lining up around the block for, and guess what…they wear colored shirts…and the opposite is also true…ive seen lots of “bums” who are in big name yeshivas and wear the garb. its all about who the person is and whether they have the characteristics you are looking for in a guy.

    #989296

    ZABACHUR
    Participant

    golfer…feel free to pick apart my post with a fine tooth comb

    #989297

    ZABACHUR
    Participant

    and mad props brony! sweet thread!

    #989298

    bygirl93
    Member

    1st of all i answered your theoretical question with a theoretical answer; there is no possible way to know that a guy has a lot of tickets. but if such a thing was possible- it would not be a deal breaker but if there were other stuff too, it would add to it.

    now to answer this: “It sounds like you have lots of pet peeves that you feel guys should know about care to share?”

    nope just 3 pet peeves: smoking, pictures on resumes, and being stupid! people have to use more common sense!!!! and i’m sure im not the only girl who can’t stand those 3 things.

    #989299

    interjection
    Participant

    what bothers you about smoking?

    how do you define stupidity?

    curiosity….

    #989300

    golfer
    Participant

    Zabachur, no fine tooth comb necessary; and anyway, i already put mine away for the evening. I couldn’t agree with you more (and your spelling wasn’t bad either). Some of my favorite friends & relatives wear colored shirts. Seriously. The problem with girls dating is that: a) some of them are really young & shallow, and b) shidduchim can be very confusing and it can be very hard to figure out the true nature and hashkafa of a person, so girls may instead focus on the external, less meaningful things that are easy to see at a glance. Personally, i love the look of a fine white shirt l’chovod Shabbos & YT, but shirt color is a poor yardstick when measuring the quality and character of a person.

    #989301

    ZABACHUR
    Participant

    well put…although i think i might want to revise or add to what i said before…if a girl wants to only go out with guys who wear white shirts that can maybe sometimes be ok. If that is truly what they are looking for and that is the way they have been brought up then so be it. who are we to tell them not to…on the other hand a better way to go about it would be requesting guys from only a certain yeshiva or social group…but in the end the only thing that matters is that people understand that if you’re in yeshiva and learning as much as you can then you can be a good person too..even if you beshita don’t wear white shirts

    #989302

    interjection
    Participant

    If the stress placed on white shirts is in fact so shallow and insignificant then what stops a guy who wears colored shirts from wearing exclusively white? Obviously there is some significance in the color of the shirt.

Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 275 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.