August 12, 2012 4:39 am at 4:39 am #989409
“Tall, dark, & handsome.”
I understand handsome (duh), and tall makes some sense. What’s the “dark” thing all about? How dark, what kind of dark, tan dark or exotic foreigner dark?
Also, it seems to me like current fashion for girls is to fall head over heels for the frail, boyish, Bieber look than the masculine manly look. Please help settle these recurring points of confusion!August 12, 2012 8:13 pm at 8:13 pm #989410
Probably originates from “swagger” which someone who is full of himself does.August 13, 2012 12:37 am at 12:37 am #989411princess17Member
Everyone probably has different definitions but i think dark means tanned , but some people may think it means dark hair… Everyone is different some people may like the younger cuter look and some people may think it too imature and kid-ish. I think most girls who go for that look are kids them selves or have kid-ish looks like teenagers under 20. Alot of chassidish ppl. who get married have more of a young kid face because they are still young as supposed to litvish ppl who get married more like 19 , 20 and up and have more adult young faces .August 13, 2012 12:54 am at 12:54 am #989412🍫Syag LchochmaParticipant
oomis – love itAugust 13, 2012 1:50 am at 1:50 am #989413
TY, Syag (not Swag).August 14, 2012 1:59 am at 1:59 am #989414No One Mourns The WickedMember
“Also, it seems to me like current fashion for girls is to fall head over heels for the frail, boyish, Bieber look than the masculine manly look. Please help settle these recurring points of confusion!”
Ohhh, I know what you mean. It’s those guys that wear the plastered pants that leave nothing to the imagination…?
Ew, give me tall and broad any day!August 14, 2012 2:08 pm at 2:08 pm #989415Doodle-Man™Member
TY, Syag (not Swag).
lol. I actually thought it said swag at first.September 2, 2012 10:08 pm at 10:08 pm #989416
BUMP with Q for the ladies.
Are frum girls attracted to bodybuilders, or have they been conditioned to like the skinny Jewish look? If yes, what do you like more, the abercrombie model look or a bigger more muscular aesthetic? Also would it bother you to hear that a guy has competed or will compete in a bodybuilding show?
ZyzzSeptember 3, 2012 1:59 am at 1:59 am #989417
@zyzz, do you mean bodybuilder like Arnold Schwarzenegger or an ambercrombie model? 2 very different builds. personally, I want s/o who can wear flat-front pants but is not shaped like a stick/pencil, ie someone well built. some girls don’t care about the fitness level; I do. I want s/o who can play a game of ball and works out. I respect my guf, I want a husband who does as well.
That being said, yes it would bother me to hear a guy wants to/will compete in a bodybuilding competition. if it was in the past and is no longer a focus/priority in his life it is another story.September 3, 2012 4:46 am at 4:46 am #989418
@yenta I mean a bodybuilder like Arnold, someone who builds his body into the most aesthetically pleasing shape possible by developing all muscles proportionally, although obviously much smaller than Arnold was. Abercrombie models are not bodybuilders. They don’t train legs or back. Actually, they don’t train anything other than abs, chest and biceps.
Why would it bother you if a guy has interest in competing?September 3, 2012 1:52 pm at 1:52 pm #989420
@zyzz,Abercrombie models wear shorts thus you would not know if they train the thigh muscles.
(sorry for the long post and plz don’t take anything personally)
it would bother me because it is not my priority in life to have a pretty guf. in order to have as you say “the most aesthetically pleasing shape possible by developing all muscles proportionally” it requires rigorous training and dedication. it becomes one’s focus and priority in life. between physically training, the preparation (diet, sleep etc) and eventual competition, much time is spent on looking perfect. there is nothing wrong with being in shape or playing a game of hoops everyday between sedarim or after work. I am looking for a husband who’s priority is to serve H’ and provide for his family as well (a working guy) bluntly, it bothers me because it seems like misplaced priorities to me. the guf is a vessel to serve H’. and just like a car needs maintenance to run properly, the body needs food, exercise, periodic ‘tune-ups’. a car can be a pimped out mustang with chrome wheels, megawatt speakers and V8 engine or it can be a basic Toyota Camry. both are cars but one is for function, the other is not. just because I don’t have a six pack or highly defined biceps, does not mean I can’t carry 40lbs easily or hold down a screaming 5 year old. it is not a prerequisite of being in shape to have defined muscles. if a person is in shape and healthy, B”H.
I do have to add that I do not like the look of Arnold at his prime or other professional body builders who serve their bodies rather than the other way aroundSeptember 12, 2012 6:13 am at 6:13 am #989440
I posted comments here yesterday and today, is there something missing here???September 12, 2012 2:11 pm at 2:11 pm #989443frummy in the tummyParticipant
Question for women: Do you see the man’s role in marriage as being something of the ‘leader’, someone to whom the woman looks up to in a certain sense and to whom she can look to for guidance in a way that he can not look to her? To me, this seems like something that should be left behind in the 19th century. I’m not expecting this to be a unanimous vote but I am interested in hearing what people have to say on the matter.September 12, 2012 4:07 pm at 4:07 pm #989444YW Moderator-95Moderator
You have all noticed that a discussion was deleted. That discussion will not be allowed, sorry.
I refrained from closing the thread since this is a long thread with many discussion.
95September 12, 2012 5:22 pm at 5:22 pm #989445
95, if thats the case, why wasn’t the entire discussion removed? and also, so i know for future posts, what part was wrong? thanksSeptember 12, 2012 7:37 pm at 7:37 pm #989447
I’m not sure what we did wrong either…
you didn’t do anything wrong. It is just not a topic we are discussing on this site.September 12, 2012 8:21 pm at 8:21 pm #989448
Okay. Thank you.September 12, 2012 8:26 pm at 8:26 pm #9894492scentsParticipant
Now you made us much more curious!
BTW, I see that my post did not go through, I really think that there is nothing wrong with my post, please let me know if otherwise.
Thanks!September 12, 2012 8:31 pm at 8:31 pm #989450
then why did it go through the first time around?September 12, 2012 10:33 pm at 10:33 pm #989451
I am not sure i understand fully, we didnt do anything wrong yet we cant discuss what we where? Either we crossed a line or not, and if we did can you tell us what for future refrence so it doesnt happen again?September 12, 2012 10:39 pm at 10:39 pm #989452
frummy in the tummy- I do agree with you that it should be left back in 19 century! In the school i went to in twelve grade we had a toras habayis and in it the teacher talked about how the women are supposed to help the men that they are what it is all about, decision making… I personally do not agree with the husband being the ‘leader’ as you put it. I believe marriage is when two people see eye to eye, treat each other equally and both want to hear the others opinion on things.September 13, 2012 12:07 am at 12:07 am #989453nannyMember
guys… Why are you making such a big fuss? obviously the mod it telling you this whole thing is so inappropriate!! In the frum world, why do women generally not talk to men that aren’t relatives? and why don’t frum men generally not talk to women who aren’t related?? well, this isn’t much different!! And especially when speaking about certain things… bodybuilding?! seriously?
Yeah, some of these things are crossing the line, if I may say so.
Please– If you really need to ask someone, ask a relative or friend… This is a YeshivaWorld after all, and we are representing Frum Jews right here! Please.September 13, 2012 1:11 am at 1:11 am #989454
i don’t think you saw the part that got deleted.September 13, 2012 2:08 am at 2:08 am #989455nannyMember
maybe not… (I shudder to think!)September 13, 2012 3:17 am at 3:17 am #989460
mods is there a reason why my post isnt here? Why can i not stand up for myself when someone is clearly judging me wrongly???September 13, 2012 3:24 am at 3:24 am #989461mytakeMember
Imagine if this discussion was about the other gender’s body and looks. From a hashkafic perspective, this is totally off.September 13, 2012 3:40 am at 3:40 am #989462interjectionParticipant
“In the frum world, why do women generally not talk to men that aren’t relatives? and why don’t frum men generally not talk to women who aren’t related??”
Not for the reasons your Bais Yaakov told you.
And the topic likely wasn’t deleted because it was inappropriate; it was offensive.September 13, 2012 3:52 am at 3:52 am #989463
Yes. Seriously. I am a serious bodybuilder and I see no problem in discussing bodybuilding. I believe that the frum community is seeing a lot of health issues such as obesity, eating disorders, etc… which could be prevented by educating people about fitness and nutrition. Not everyone has to be a bodybuilder, but why the hate for something that is healthy, productive, educational, and doesn’t harm a soul?
ZyzzSeptember 13, 2012 4:17 am at 4:17 am #989464
It was really not that bad… that’s why we are confused about it getting deleted. Also, nanny, in response to your earlier comment, what’s nice about this thread is that we can anonymously ask/answer honest questions that would be too embarrassing to ask/answer honestly in real life. Sometimes relatives and friends don’t give straight answers because they don’t want to offend. Here, thanks to anonymity, we can get honest answers and not be embarrassed to ask questions to which we really would like no-nonsense answers. It can be very constructive.September 13, 2012 7:31 am at 7:31 am #989465
mytake, and to all others who are unaware of the deleted conversation- The conversation that was deleted had nothing to do with inappropiate things, we are all adults here and it would be nice to act like them, what was discussed was something that we thought was appropiate to be seen on YWN, i just want to say for those of you who didnt know what the conversation was about and are autamatically thinking it was so bad just rememeber it is right before Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur!!!September 13, 2012 1:50 pm at 1:50 pm #989466
For all the men out there. Exercise both your minds AND your bodies. But don’t try to look like Ah-nuld. it is not a pretty sight.September 13, 2012 1:59 pm at 1:59 pm #9894672scentsParticipant
as a fellow body builder, the discussion here was not about body building, rather about which body figure a women would rather want.
I think that this is highly inappropriate.September 13, 2012 3:22 pm at 3:22 pm #989468
Interjection, I’m not sure which part of my comment you found offensive. I apologize if you did, that wasn’t my intention.September 13, 2012 3:56 pm at 3:56 pm #989469mytakeMember
I have no idea what comments were deleted and my last post was in reference to the conversation in general, not the deleted posts.September 13, 2012 11:43 pm at 11:43 pm #989470interjectionParticipant
Curiosity: I was not offended and I would never be offended over some anonymous blogger on the internet, besides that nothing you said was offensive. I may disagree, however.
Some other woman was fiercely defending herself to your posts. I think she felt you judging her.September 14, 2012 12:56 am at 12:56 am #989471
2scents – that’s a completely different conversation than the one that was deleted. The conversation you are referring to wasn’t erased.September 14, 2012 2:49 am at 2:49 am #989472
interjection, are you referring to my comments?September 14, 2012 3:17 am at 3:17 am #989473
mytake- i reread the earlier comments and i relize where i made a mistake, my apoligies!September 14, 2012 4:23 am at 4:23 am #989474
The deleted comments were about women being doctorsSeptember 14, 2012 4:34 am at 4:34 am #989475
Interjection – I see. You are well within your rights to disagree. In case the poster u mentioned did think I was judging her, I was not. She asked for an opinion, and I volunteered mine and explained my reasoning.September 14, 2012 8:25 am at 8:25 am #989476
breindyfeldman- actually they were about women doctors serving all cliental, and weather or not people would feel comfertable with it.September 14, 2012 2:02 pm at 2:02 pm #989477
disregard my previous post.
Curiosity, I was never offended by your posts. I was curious to hear what your thoughts were but I took no offense at what you wrote.September 14, 2012 9:15 pm at 9:15 pm #989478
Yiddeshemeidle- actually I was the one who started that discussion (sorry to the moderator who thought it was not an appropriate topic)September 14, 2012 10:13 pm at 10:13 pm #989479
curiosity- i dont think the poster felt judged, she had nothing to be judged about, you two where discussing your opinions on a subject they just happend to be different opinionsSeptember 14, 2012 11:42 pm at 11:42 pm #989480mischiefmakerMember
My question to guys is do you like a lot of makeup?September 19, 2012 3:15 pm at 3:15 pm #989481frummy in the tummyParticipant
mischief – I’ve never tried it, so I don’t know.
But seriously, depends what you mean by ‘a lot’. I generally like the makeup look, and rarely notice there being too much. If it looks good, I like it. But this is one of those preference things – every guy likes something different (I’ve discovered that with my friend who keeps trying to set me up with people I’m not attracted to). And some guys don’t like makeup at all.September 19, 2012 8:05 pm at 8:05 pm #989482
I wasn’t going to be the first to comment because I know girls/women get very defensive about makeup, but now that frummy in the tummy broke the ice, I’m going to be very blunt. First of all, to answer the question, frummy in the tummy is right: It’s definitely a preference thing. To me, the caked-on foundation look might look nice from far away, and in pictures, but not up close. If Hashem made you even mildly naturally appealing then what are you trying to accomplish by looking even better? Hashem made the world in a way that men are naturally attracted to women, and doing things to enhance that attraction where it shouldn’t exist in the first place is inappropriate.
Also, some women who don’t need makeup wear it all the time, and I don’t understand why. Especially if you are married and you don’t have a problem with your natural looks that would make you feel uncomfortable going out in public, then you shouldn’t try so hard to look attractive (unless it’s for your husband.) It causes people to be nichshal.
If you are doing it on a shidduch date then I understand, but you should definitely eventually allow your prospective shidduch to see what you look like without makeup before you get married. It’s good to know what how he responds to your looks (your real looks) when you didn’t put hours of preparation into it. When you are married and living together you won’t always have gallons of make-up on and your hair perfect, so he should know what he’s getting himself into 😉September 19, 2012 11:02 pm at 11:02 pm #989483superstarMember
Ok it doesnt go both ways. If the woman has to change the diapers, feed the baby, and dress the baby… then she gets to buy her husband’s clothes and decide that pink and purple does NOT work with guys. She also gets to buy the socks and not cologne. And demand showers!
Any man who wants to pick what his wife should wear needs to take care of the kids. Then i give him permission to wear a pink dress.
🙂 I am so not kidding!September 20, 2012 2:51 am at 2:51 am #989484WIYMember
I prefer someone who can get away with using a little makeup. There are girls who need a lot of makeup because they have bad skin and therefore they should wear a lot of makeup and do what they feel they need to do to look their best but if a girl is naturally attractive I find it unappealing when she cakes on the makeup.September 20, 2012 8:17 pm at 8:17 pm #989485
I make no apologies for wearing makeup. No matter how hard you try to convince me, some girls were NOT created to be as physically attractive as others, and they may need a little or even a LOT of help. All Bnos Yisrael are not necessarily beautiful externally, though internally they can be, and it is naive to say otherwise, no matter how spiritually PC that sounds.
So in order for guys to bother to get to know how beautiful that Yiddishe tochter is inside, it often is VERY necessary for her to make the outside match the inside. Clothing, makeup, jewelry, the way she carries herself, all help to enhance the immediate visual presentation. Make no mistake, Hashrm created us with eyes that see. We are attracted first by what we see, whether it is a person, a food platter, a house, etc. and THEN we see what else there is to hold our interest on a more permanent basis. Maybe that’s not fair – but it is what it is. Hashem even created babies to have huge expressive eyes and very round faces, because it is a visually pleasing look. Otherwise, many people would find that squalling, messy spitter-upper, and diaper-soiler, to not be so appealing for caretaking purposes. Looks should not matter, but realistically, they do.
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