Shavuos Night For Girls

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  • #597285

    Now this question is for the girls. While your fathers and brothers are out there all night learning, how do you make the most of Shavuos night? Do you also stay up all night learning, saying tehillim, or is your inspiration catching some zzzzs. Let me know, because my sister wants to make this year meaningful.

    #775338

    Pac-Man
    Member

    Sleep.

    #775339

    dunno
    Member

    One year I studied for finals but the rest I slept.

    #775340

    Toi
    Participant

    Ditto

    #775341

    smile66
    Member

    Last year in Israel I stayed up all night going to speeches, and that was very meaningful. Then again that was Israel. This year I’m planning on staying up trying to learn stuff to help make Shavuos more meaningful, ’till I get tired. We’ll see how it goes.

    #775342

    YW Moderator-42
    Moderator

    Does this mean that the Pac-Man with the dash is a girl and the other is a boy?

    #775343

    Pac-Man
    Member

    No, just advising the best course of action for the gentler gender.

    #775344

    lyyb
    Member

    When we asked Rabbi Miller Z”L from Gateshead Sem to give us some extra classes for Shavuos,He explained to us that it is Pikuah nefesh to a girl not to sleep through the night. So even if we want to we can stay one or two hours later than usial AND THATS IT!

    #775345

    dunno
    Member

    How is it pikuach nefesh?

    #775346

    charliehall
    Participant

    In my community, many women participate in all night learning.

    #775347

    Pac-Man
    Member

    In your community some women also participate in the rabbinate.

    #775348

    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    In your community some women also participate in the rabbinate.

    lol

    #775349

    real-brisker
    Member

    Joseph – Your on a roll tonight!

    #775350

    When I was a teenager, I sometimes went to shiurim on Shavuos night. Now that I’m a busy mommy of quite a few, I sleep. I think it’s the most ruchniyus thing for me to do because it gives me koach to take care of my children the following day.

    When we asked Rabbi Miller Z”L from Gateshead Sem to give us some extra classes for Shavuos,He explained to us that it is Pikuah nefesh to a girl not to sleep through the night.

    Can you kindly tell that to my baby? <yawn>

    #775351

    SJSinNYC
    Member

    The lectures in my shul are open to everyone.

    I will be home sleeping. I’m due today and there is no way I can survive on no sleep.

    #775352

    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    SJS,

    B’sha’ah tova.

    #775353

    MiddlePath
    Participant

    If a girl wants to stay up all night doing anything that will inspire her to be closer to G-d, then she should do it. If a girl wants to sleep, then she should do that.

    #775354

    A Heimishe Mom
    Participant

    It is the latest krumkeit and is totally wrong. Women and girls belong at home dealing with house things – the meal, kids etc. they will be sleep deprived enough as it is. Girls without house responsabilities should perhaps read something meaningful after the meal, as opposed to a novel. V’ZEHU!!

    #775355

    cantoresq
    Member

    Although probably retrograde in many precincts, there used to be a very sweet practice among the Yekkes on Shavuot night. The men went to learn and in the middle of the night, unmarried girls would gather to serve refreshments, giving eligible bachelors an opportunity to acquaint themselves with prospective shidduchim.

    #775356

    msseeker
    Member

    Get a good night’s sleep and go to shul for shacharis with a clear head. If you can get to a Satmar shul, there’s a special avodah by Ahava Rabah, with a beautiful, uplifting niggun.

    #775357

    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    The men went to learn and in the middle of the night, unmarried girls would gather to serve refreshments, giving eligible bachelors an opportunity to acquaint themselves with prospective shidduchim.

    … and making it very difficult for the men to concentrate on their learning.

    #775358

    mamashtakah
    Member

    It is the latest krumkeit and is totally wrong. Women and girls belong at home dealing with house things – the meal, kids etc.

    I wish when people write these things they would add in my opinion, since there is no halacha backing this up.

    That being said, my youngest daughter stayed up either last year or the year before, and told me at lunch the next day that she had stayed up and had the best learning she ever had. That’s fine by me.

    #775359

    BSD
    Member

    “The men went to learn and in the middle of the night, unmarried girls would gather to serve refreshments, giving eligible bachelors an opportunity to acquaint themselves with prospective shidduchim.”

    “… and making it very difficult for the men to concentrate on their learning.”

    I will not mention any names in case some take this the wrong way(though some may know of whom I speak) there was mashgiach of a well known yeshiva that was asked to ban the practice of women coming to watch the men dance on purim because of pritzus. The mashgiach said to the contrary-this way the men dance better- and in your example, the men will learn better.

    #775361

    brotherofurs
    Participant

    i never did anything special usually sleep but this year i’m soo excited because i have a Chumash final after shavuot so i can learn that Torah on shavuot:)!

    #775362

    Pac-Man
    Member

    BSD: Don’t shlep the Mashgiach into your bad comparisons.

    #775363

    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    BSD,

    It takes a different kind of concentration to learn than to dance.

    #775364

    BSD
    Member

    Pac-Man: dach zuch as der masgiach hut dir gemaint!

    #775365

    BSD
    Member

    Da’as,

    At least they will shukkel better!

    #775366

    cherrybim
    Participant

    “In your community some women also participate in the rabbinate.”

    Joe, that was a good one. Sorry Charlie.

    #775367

    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    BS’D,

    At least they will shukkel better!

    No doubt!

    #775368

    klach
    Member

    “It is the latest krumkeit and is totally wrong. Women and girls belong at home dealing with house things – the meal, kids etc.”

    “I wish when people write these things they would add in my opinion, since there is no halacha backing this up.”

    I personally know of multiple Gedolei Roshei Yeshivos who said that when women publicly practice a religous something that is solely in the domain of the men, (ie laining, shavuos night learning, etc), the motivation is wanting to be equal to – the same as – men. Women who are truly religously motivated l’shaim shamayim do their thing without any fanfare or political statement. There are many stories about the rebbetzins of gedolim throughout the generations who did all kinds of things. However, specifically in regards to shavuos, there is no basis whatsoever for the women to stay up all night learning. That does not mean that it is intrinsically asur. However, if it could/will? lead to even the slightest argument with her husband, if she’ll be in a worse mood on shavuos, etc, then she’ll be worse off for doing so. The feminist movement doesn’t understand the idea of different yet equal. HASHEM gave men things to do and gave women things to do. (One went as far as to say that a woman who wants to have, for example, a womens minyan is lying when she says the bracha of she’asani kirtzono because she clearly is jealous of the avodah given to men.) There is unlimited room for real spiritual growth within the framework of mitzvos given to women. Do these same women also strive to work on their middos with the same zeal? Usually not. Just as a woman should not be yearning to express her religous fervor through putting on tefillin, a woman should not look to staying up all night on shavuos as a means to spiritual fulfillment. Furthermore, there are shitos that hold that a man who will have his davening negatively impacted as a result of staying up all night should not. And the nashim tzidkaniyos who have stayed up all night were on a pretty high madreigah who already were tremendous baalei middos etc.

    #775369

    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    He explained to us that it is Pikuah nefesh to a girl not to sleep through the night.

    In what way is it pikuach nefesh for a girl to stay up but not for a boy to stay up?

    The Wolf

    #775370

    cantoresq
    Member

    Daas Yochid

    Member

    The men went to learn and in the middle of the night, unmarried girls would gather to serve refreshments, giving eligible bachelors an opportunity to acquaint themselves with prospective shidduchim.

    … and making it very difficult for the men to concentrate on their learning

    ____________________________________________________

    Not every distraction is necessarily a bad thing; especially if it leads to successful matches.

    #775371

    charliehall
    Participant

    “unmarried girls would gather to serve refreshments, giving eligible bachelors an opportunity to acquaint themselves with prospective shidduchim”

    And they never heard of a shidduch crisis.

    #775372

    charliehall
    Participant

    “”In your community some women also participate in the rabbinate.”

    Yes, in my community women learn Hilchot Shabat, Hilchot Kashrut, Hilchot Taharat Hamishpachah, and Hilchot Aveilut — all halachot for which they are chayev — and can get acknowledged for that learning. Some then teach and answer questions from other women. There is nothing wrong with this! You’d rather have women who are ignorant of these mitzvot?

    #775373

    twisted
    Participant

    Pacman, your rather nasty and largely inaccurate comment is rather inappropriate erev the yom tov which at least once was typified by kish echad b’lev echad.

    #775374

    123bubby
    Participant

    I will stuuudy and stuuuudy and stuuuuuudy for a huuuuge dinim final!!

    #775375

    hanib
    Participant

    b’shaa tova SJS!

    mother in israel: lol!

    i think it’s pikuach nefesh for the kids if the mothers get their sleep. 😉

    #775376

    Pac-Man
    Member

    twister: It is hardly inaccurate when Charlie literally admitted, ironically enough in the comment immediately preceding yours, stating “Yes” that his community indeed has women participating in the rabbinate. It is too bad for you that his comment didn’t appear before you submitted yours.

    #775377

    Pac-man-

    Nowhere in his post does he say “yes there are women participating in the rabbinate.”

    There is a big, huge difference between knowing halachot necessary to your life and being a Rabbi.

    If your not able to figure that out-

    Twisted is totally absolutely correct.

    #775378

    in defense of pacman

    i interpreted the response as he did

    charlie quoted: “In your community some women also participate in the rabbinate.”

    then he answered: “Yes”

    he did go on to describe how women in his community learn certain Halachos, making the “yes” somewhat ambiguous, but he did answer “yes” in response to a direct question.

    #775379

    rivky101
    Member

    tehillem is gr8 to say

    #775380

    Pac-Man
    Member

    Exactly as Mod-80 said (thank you). Additionally, Charlie has previously stated on this forum that he is a member and congregant at the Hebrew Institute of Riverdale, led by Rabbi Avi Weiss and “Rabba” Sara Hurwitz.

    #775381

    lyyb: When we asked Rabbi Miller Z”L from Gateshead Sem to give us some extra classes for Shavuos,He explained to us that it is Pikuah nefesh to a girl not to sleep through the night.

    You sure? I could imagine him looking at me quizzically and making a dry comment but I can’t see where ‘pikuach nefesh’ would come into it.

    #775382

    nishtdayngesheft
    Participant

    Indeed, somehow Charlie equates learning halachos that any beis yaakov student or yeshiva bochur learns as being part f the rabbinate.

    I think that defines what he thinks is the rabbinate. And if that is the rabbinate, what do those who are not of the rebbinate know of halacha?

    Oy

    #775383

    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Not every distraction is necessarily a bad thing; especially if it leads to successful matches.

    There’s a proper time for everything.

    And they never heard of a shidduch crisis.

    Why, did they only allow “slightly older” girls to serve refreshments?

    #775384

    cantoresq
    Member

    Why, did they only allow “slightly older” girls to serve refreshments?

    _____________________________________________

    I didn’t say “slightly older girls” I said “unmarried girls.”

    #775385

    Pac-Man
    Member

    cantoresq: You missed Daas Yochid’s comma.

    #775386

    ItcheSrulik
    Member

    nishtdayn: If you think that every bais yaakov girl learns their halachos from the shulchan oruch (leaving the rest of the acharonim out of it) you’re in dream land. If you think that yeshiva bochurim know halacha as well as a bais yaakov girl of the same age, you’re beyond dream land and I’d like some of what you used to get there.

    #775387

    dvorak
    Member

    It all boils down to my pre-motherhood days versus post-motherhood. As a teenager, and also as a married woman yet to have kids, I went to shiurim and stayed up all night. Now that I’m a mommy, I stay home taking care of the baby and (hopefully) getting some sleep. I suppose one day in the far future, I will have a youngest child who will be old enough to stay up learning, and when that time comes, I will probably go back to doing what I did prior to having children.

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