Limericks!

Oh no! Oh no! I have blundered

I didnt see the lims are all numbered

So I will not wait

But will congratulate

Yossi Z posted limerick FOUR HUNDRED!!! :~>

The ones posting in without fail

Are now all decidedly male

Where are all the women

Are they too busy slimmin’

To send in a rhyming email

( I’m assuming DY is a ???

Although er ken git der ?????

Cos then our best feeder

Would be called ??? ?????

And not ????? ,????? or ????? )

I just got hung up on

Boy was that rude

I hate the way hats

Treat an innocent snood.

Yossi–you’re right,I broke the “lim” rule

But you fixed it–pretty cool!

I gotta remember

From Jan. to December

That rules aren’t only in school!

First it is time to say kiddush

Then comes challah-delish!

But when it comes

To fill your tum

Please eat at the tish!

Good shabbos!

I have not, in a while

Used Limericking as a poetic style

Will it work out? Let’s see

2 more lines left to this rhyming

Not bad! Quite worthwhile!

(Can while and worthwhile be

In the same stanza when limericking

As last words to rhyming lines

Surely there are no fines

For rhyming stanza I’s line “A” to line “E”?)

I was so busy in the past week

I had no time to give a peek

The limericks are moving quick

All of them really click

As I was taken over by a strong fatigue.

I was so busy running to the gym

Waiting for the day I’ll be nice n slim

And it also snowed away

So the kids were home thurs & friday

I had no time to make a new lim’

I just ate some sushi and feel disgusting

My stomach feels like it’s busting

Eating late at night

Is so not right

My diet is really rusting.

But Yossi Z. I see you became a pro

I’m so proud of your new ego

You’re following rules

And making limerick pools

Your improvement really does show!

I’m too tired to continue rhyming

Just take a look at the timing

Gonna go get some sleep

Before the alarm goes beep beep

And the baby starts whining.

Gut Voch to all!

I think I may have got it

Though this’ll be nothing exotic

Just Sweet and short

Is just the sort

Of limerick that’s melodic.

Sorry for my previous try

Reading that’s good cause to cry

But now I think

These lines are in sync

This can you deny?

Thanks for your words, Smartcookie

I know I’m just a mere rookie

(But) This is contagious

These rhymes’re outrageous

If not a bit cookey

But that’s what makes limericks fun

I’ve read through the posts one by one

I’ve got the gist

Of what does consist

In Limericks 101.

Rabbosai, I’m getting frustrated;

what I will now say will be hated.

Some of these rhymes,

are not worth two dimes;

it shouldn’t be so complicated!

My presence here is so sporadic,

cause it makes me sick,

to see a limerick,

whose style is so erratic.

A rhyme means the words end the same;

you know, there are rule to this game.

The words tune and too,

that’s why these limericks are lame!

I gave now but one small example,

Unfortunately, there have been ample.

Cookey and rookie,

from rhyme school played hooky,

On rhyming rules these do trample.

I know I am being annoying,

and with your feelings I’m toying,

but boot, food and good,

you really should,

avoid in the same poem deploying.

Everyone will soon improve,

come now, let’s get on the move!

Just follow the rules,

we won’t look like fools.

Let’s get this thread back in the groove!

I hope no one did I insult,

I do not want that to result;

I meant it in jest,

you are all the best!

Forgive me and I will exult.

By the way, there are more pages,

but done in a way which enrages.

There used to be six,

pages of limericks,

now suddenly nine, not in stages.

Your view is quite slanted

Ans with your rhymes I’m enchanted

But you must excuse

A frum person’s muse

And poetic license might be granted

Your spelling is off, I might add

It leaves me wanting just a tad

Spelling rules are set in stone

While rhymes are more of tone

So some humility is to be had

I think all you posters are fest

your rhyming is really the best

from what you have said

you are all purebred

and are quite ahead of the rest

this is a real good education

which sets down a solid foundation

it does reflect

my utmost respect

to authors of limerick formation

whoever in this thread takes part

they must be exceedingly smart

it is my position

to give recognition

to those who write in from the heart

Sorry for my novice fumble

You sure know how to make one humble

But now it is time

To put to bed this rhyme

Before I further stumble.

I just hope you realize and see

Patience is a virtue – this is key

It may not be perfect

But pobody’s nerfect

On this most of us agree.

So with thanks, I take your lines

To use as guiding signs

Of what is supreme

To include in rhyme scheme

Of Limericking designs

Also I appreciate

Kind words that did indicate

All we can do is try

Can’t make our brains fry

To rhyme and communicate. 🙂

Monday, a new week at work

The “to do” pile is berserk

There’s numbers to crunch

No time to munch

Somewhere must be a perk.

Busy season is once again here

Newcomers to the field, beware!

Say ‘bye to your bed

Or quit while still ahead

Enjoy the tense atomsphere!

Sapphire,this “jewel” is for you

Since I’m up coughing,that,in lieu

Of the antibiotics

That smell like orthotics

Which never ended up getting through!

I will try the limerick style

Though I haven’t in a while

I will not boast

Look at my post

Hold on I’ve got mayil (mail)

I said earlier in this thread

That I really had to go to bed

Please don’t shout

Nor chew me out

Or else I’ll bang my head

Give me at most a week

Without driving me up a creek

Better I may be

Though not yet fully

And now I shall go to sleep (it is 12:30 by me)

Daas: was that better?

😀 yossi 😀

chayav is my bubby

my zaidy is her hubby

when i’m not clean

she puts me in the washing machine

i’d rather go in the bath-tubby

E-mail is overrated

They said I was so outdated

I wait for information

On the project situation

The cave men just SPOKE!!”antiquated”

eclipse, you’re not using your “kup”,

blinky did not just wake up.

The post merely waited,

until moderated,

or else, she has dialup!

Shticky, you write with a pen?

You seem to be from way back when.

I use a keyboard,

(except when I be bored)

so I don’t have to write it again.

ok!

When i used the words pen and bemuse

Some poetic license I did use

I really meant bemusement

And provided amusement

To guys with decaffeinated views

Bemuse is so different to behead

There was nothing wrong with what I said

On this there’s no pikpuk

Go learn English dikduk

Or revise with a dictionary instead!

But I must say you gave me a smile

Which lasted for oh quite a while

You guys are tremendous

Absolutely stupendous

As limerick upon limerick you pile

Yes I do always write with a pen

My poetry on a paper and then

I send it by mail

As quick as a snail

And attempt it on my dial up again

Why you think I live in old history

Is really one gigantic mystery

You call me old fashioned

Cos my ink it is rationed

My brother you’re not acting sister-y

When will we reach page ten?

Please let me know when

So we can pile

All with a smile

Limericks now more than then

😀 Zuberman! 😀

I am gonna have to say hey!

Why does this thread not stay?

On the front page

No I won’t rage

If you come out and play

😀 Zuberman! 😀