September 20, 2010 1:54 pm at 1:54 pm #592400
We BH have 100’s of wonderful organizations doing all kinds of chassadim for people in need whether they be physical or spiritual needs.
If you had the time or resources what organization would you start that you think is required because there just doesn’t seem to be anyone doing anything about that problem…
(Please leave Tznius out of this one we discussed it enough in the other threads)September 20, 2010 3:43 pm at 3:43 pm #697600
I dont think there are enough frum Foster Homes, that is definitely something I’d love to do when I get married (IY”H)…Husband permitting.September 20, 2010 5:03 pm at 5:03 pm #697601cherrybimParticipant
There is already a proliferation of “chesed tzadakos”; more are not needed. In addition, after all the high advertising and administrative costs, little resources are left for true aniyim.September 20, 2010 5:06 pm at 5:06 pm #697602
That is very kind of you. I hope you meet a guy who has such a kind nature as well.September 20, 2010 5:16 pm at 5:16 pm #697603truth4ruthParticipant
Our society is truly incredible when it comes to chesed organizations. However, as far as I know there aren’t any chesed organizations to help divorced familes financially, emotionally, etc… Communities jump to help a family when a parent in niftar (i.e. paying off mortgages and tuitions, setting up savings accounts for the kids) , R”L, and there are plenty of organizations to call if someone is sick or ‘at risk’, Chas V’shalom, but nobody to help a family that went through a divorce. Many times there isn’t enough money to cover the bills and expenses and the kids/parents could use counseling to get through this traumatic event (and avoid the ‘kid at risk’from the onset.September 20, 2010 5:31 pm at 5:31 pm #697604tikvuchkaMember
sac, I would love to also, but as a newly married person, I cant imagine having enough space in a one bedroom for me my husband a new baby and a child.September 20, 2010 5:44 pm at 5:44 pm #697605bptParticipant
I would love to see a Chol Hamoed trip gemach. Many of the trips that I have gone on (and are no longer of interest to my kids) would still be a real treat to someone else.
Often, you have a family trip that is suitable for 4 out of 6 kids, and the other 2 would have lots of fun on one of our trips. It would also allow me to send 2 of my kids on another trip, where they’ve not gone to yet (and for whatever reason, I cannot go on).
Truth is, it will never fly in a big way beause working out the details (gender, hashkofoh, ect) would be too challenging. But its still a thought. Maybe to limit it to a shul by shul basis, so at least the hashkofoh part is settled.September 20, 2010 5:47 pm at 5:47 pm #697606popa_bar_abbaParticipant
I don’t know.
What chessed organization would you like to start?September 20, 2010 6:53 pm at 6:53 pm #697607Dr. PepperParticipant
How about an organization that helps people help themselves.
I get calls all the time from people who need help putting up shades, putting together a bookcase or other small jobs that all males should be able to handle (please don’t stop calling, I love helping people). I think there should be a place where people can get basic training in using tools for minor jobs.
On a similar topic-
I had to drive an empty van to a far away city one day and back the next day. I checked luach.com a week or two beforehand to see if anyone needed a ride in either direction. Between people that needed rides or packages sent (most of them willing to pay)- there were probably 15 posts that matched the time and location. Instead of making any calls I posted that I would take as many people and packages as I could for free on a first come first serve basis.
Guess what? Not one person called.
So, before coming up with new organization, I think people have to learn how to help themselves.September 20, 2010 7:09 pm at 7:09 pm #697608SJSinNYCMember
Dr. P, that’s what I was going to post!
I think also an organization that teaches true money management. What is a “want” (like eating chicken 5 nights a week) vs “needs” (like some sort of roof over your head).
Too many people don’t have that basic concept.September 20, 2010 7:20 pm at 7:20 pm #697609Dr. PepperParticipant
What’s your beef with chicken?September 20, 2010 9:05 pm at 9:05 pm #697610Hello KittyMember
I would like to benefit from a toy gemach. Babies grow quickly and need new ones according to their age. I dont have the place and money for it. I wish I can trade some good toys with other people.September 20, 2010 9:32 pm at 9:32 pm #697611bptParticipant
If you start the organization, I can send you a terrific spreadsheet that will help project amd plan for the 95% of predictable expenses that most households experience in a 12 month cycle.
In fact, if anyone wants it before SJS launches the organization, I can send it thru YNW right now. I’ve used it for 4 years and its helped me stay underdrawn and above water.September 20, 2010 11:14 pm at 11:14 pm #697612pascha bchochmaParticipant
An organization that provides psychotherapy to people who can’t afford it.September 21, 2010 2:26 am at 2:26 am #697613
Tikvuchka – I can imagine! You dont have to do it right away, it may also be challenging if you are a relative newly-wed. I dont think I would do it either until I had more than one child, so that they would feel like they had siblings and a real family. (so many plans… lol)September 21, 2010 5:09 am at 5:09 am #697614smartcookieMember
Hello kitty- why don’t you start such a Gemach? Start small among family and friends, trade toys with them. Then add more and more people.September 21, 2010 5:15 am at 5:15 am #697615
Aren’t there therapists that accept insurance including medicaid for those who can’t afford standard insurance?September 21, 2010 5:30 am at 5:30 am #697616pascha bchochmaParticipant
Yes, but many people only want to go to a frum one. Also, insurance does not cover enough therapy, usually only the first 20 visits (people often need more than that.)September 21, 2010 11:18 am at 11:18 am #697617I can only tryMember
Aishel Shabbat is a gemach that accepts toys, clothing (including baby and child clothing), and furniture as well as miscellaneous household items. As per “Mrs. Try”, they accept pretty much anything except food. They want the donated items to be in good condition. They will give the donor a tax-deductible receipt. I don’t know their method of distribution for the items they receive, so I suggest you call them.
Aishel Shabbat 718-485-0672September 21, 2010 12:09 pm at 12:09 pm #697618aries2756Participant
I wanted to start a General Tuition Fund where askanim donated money to this fund and Yeshivas had to apply to this organization to be accepted and approved in order to get money for their students. They would have to follow guidelines and rules set by the Committee and Rabbonim involved like not throwing kids out to the street and only being allowing to kick kids out by transferring them to another Yeshiva; having a staff handbook; having staff training sessions, having staff review and report cards to make sure they are up to par etc.
When parents had trouble making tuition payments they could apply to the committee and the committee would deal with the Yeshiva and be the middleman. The parent would not have to go to the Yeshiva and beg or embarrass themselves. Once the committee finalized the “deal”, the parent would then send the payments to the “fund” and the fund would then pay the Yeshiva. Neither the parent nor the child would be embarrassed to go to Yeshiva, nor be afraid to complain if there was problems at the Yeshiva because they wouldn’t feel like second class citizens. The parents would not know how much the yeshiva would be getting in payments because they would only know how much they themselves would be putting in.
I feel that people would be more willing to donate to a general Yeshiva fund than to individual yeshivas because many people are feeling upset and angry at the way yeshivas are being run and how many kids are being treated. When donating money to a general tuition fund, you know that your money is really going to help the kids go to yeshiva and help their parents pay for their education. In the end it is a win/win situation because the Yeshivas wind up getting paid their tuition monies and the kids and parents have less of a financial stress and strain.September 21, 2010 12:39 pm at 12:39 pm #697619SJSinNYCMember
ICOT, do they take kids shoes in good condition? I have a bunch (I don’t reuse shoes between kids because I am neurotic, but they are in good usable condition) and would love to donate them somewhere.
aries, schools already have plenty of scholarship money. They don’t have enough parents willing to sacrifice to put more money into the school.September 21, 2010 12:59 pm at 12:59 pm #697620
How about a Big Sister Little Sister sort of program? king of like a mentoring situation? Like NCSY, only not.September 21, 2010 4:03 pm at 4:03 pm #697621
The organization would be ripe for more abuse. The organization will eventually dictate which frum psychologists are eligible to be used. (AKA: Frum psychologists who won’t ruffle the community status quo on abuse and will ask sheilos instead of reporting threats to life and limb). You sound young and idealistic, and stand to benefit personally (if you indeed become a psychologist) if such an organization gets off the ground. But, IT’S A BAD IDEA!September 21, 2010 4:37 pm at 4:37 pm #697622
There are 1000’s of kids that need therapy NOT HAVING ANYTHING TO DO WITH ABUSE! These kids parents can’t afford the therapy so what should happen? I don’t know the numbers of how many kids get abused but there are many other factors that would warrant a kid needing therapy these days and there are large numbers of kids not getting the help they need, so I must respectfully disagree with you and say that there could be much gained from such an organization.September 21, 2010 5:25 pm at 5:25 pm #697623cherrybimParticipant
“Yes, but many people only want to go to a frum one.”
When it comes to healing, go to the best rather than the frumest. Many well known therapists or physicians in the frum world have good PR but lousy track records. A pathology is a pathology and will be diagnosed and correctly treated by a skilled professional therapist. I have heard this advice from a respected Rav and posek.September 21, 2010 5:35 pm at 5:35 pm #697624I can only tryMember
I called the Aishel Shabbat number listed in my post and asked if they accept adult and children sized clothing and shoes.
The answer was Yes, they do.
We have donated toys, furniture and clothing thru them. We call and arrange a pick-up on the day their van is in our neighborhood.
Please call them directly if you have any further questions.
Aishel Shabbat 718-485-0672September 21, 2010 5:38 pm at 5:38 pm #697625ramateshkolianMember
I was actually going to open up a Tzedaka fund for people who need therapy. I had an idea for a system, got rabbanim and therapists involved, but I couldn’t do the fundraising. I just can’t do it, it just isn’t in my personality. I feel very guilty about it, so if anyone has that skill and wants to join forces, you can let me know.September 21, 2010 7:31 pm at 7:31 pm #697626helpthisjewMember
We just started Helpthisjew.com as a way to make it easy for everyone to help Jews in need.
In a nutshell….. Jewish people can submit their request for help online, and people from all over the world can donate a dollar or two (or more) towards the application they want to help.
Three important rules..
1. all requests must be confirmed with the applicants rabbi (which we post online before each story)
2. requests are limited to 1000 dollars
3. The problem must be fully solved for the amount requested
Examples of what we can NOT help with….
Tuition, Insurance bills, Credit card bills, ongoing expenses
Examples of what we can help with….
Teffilin for bar mitzva boy, money to buy a wedding gown, school supplies, start a gemach, one time utility bill, car repair (if its clear that this is a one time thing and you can otherwise make the payment)
Hatzlacha and BrachaSeptember 21, 2010 8:50 pm at 8:50 pm #697627
Granted there are more issues requiring therapy besides for abuse. But, sliding scale payment models already exist for qualified therapists in many non-profit organizations. Why re-invent the wheel?
These existing organizations follow to the “T” the laws on confidentiality and HIPPA. They understand that if they violate the laws, they will be fined or closed down. The Bonei Olam organization understands and follows these regulations too. They are able to tout success stories, BECAUSE the client now has a baby, so the yenta factor is over. Similarly, RCCS can tout their success stories, because their work speaks for itself. These organizations know full well that they can prove results and the funds will come.
The JEWISH PSYCH FUND won’t be able to raise funds. This is because, the yentas say show me results. Very few clients in the frum community would be willing to get up on stage and say, “Hi, I have mental illness and the JEWISH PSYCH FUND helped me”. As a result, the potential for a JPF board member or affiliated rabbi, is more likely to divulge confidential information. Too many people have learned the hard way, if you have something you don’t want people to find out about, DON’T tell a rabbi.September 22, 2010 12:47 am at 12:47 am #697628mw13Participant
truth4ruth: Great point.
aries2756: Interesting idea…
“BAD IDEA! The organization would be ripe for more abuse. The organization will eventually dictate which frum psychologists are eligible to be used. (AKA: Frum psychologists who won’t ruffle the community status quo on abuse and will ask sheilos instead of reporting threats to life and limb).”
Yeah what are they thinking, following the halacha? What do they think this is, a real religion? Sheesh, people these days…
In all seriousness, I know being totally mevatel daas to the Torah and following everything it says can be challenging at times: but is a little respect too much to ask for?
“I was actually going to open up a Tzedaka fund for people who need therapy. I had an idea for a system, got rabbanim and therapists involved, but I couldn’t do the fundraising.”
Out of curiosity, what was the system?September 22, 2010 3:43 am at 3:43 am #697629
The Torah both B’Ksav and Baal Peh, as well as contemporary poskim say clearly that in situations where there are dangers to life and limb, it’s a chiyuv to protect the victim. This means even if the abuser is the Rosh Hakohol’s son, or the most popular rebbe, it’s a chiyuv to stop his behaviors. The therapist who hears such information has a chiyuv to report it. Apparently Rav Elyashiv is a small fry in your eyes…have a little respect!
Situations of domestic abuse and battery, molestation, etc., the proper authority to deal with the situation is the police. This is a specialized field that rabbanim are untrained for, no matter how many Nefesh lectures they attended.September 22, 2010 4:57 am at 4:57 am #697630mw13Participant
artchill: I did not, and do not, claim that the halacha protects abusers. However, I take offense at your casual dismissal of those frum therapists who “ask sheilos”. You make it sound as though we should follow the halacha only in cases where it commands what we already want to hear: but if it says not to report abuse to the secular authorities (which again, I’m not saying it does), then we should CH”V do what we feel is “right” over the halacha. As a frum jew, I firmly believe that the halacha must take precedence over every other factor, be it emotional or legal, when making decisions. Period.
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