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51. unique
    Just Like Everyone Else

    i'm new at this, so please tell me what you think.
    this one is about beginnings.

    The baby cries, the mothers relieved,
    a new life, in a moment began

    she peeked into her classroom, with her brand new knapsack,
    a new school, in a moment began

    lugging her suitcase to her bunkhouse,she breathes in the fresh air,
    a new summer experience, in a moment began

    "And we should meet in Jerusalem next year," she finishes off her bat-mitzva speech, amid hugs and pictures she breathes a sigh of relief
    a new stage in life, in a moment began

    the insecure teenager hesitantly opens the door
    a different school, in a moment began

    after setting up her bed and shelves, she turns to her new roommates and offers them a friendly smile,
    a new dorming experience, in a moment began

    clapping politely as the plane touches down, the new couple smile at each other,
    a new life in a strange country, in a moment began

    a baby cries, a mothers relieved,
    a cycle in a moment COMPLETE.

    Posted 2 years ago #

52. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    Here's another one:

    A True Friend

    When I was little
    I was sure
    A true friend is
    She who's snack is ample.
    When I was in elementary
    I was sure
    A true friend is
    She who's brilliant
    A student sample.
    When I was a freshman
    I was sure
    A true friend is
    She who laughs without a care.
    When I was a sophomore
    I was sure
    A true friend is
    She who's serious, deep and rare.
    When I was a junior
    I was sure
    A true friend is
    She who shares everything.
    Now I'm a senior
    What a true friend is
    I know nothing.

    Posted 2 years ago #

53. mytake
    Member

    observanteen

    Like it.

    Posted 2 years ago #

54. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    mytake: Thanks!
    Hey, everyone keep 'em coming! I love this thread!

    Posted 2 years ago #

55. GumBall
    Oh Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Um everyone i stink at writing poems but baruch hashem i have other talents....oh...i could make up a poem lets not 4get that but lk it wont come out so gr8!! lol

    Posted 2 years ago #

56. unique
    Just Like Everyone Else

    okay, so this poem is about saving lives. please, please tell me your thoughts and opinions... i would love to hear them

    AND THE HEART KEEPS PUMPING...

    car crashing
    glass shattering
    emergency workers running
    and the heart keeps pumping...

    toddler exploring
    foot slipping
    mother catching
    and the heart keeps pumping

    man chuckling
    peanut blocking
    passerby reacting
    and the heart keeps pumping...

    girl splashing
    brother thrashing
    lifeguard diving
    and the heart keeps pumping...

    Posted 2 years ago #

57. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    unique: You're poems are definitely unique!

    Posted 2 years ago #

58. brotherofurs
    formula 4 happiness: Attitude of gratitude, Emunah, Giving

    cool i love them, you guys are amazingly talennted!! observanteen and unique!

    Posted 2 years ago #

59. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    I wrote this one when I came to realize that everything is from Hashem and everything He does is for the very best:

    Get Well Soon

    The sharp blade
    Made its way
    Toward my heart.
    It cut
    Punctured
    Sliced.
    My heart-
    It was
    Wounded
    Aching
    Hurting.
    There was
    Blood gushing.
    I was
    Scared
    Frightened
    Terrified.
    Why
    Oh, why
    Is this
    Happening?
    Who
    Had dared
    To cut
    My heart
    Open?
    I was
    Mad
    Upset
    Furious.
    Who
    Has the heart
    To wound
    Mine?
    I was
    Confused
    Bewildered
    Frustrated.
    The pain
    Oh, the pain.
    Will the bleeding
    Ever stop?
    Will the wounds
    Ever heal?
    Will the torn parts
    Ever be reconnected?
    I stared
    At the knife
    At my side.
    My killer.
    I examined
    Carefully
    That awful blade.
    It was
    That of
    A surgeons'.

    Posted 2 years ago #

60. unique
    Just Like Everyone Else

    observanteen: Wow! so powerful! i really like that style in writing.

    Posted 2 years ago #

61. PrincessEagle
    Flying High

    Danching girl, Bewashere, Bro Observanteen, emitrose, bygirl93 / m, Brucklyn Jewess, unique - wow, you've put some excellent pieces on here! Kudos!
    Unique - i like the one you just put on the heart pumping.. And observanteen on the Surgeon's knife.. Bewashere you wrote a beautiful one on having lost one's way but G-d is still with us..
    Thought you may want to hear some feedback so am giving you!
    i'm very hesitation to post my writing on here - it's way too public!! So for now i'm just lurking :-)

    Posted 2 years ago #

62. dancinggirl
    Just dance everything's gonna be okay!!

    wow! oberservantteen i loveed your poem! it was so raw with feelings...did anyone like my poem 'there is no justice...?' i really wnna hear feadback!

    Posted 2 years ago #

63. dancinggirl
    Just dance everything's gonna be okay!!

    heres another

    Where is happiness
    that careless feeling
    of being free?
    it alludes me
    throwing a teesing wave
    then darting away.
    but when
    i do catch it,
    it is wonderful
    a blossoming rose
    a blissful touch
    an open door
    filled with chances
    hopes
    dreams
    visions of something better
    what can be
    what I can be
    if ijust hold on

    Posted 2 years ago #

64. PrincessEagle
    Flying High

    Dancing girl - this one is great, it's really good!
    Just checked the other one you asked about - it's also good!! You have a nice way of writing :-)

    Posted 2 years ago #

65. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    Thanks everyone! I liked yours, dancinggirl.

    Posted 2 years ago #

66. Bwashere
    Member

    Wow! All of ur Poems were amazing.
    Dancinggirl I love love love both of your poems.
    Observanteen yours was awesome too- I totally understand that.
    I have more to post and I'll try and post later :)

    Posted 2 years ago #

67. Bwashere
    Member

    I hear it,
    the silence
    The empty air,
    surrounding my head.
    I feel it,
    the tension
    The rising anger,
    trapped in my skin.
    I see it,
    the line
    The long division,
    planted between us.
    I'm in it,
    the lie
    The "perfect" bubble,
    that only haunts me.
    Can I break the silence,
    and bring in new air?
    Can I break the tension,
    make it dissapear?
    Csn I break the line,
    that I'm forced to see?
    Can I break the bubble,
    thats been defining me?
    No.
    It takes two to talk,
    so I'm silent.
    With no place to scream,
    I'm left feeling tense.
    There's a clear division,
    so I drew a line.
    You have created a lie,
    and I'm left in a bubble.
    If you break the silence,
    then I'll break mine.
    If you break the tension,
    I'll slowly relax.
    If you break the line,
    then I'll know things are ok.
    I'm living in a bubble,
    thats waiting to be popped.

    Let me know what you think...

    Posted 2 years ago #

68. Bwashere
    Member

    This one has a tune in my head and obviously needs work...

    Its a new day,
    but it feels the same
    The clock is ticking,
    but the time won't change
    Its like yesterday,
    thats stuck on pause
    Nothing gained,
    yet nothing lost
    Try to jump ahead,
    but life stands still
    Try to rewind,
    try and make this real
    But remember,
    don't get stuck in time
    This is your chance,
    so make it right.
    Its a new day,
    don't make it the same
    The clock is ticking,
    its time to change
    You had yesterday,
    so don't press pause
    Don't live in the past,
    and don't get lost
    Now you're ahead,
    so don't stand still
    It's your life,
    Its yours to reveal.

    Posted 2 years ago #

69. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    Bwashere your poems are really beautiful. I can really relate to the first one, although my "bubble" already burst;)

    Posted 2 years ago #

70. Bwashere
    Member

    Aww thanks, glad u like them

    Posted 2 years ago #

71. eclipse
    The Human

    I know that words are just ABC
    And that paper is part of a tree
    But the mean and cruel words FAMILY wrote me
    Made me feel as if somebody smote me

    I read it again:Was this real?
    Do these people know how to feel?
    Mean and accusing,Olam haba they're losing
    My tears and deep pain,Hashem,heal!

    Posted 2 years ago #

72. eclipse
    The Human

    Thank you,Hashem,for the wonderful,compassionate friends (IN REAL LIFE!)
    whose validating and strengthening words got me through this day.

    Posted 2 years ago #

73. am yisrael chai
    We await your rejoining us!

    Hashem, please help our dear friend, Eclipse
    Who never has a mean word pass her lips
    She goes through struggles with dignity and class
    Despite her detractors who have written en masse
    Trying to disparage her and cause her pain
    Doing it viciously with much disdain
    Please let her have peace in her life
    Away from all scandal and strife
    Please give her such a big bracha
    With tons of nachas and lots of hatzlacha

    Posted 2 years ago #

74. eclipse
    The Human

    Thank you,am yisrael chai!

    Posted 2 years ago #

75. dancinggirl
    Just dance everything's gonna be okay!!

    come on ppl, i want to read more!

    Posted 2 years ago #

76. GumBall
    Oh Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I really stink at making poems
    Even though ppl live in homes
    When my teacher tells us to make
    I feel lk im at stake
    And when i try
    I just give a sigh
    Ehl oh Ehl!!

    Posted 2 years ago #

77. dancinggirl
    Just dance everything's gonna be okay!!

    mmm, thnx gumball!

    Posted 2 years ago #

78. GumBall
    Oh Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Huh dancinggirl?? urwelx but why??

    Posted 2 years ago #

79. pcs
    Member

    heres one i just found-i aint gotta clue when i wrote it!!!

    i used to walk alone
    and see things through my eyes
    alone i told my problems
    and answered all my whys

    i always did things solo
    my help was all i got
    the burden was on my shoulders
    no matter how hard the lot

    and i used to keep on wishing
    for one dream to come true
    and my dream was finally answered
    it was given in the form of you!!!

    Posted 2 years ago #

80. WolfishMusings
    The Wolf

    This little shnuk
    doesn't have anything
    useful to say

    The Wolf

    Posted 2 years ago #

81. emlf
    Energy & Mineral Law Foundation

    Glad to know and glad to see
    That there's a "market" for poetry
    And even though poetry doesn't seem to sell
    This thread in CR is really swell.

    CROWNS

    Crowns -
    Symbols of majesty.
    Signs of royalty.
    Marks of distinction.
    Crowns -
    Given to a priveleged few.
    Reserved for those of noble rank.
    Unique for their recepients.
    Two Crowns -
    Each and every Yid
    Part of the Am Segula
    For stating Na’ase V’nishma.
    Three types of Crowns -
    Keser Torah
    Keser Kehuna
    Keser Malchus.
    One Crown
    Keser Shaim Tov
    Accessible to us all
    If we make ourselves worthy.

    Posted 2 years ago #

82. dancinggirl
    Just dance everything's gonna be okay!!

    wow! i love the new ones emlf and pcs!

    Posted 2 years ago #

83. Little Sally Saucer
    Sitting in the water

    yeah...i luv them 2!!!!
    i was thinking about posting my poetry here...
    but its WAY too personal...sorry dancinggirl ;)

    Posted 2 years ago #

84. Little Sally Saucer
    Sitting in the water

    k dancinggirl i decided to be nice and post one so i looked through my writings and found one i could post...

    i wrote this one after a few months of trying to keep up with one of my friends but it wasn't working out to good-in the end we got into a huge fight and broke up

    Time was playing a game with us
    we we're each on the edge of a rope
    pulling and pushing back and forth
    but one left, and one looked for hope

    time was playing a game with us
    follow the leader it said
    but when one turned toward the wrong path
    the other continued and led

    time was playing a game with us
    red light,green light, 1,2,3
    but when she turned around- no one was seen
    where cud the friends that were playing be?

    time was playing a game with us
    simple simon says
    but when one did right and followed the man
    the other couldn't care less

    time was playing agame with us
    mother may i, please?
    but when one hopped foward 7 times
    the other turns and flees

    time has stopped playing games with us
    his games are no longer fun
    the game was time against true love
    and time has sadly won ;(

    Posted 2 years ago #

85. emlf
    Energy & Mineral Law Foundation

    NIGHT

    Night -
    Cold and bleak?
    Come take a peek -
    Time to seek.

    Night -
    Torah learning
    Lamps long burning
    Yearning and earning.

    Night -
    Introspection
    Thoughful reflection
    Plan of correction.

    Night -
    Tikun Chatzos
    For what we miss most
    Longing to be close.

    Night -
    Full of fright
    Yet goals in sight
    Soon a Day so bright.

    Posted 2 years ago #

86. Huyde LaHashem
    Member

    little sally, i love tht poem! its so...unique. it tells a story

    Posted 2 years ago #

87. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    Little Sally Saucer: I like your poem. BTW, welcome to the CR:)

    Posted 2 years ago #

88. Little Sally Saucer
    Sitting in the water

    woa!!!! my egos soaringggggg lol

    thanks hudya and observanteen...!

    n observant teen...-welcome to the vast world of LITTLE SALLY SAUCER loll

    Posted 2 years ago #

89. Huyde LaHashem
    Member

    EGO ALERT

    Posted 2 years ago #

90. Little Sally Saucer
    Sitting in the water

    thanks 4 the warning...

    Posted 2 years ago #

91. Huyde LaHashem
    Member

    no prob

    Posted 2 years ago #

92. Bwashere
    Member

    Let me know what you think...

    I focus on you,
    And I don't know what to say
    I'm familiar with what I see,
    the look of crying and dismay.
    Although she wants to hide it,
    It's the color of my mothers eyes
    Hidden under the happiness,
    Which she wears as a disguise.
    It's the face of my friend,
    Lost and alone
    Overpowered by the drugs,
    No emotion being shown.
    It's the person in the mirror,
    Who once felt the same
    Overuled by the tension,
    Trapped inside the pain.
    I see the look in your eyes,
    How you just want to slip away
    Forget about tomorrow,
    And end it all today.
    But just because thugs are hard,
    And you're scared to move along
    Don't let that one fear,
    Keep you from staying strong.

    Posted 2 years ago #

93. Little Sally Saucer
    Sitting in the water

    woa bweshere!! POWERFUL!

    Posted 2 years ago #

94. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    Here's one I wrote today. (I started during class but my teacher typically took it away..;))

    Round Trip

    The world
    Big, round and wide
    Had seemed to push me
    Off its side.
    I felt too sheltered
    Of narrow mind
    So cut off
    Of mankind.

    The world winked
    With its glamorous glitz
    I felt deprived
    At the end of my wits.
    Like a red cloth
    Waved at a bull
    The world urged me
    To end the life so dull.

    A new life
    I was going to lead
    For the glorious future
    Plant a seed.
    I would conquer
    A world so vast
    True happiness
    I'll reach at last.

    But in my mouth
    There was a bitter taste
    I was disappointed
    It was all a waste.
    There was no meaning
    There was no goal
    For I failed
    To tend to my soul.

    I packed my belongings
    And turned to leave
    My long lost Emunah
    I will now retrieve.
    I'll return to the roots
    I've once betrayed
    And for the first time
    Really prayed.

    I am now sheltered
    Once again
    But now I know
    I've found a bargain.

    Posted 2 years ago #

95. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    I wrote this one this past Friday when feeling like this year (which was a tough one and a growth experience for me) is almost gone. (I also wrote it as a chizuk to remember "Gam zeh yaavor - this too, will pass".)

    The years they fly
    Quickly by
    As if in a race
    Time to chase.
    The oceans I've cried
    Are now dried;
    My mad rage
    Is of old age;
    Of my resentment
    There isn't a fragment;
    The surging pain
    Didn't remain;
    The time I was embarrassed
    Has long since passed;
    Of that hurtful remark
    There isn't a mark.
    Those times are gone
    Time to move on
    Leave the memories behind
    For new ones to find
    Only now they won't annoy
    But bring happiness and joy! (I hope so!)

    Posted 2 years ago #

96. PrincessEagle
    Flying High

    Bwashere - WOW!! You write so well, this piece says so much!
    Observanteen, It's good, really good. The "Round Trip" one i esp. like.. How far did you go to find out it's all a waste?! And yes, time will always pass for good or bad!!!!

    Posted 2 years ago #

97. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    PE: Thanks. I'll leave that up to your imagination;)

    Posted 2 years ago #

98. person3
    Member

    Sometimes, at times
    Seems black as night
    Bleakness ahead
    And nothing seems right

    Forlorn, forsaken
    Bereft, despair
    Sorrow, sadness
    Too much to bear

    Deep, drawn
    Despondent, down
    Misery, gloomy
    Perpetual frown

    Confused as to why
    Emotions arrive
    Logically happy
    To just be alive

    An inkling, a clue
    To their source unknown
    Glimmering glimpses
    Occasionally shown

    Figure it out
    A mysterious glow
    A secret so hidden
    Can’t dare to show

    Can hope can dream
    But keep all inside
    Tormented emotions
    All hidden inside

    But Hashem
    Understands
    Just where
    I stand

    He can help
    He can care
    With Him
    I can share

    For Him
    I entrust
    As unburden
    I must

    Tatty knows
    Tatty cares
    I cry
    Tatty hears

    He hugs
    He protects
    Caresses
    Holds me erect

    Comforts my soul
    Endows me with strength
    Will help me through this dark
    Whatever its length

    Posted 2 years ago #

99. observanteen
    trying to shteig in midos

    Who Are You?

    You catch my eye
    As you pass by
    I look at you
    I see you...
    Yet, do I?

    Do I see your pain
    Your sorrow and dread?
    Do I see the road
    On which you tread?
    Do I see youur character
    Your unique personality?
    Do I see your virtues
    Your true quality?
    Do I see what scares you
    What makes you fear?
    Do I see what upsets you
    What makes you drop a tear?
    Do I see your disputes
    You disagreements?
    Do I see your hard work
    Your great achievements?
    Do I see the great nisayon
    You've overcome?
    Do I see where
    You're coming from?

    I look at your side
    As on you stride
    Who are you?
    What are you?
    What do you hide?

    Posted 2 years ago #

100. person3
     Member

     observanteen

     I like your poem - it's true - it's so easy to disregard people who have so much depth and so many qualities...

     Posted 2 years ago #

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