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    i’m new at this, so please tell me what you think.

    this one is about beginnings.

    The baby cries, the mothers relieved,

    a new life, in a moment began

    she peeked into her classroom, with her brand new knapsack,

    a new school, in a moment began

    lugging her suitcase to her bunkhouse,she breathes in the fresh air,

    a new summer experience, in a moment began

    “And we should meet in Jerusalem next year,” she finishes off her bat-mitzva speech, amid hugs and pictures she breathes a sigh of relief

    a new stage in life, in a moment began

    the insecure teenager hesitantly opens the door

    a different school, in a moment began

    after setting up her bed and shelves, she turns to her new roommates and offers them a friendly smile,

    a new dorming experience, in a moment began

    clapping politely as the plane touches down, the new couple smile at each other,

    a new life in a strange country, in a moment began

    a baby cries, a mothers relieved,

    a cycle in a moment COMPLETE.


    Here’s another one:

    A True Friend

    When I was little

    I was sure

    A true friend is

    She who’s snack is ample.

    When I was in elementary

    I was sure

    A true friend is

    She who’s brilliant

    A student sample.

    When I was a freshman

    I was sure

    A true friend is

    She who laughs without a care.

    When I was a sophomore

    I was sure

    A true friend is

    She who’s serious, deep and rare.

    When I was a junior

    I was sure

    A true friend is

    She who shares everything.

    Now I’m a senior

    What a true friend is

    I know nothing.



    Like it.


    mytake: Thanks!

    Hey, everyone keep ’em coming! I love this thread!


    Um everyone i stink at writing poems but baruch hashem i have other talents….oh…i could make up a poem lets not 4get that but lk it wont come out so gr8!! lol


    okay, so this poem is about saving lives. please, please tell me your thoughts and opinions… i would love to hear them


    car crashing

    glass shattering

    emergency workers running

    and the heart keeps pumping…

    toddler exploring

    foot slipping

    mother catching

    and the heart keeps pumping

    man chuckling

    peanut blocking

    passerby reacting

    and the heart keeps pumping…

    girl splashing

    brother thrashing

    lifeguard diving

    and the heart keeps pumping…


    unique: You’re poems are definitely unique!


    cool i love them, you guys are amazingly talennted!! observanteen and unique!


    I wrote this one when I came to realize that everything is from Hashem and everything He does is for the very best:

    Get Well Soon

    The sharp blade

    Made its way

    Toward my heart.

    It cut



    My heart-

    It was




    There was

    Blood gushing.

    I was





    Oh, why

    Is this



    Had dared

    To cut

    My heart


    I was





    Has the heart

    To wound


    I was




    The pain

    Oh, the pain.

    Will the bleeding

    Ever stop?

    Will the wounds

    Ever heal?

    Will the torn parts

    Ever be reconnected?

    I stared

    At the knife

    At my side.

    My killer.

    I examined


    That awful blade.

    It was

    That of

    A surgeons’.


    observanteen: Wow! so powerful! i really like that style in writing.


    Danching girl, Bewashere, Bro Observanteen, emitrose, bygirl93 / m, Brucklyn Jewess, unique – wow, you’ve put some excellent pieces on here! Kudos!

    Unique – i like the one you just put on the heart pumping.. And observanteen on the Surgeon’s knife.. Bewashere you wrote a beautiful one on having lost one’s way but G-d is still with us..

    Thought you may want to hear some feedback so am giving you!

    i’m very hesitation to post my writing on here – it’s way too public!! So for now i’m just lurking 🙂


    wow! oberservantteen i loveed your poem! it was so raw with feelings…did anyone like my poem ‘there is no justice…?’ i really wnna hear feadback!


    heres another

    Where is happiness

    that careless feeling

    of being free?

    it alludes me

    throwing a teesing wave

    then darting away.

    but when

    i do catch it,

    it is wonderful

    a blossoming rose

    a blissful touch

    an open door

    filled with chances



    visions of something better

    what can be

    what I can be

    if ijust hold on


    Dancing girl – this one is great, it’s really good!

    Just checked the other one you asked about – it’s also good!! You have a nice way of writing 🙂


    Thanks everyone! I liked yours, dancinggirl.


    Wow! All of ur Poems were amazing.

    Dancinggirl I love love love both of your poems.

    Observanteen yours was awesome too- I totally understand that.

    I have more to post and I’ll try and post later 🙂


    I hear it,

    the silence

    The empty air,

    surrounding my head.

    I feel it,

    the tension

    The rising anger,

    trapped in my skin.

    I see it,

    the line

    The long division,

    planted between us.

    I’m in it,

    the lie

    The “perfect” bubble,

    that only haunts me.

    Can I break the silence,

    and bring in new air?

    Can I break the tension,

    make it dissapear?

    Csn I break the line,

    that I’m forced to see?

    Can I break the bubble,

    thats been defining me?


    It takes two to talk,

    so I’m silent.

    With no place to scream,

    I’m left feeling tense.

    There’s a clear division,

    so I drew a line.

    You have created a lie,

    and I’m left in a bubble.

    If you break the silence,

    then I’ll break mine.

    If you break the tension,

    I’ll slowly relax.

    If you break the line,

    then I’ll know things are ok.

    I’m living in a bubble,

    thats waiting to be popped.

    Let me know what you think…


    This one has a tune in my head and obviously needs work…

    Its a new day,

    but it feels the same

    The clock is ticking,

    but the time won’t change

    Its like yesterday,

    thats stuck on pause

    Nothing gained,

    yet nothing lost

    Try to jump ahead,

    but life stands still

    Try to rewind,

    try and make this real

    But remember,

    don’t get stuck in time

    This is your chance,

    so make it right.

    Its a new day,

    don’t make it the same

    The clock is ticking,

    its time to change

    You had yesterday,

    so don’t press pause

    Don’t live in the past,

    and don’t get lost

    Now you’re ahead,

    so don’t stand still

    It’s your life,

    Its yours to reveal.


    Bwashere your poems are really beautiful. I can really relate to the first one, although my “bubble” already burst;)


    Aww thanks, glad u like them


    I know that words are just ABC

    And that paper is part of a tree

    But the mean and cruel words FAMILY wrote me

    Made me feel as if somebody smote me

    I read it again:Was this real?

    Do these people know how to feel?

    Mean and accusing,Olam haba they’re losing

    My tears and deep pain,Hashem,heal!


    Thank you,Hashem,for the wonderful,compassionate friends (IN REAL LIFE!)

    whose validating and strengthening words got me through this day.

    am yisrael chai

    Hashem, please help our dear friend, Eclipse

    Who never has a mean word pass her lips

    She goes through struggles with dignity and class

    Despite her detractors who have written en masse

    Trying to disparage her and cause her pain

    Doing it viciously with much disdain

    Please let her have peace in her life

    Away from all scandal and strife

    Please give her such a big bracha

    With tons of nachas and lots of hatzlacha


    Thank you,am yisrael chai!


    come on ppl, i want to read more!


    I really stink at making poems

    Even though ppl live in homes

    When my teacher tells us to make

    I feel lk im at stake

    And when i try

    I just give a sigh

    Ehl oh Ehl!!


    mmm, thnx gumball!


    Huh dancinggirl?? urwelx but why??


    heres one i just found-i aint gotta clue when i wrote it!!!

    i used to walk alone

    and see things through my eyes

    alone i told my problems

    and answered all my whys

    i always did things solo

    my help was all i got

    the burden was on my shoulders

    no matter how hard the lot

    and i used to keep on wishing

    for one dream to come true

    and my dream was finally answered

    it was given in the form of you!!!


    This little shnuk

    doesn’t have anything

    useful to say

    The Wolf


    Glad to know and glad to see

    That there’s a “market” for poetry

    And even though poetry doesn’t seem to sell

    This thread in CR is really swell.


    Crowns –

    Symbols of majesty.

    Signs of royalty.

    Marks of distinction.

    Crowns –

    Given to a priveleged few.

    Reserved for those of noble rank.

    Unique for their recepients.

    Two Crowns –

    Each and every Yid

    Part of the Am Segula

    Three types of Crowns –

    Keser Torah

    Keser Kehuna

    Keser Malchus.

    One Crown

    Keser Shaim Tov

    Accessible to us all

    If we make ourselves worthy.


    wow! i love the new ones emlf and pcs!


    yeah…i luv them 2!!!!

    i was thinking about posting my poetry here…

    but its WAY too personal…sorry dancinggirl 😉


    k dancinggirl i decided to be nice and post one so i looked through my writings and found one i could post…

    i wrote this one after a few months of trying to keep up with one of my friends but it wasn’t working out to good-in the end we got into a huge fight and broke up

    Time was playing a game with us

    we we’re each on the edge of a rope

    pulling and pushing back and forth

    but one left, and one looked for hope

    time was playing a game with us

    follow the leader it said

    but when one turned toward the wrong path

    the other continued and led

    time was playing a game with us

    red light,green light, 1,2,3

    but when she turned around- no one was seen

    where cud the friends that were playing be?

    time was playing a game with us

    simple simon says

    but when one did right and followed the man

    the other couldn’t care less

    time was playing agame with us

    mother may i, please?

    but when one hopped foward 7 times

    the other turns and flees

    time has stopped playing games with us

    his games are no longer fun

    the game was time against true love

    and time has sadly won ;(



    Night –

    Cold and bleak?

    Come take a peek –

    Time to seek.

    Night –

    Torah learning

    Lamps long burning

    Yearning and earning.

    Night –


    Thoughful reflection

    Plan of correction.

    Night –

    Tikun Chatzos

    For what we miss most

    Longing to be close.

    Night –

    Full of fright

    Yet goals in sight

    Soon a Day so bright.


    little sally, i love tht poem! its so…unique. it tells a story


    Little Sally Saucer: I like your poem. BTW, welcome to the CR:)


    woa!!!! my egos soaringggggg lol

    thanks hudya and observanteen…!

    n observant teen…-welcome to the vast world of LITTLE SALLY SAUCER loll




    thanks 4 the warning…


    no prob


    Let me know what you think…

    I focus on you,

    And I don’t know what to say

    I’m familiar with what I see,

    the look of crying and dismay.

    Although she wants to hide it,

    It’s the color of my mothers eyes

    Hidden under the happiness,

    Which she wears as a disguise.

    It’s the face of my friend,

    Lost and alone

    Overpowered by the drugs,

    No emotion being shown.

    It’s the person in the mirror,

    Who once felt the same

    Overuled by the tension,

    Trapped inside the pain.

    I see the look in your eyes,

    How you just want to slip away

    Forget about tomorrow,

    And end it all today.

    But just because thugs are hard,

    And you’re scared to move along

    Don’t let that one fear,

    Keep you from staying strong.


    woa bweshere!! POWERFUL!


    Here’s one I wrote today. (I started during class but my teacher typically took it away..;))

    Round Trip

    The world

    Big, round and wide

    Had seemed to push me

    Off its side.

    I felt too sheltered

    Of narrow mind

    So cut off

    Of mankind.

    The world winked

    With its glamorous glitz

    I felt deprived

    At the end of my wits.

    Like a red cloth

    Waved at a bull

    The world urged me

    To end the life so dull.

    A new life

    I was going to lead

    For the glorious future

    Plant a seed.

    I would conquer

    A world so vast

    True happiness

    I’ll reach at last.

    But in my mouth

    There was a bitter taste

    I was disappointed

    It was all a waste.

    There was no meaning

    There was no goal

    For I failed

    To tend to my soul.

    I packed my belongings

    And turned to leave

    My long lost Emunah

    I will now retrieve.

    I’ll return to the roots

    I’ve once betrayed

    And for the first time

    Really prayed.

    I am now sheltered

    Once again

    But now I know

    I’ve found a bargain.


    I wrote this one this past Friday when feeling like this year (which was a tough one and a growth experience for me) is almost gone. (I also wrote it as a chizuk to remember “Gam zeh yaavor – this too, will pass”.)

    The years they fly

    Quickly by

    As if in a race

    Time to chase.

    The oceans I’ve cried

    Are now dried;

    My mad rage

    Is of old age;

    Of my resentment

    There isn’t a fragment;

    The surging pain

    Didn’t remain;

    The time I was embarrassed

    Has long since passed;

    Of that hurtful remark

    There isn’t a mark.

    Those times are gone

    Time to move on

    Leave the memories behind

    For new ones to find

    Only now they won’t annoy

    But bring happiness and joy! (I hope so!)


    Bwashere – WOW!! You write so well, this piece says so much!

    Observanteen, It’s good, really good. The “Round Trip” one i esp. like.. How far did you go to find out it’s all a waste?! And yes, time will always pass for good or bad!!!!


    PE: Thanks. I’ll leave that up to your imagination;)


    Sometimes, at times

    Seems black as night

    Bleakness ahead

    And nothing seems right

    Forlorn, forsaken

    Bereft, despair

    Sorrow, sadness

    Too much to bear

    Deep, drawn

    Despondent, down

    Misery, gloomy

    Perpetual frown

    Confused as to why

    Emotions arrive

    Logically happy

    To just be alive

    An inkling, a clue

    To their source unknown

    Glimmering glimpses

    Occasionally shown

    Figure it out

    A mysterious glow

    A secret so hidden

    Can hope can dream

    But keep all inside

    Tormented emotions

    All hidden inside

    But Hashem


    Just where

    I stand

    He can help

    He can care

    With Him

    I can share

    For Him

    I entrust

    As unburden

    I must

    Tatty knows

    Tatty cares

    I cry

    Tatty hears

    He hugs

    He protects


    Holds me erect

    Comforts my soul

    Endows me with strength

    Will help me through this dark

    Whatever its length


    Who Are You?

    You catch my eye

    As you pass by

    I look at you

    I see you…

    Yet, do I?

    Do I see your pain

    Your sorrow and dread?

    Do I see the road

    On which you tread?

    Do I see youur character

    Your unique personality?

    Do I see your virtues

    Your true quality?

    Do I see what scares you

    What makes you fear?

    Do I see what upsets you

    What makes you drop a tear?

    Do I see your disputes

    You disagreements?

    Do I see your hard work

    Your great achievements?

    Do I see the great nisayon

    You’ve overcome?

    Do I see where

    You’re coming from?

    I look at your side

    As on you stride

    Who are you?

    What are you?

    What do you hide?



    I like your poem – it’s true – it’s so easy to disregard people who have so much depth and so many qualities…

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