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Posts
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“by the way everyone, check out the new joke of the day”
asdfghjkl- just read yours… red, purple, orange, green & blue would insufficiently describe the colors my face turned while reading that. Wow- I haven’t laughed that hard in a loooong time. Thanks
My absolute favorite email (I don’t care how stupid or immature it sounds) is the one with a list of about 10 things to do in the office to make yourself sound/look insane. Some of them are:
Page yourself over the intercom system
Sit in your cubicle with a blow-dryer and every time someone passes, point it at them and yell “Freeze! Hands up!”
Spread mosquito netting over your desk and play safari soundtrack…………….
feivel, actually they changed it a few times this week
asdfghjkl,
I agree with areivim. I was starting to laugh out loud literally and I don’t want anyone to think I’ve lost my mind so I had to stop in the middle. I’ll try to finish reading it at home tonight. thanks for the laugh!
btw feivel,
how did you get your response to be blue? that’s cool!
hey feivel, how’d you do that to those words?
now that we both asked him, watch him hold it against us and not tell…
by the way, thanks for all those tips yesterday, charlie.
hey charlie! how you been? I need some serious help- I think I’m disintegrating into one big emotional ball with all this deep stuff with moish
which tips? I’m having a senior moment here. totally blank.
moish
like this:
lets say you want “moish in blue
moish, charles:
you type the following:
<x>moish</x>
except you dont use “x” as the letter, you use “a” i couldnt use “a” in the example i showed you because then it would just show as a blue “moish” and you wouldnt be able to see what i did
get it?
areivim,
you’re doing an amazing job but you are not doing moish or yourself a favor by disintegrating, you gotta chill out. Moish as it is has a hard time with the concept of virtual friends, how will he handle disintegrated virtual friends?
(just kidding, moish) 🙂
moish, now I remember!
thanks, charlie. i knew i could count on you.
by the way, i hate to be a party pooper, but we are officially way off topic
you need an aid, dude
oops, you’re right. I think you should become a mod!
hey asdf- i know ur not on now but im not worried when u come on later that u will catch up…so check out the joke of the day(which actually has been changing the past few days) and see how much the editor liked ur joke
charlie, if this website stoops to the level that they’d make me a moderator, i think it would be completely unnecessary to have moderating period.
squeak
That is so cool! how do I make my words blue?
blue<like this?/a>
Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs. Fenton insists her husband
go with her to Wal-Mart, but he gets bored with all the shopping
trips. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to
browse.
Here’s a letter sent to Mrs. Fenton from the management of the local Wal-Mart :
Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban
both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our
video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are
listed below.
Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Wal-Mart:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of foot deoderant and randomly put them in people’s
carts when they weren’t looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at
5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
‘Code 3’ in house wares….. and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M’s
on lay away.
6. September 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told
other shoppers he’d invite them in if they’ll bring pillows from the
bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to
cry and asks, ‘Why can’t you people just leave me alone?’
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a
mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked
the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming
the ” Mission Impossible” theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, sang Happy Birthday while wearing different sized funnels on his head for birthday hats.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse
through, yelled “PICK ME!” “PICK ME!”
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumes the fetal position and screams “NO ! NO! It’s those voices
again!!!!”
And last, but not least ……
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, then yelled very loudly, “There is no toilet paper in here!”
Regards,
Wal-Mart
teen: my bad-I am sorry i don’t really understand what ur talking about.
oh my bad oj its <x>ur words here</x> and substitute the x for the letter a
if i wrote it correctly it would look like this your words here
belev echad: nice one, but i think it wwas asdfghjkl, who posted a similar one.$
Please move this discussion here – http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/the-laboratory-ii-try-your-html-and-ascii-art-experiments-here
E = MC2 is energy = morning cofee squared 😛
compliments of my brother
coke not pepsi: thanx so much for letting me know my joke became the joke of the day!!! i got so excited whebn ya told me!!! aparantly he[mr. editor] must have read all the great ratings my joke got-everyone said they were rolling on the floor laughing!!!!
moish01: it became the joke of the day cause the editor look it from my post on this thread!!!!
areivimzehlazeh & charlie brown: the editor also loved my joke & made it the joke of the day!!! score for asdfghjkl!!!!!!!!!!
Editor- congratulations. You officially made asdfghjkl’s day, month, year, decade
beacon: he sure did!!!!
“If you look good and dress well, you don’t need a purpose in life. ” a great quote i heard
wow asdfghjkl looks like they liked it so much they made it quote of the day 😛
teen lol
yay I WAS POST 500!!!!
coke not pepsi: ha it says your post #501!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
asdfghjkl – I just fixed the problem, I randomly deleted one of your previous posts… so… now coke not pepsi is #500!!! :o) YW Moderator-72
asdf -u scared me 4 a sec lol
look at the post b4 that 1
that was really weird it went from 502 posts to 501 but it doesn’t matter bec b”h i posted twice in a row
mod 72-lol
mod72: that was so not nice!!!!!!!!!!!!
:o) I knew you wouldn’t mind :o) YW Moderator-72
btw – the post was: “teen: i noticed!!! join the fun!!!!!” Posted 2 days ago. OK… see I put it back in for you (just here after post 500 not before)
mod72: ouch, that was mean.$ 🙂
mod72: oh so you do have a heart after all!!!!!
a wooden heart?
joseph: no….a golden heart
Joseph: nope a warm & fuzzy heart mod72 has!!!
asdfghjkl:i agree now mod 99 and 25……………..im just kidding mods ur all great!!!!! 😛
mod42: is my fave tonight!!!!! please keep the updates going!!!! i will be at shachris at 6:15am, is can assure you!!!
Since all we’re seeing posted is random spam these days…..
____________________________________________________________
Why do banks charge a fee on ‘insufficient funds’ when they already know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars; but have to check when you say the paint is still wet?
Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an ‘S’ in the word ‘lisp’?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? (specially for GMAB)
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, ‘It’s all right?’ Well, it isn’t all right, so why don’t we say, ‘That really hurt, why don’t you watch where you’re going?’
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that’s falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends — if they’re okay, then it’s you.
squeak: HAHA those are hilarious thanx u gave me a really good laugh
THE MATRRESS PROFESSIONALS DOING IT RIGHT…SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPYYSSSSS FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFEEE!!!!!!!
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