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June 22, 2009 3:02 am at 3:02 am #923470I can only tryMember
an open book-
Excellent!
“sycophant” – A+
June 22, 2009 3:19 am at 3:19 am #923471kapustaParticipantICOT, possibly, gotta think. In the meantime you’re doing an awesome job along with AOB.
AOB, EXCELLENT!
keep em coming!
June 22, 2009 3:51 am at 3:51 am #923472yossi z.Membericot: message
wow! you are starting to sound like my brother but wow i would have been on this thread long ago had i known how hilarious this would be!! RWLOTF (and trying to stay in(/on?) my chair)
June 22, 2009 3:56 am at 3:56 am #923473anonymisssParticipantI can’t believe I’ve been missin out on this thread! You guys are a riot!!!
~a~
June 22, 2009 1:25 pm at 1:25 pm #923474mepalMemberFery Drafficy Road
a chassidishe guy stuck in traffic on the FDR.
June 22, 2009 1:55 pm at 1:55 pm #923475noitallmrParticipantSorry people forgive the major ignorance but is the expression “your a riot!” common in the U.S? Is it the English equivalent of “your a scream!”????
June 22, 2009 2:14 pm at 2:14 pm #923476anonymisssParticipantmepal, reminds me of one summer, upstate, my brother had a serious allergic reaction and went into anaphylactic shock. One of the Hatzalah guys who came was this chassidish guy. My little 10 yr old brother is sitting there with an oxygen mask on his face and he says to my brother, “tell me da trut, I don’t bite. Do you feel tight in your choke?” (You really have to hear it with the accent, he still imitates it!)
~a~
June 22, 2009 2:24 pm at 2:24 pm #923477mepalMemberlol anonymiss! I just hear the guy saying that!
mr. noitall, not sure what “your a scream!” means, but first of all, its you’RE and ‘you’re a riot’ is (ruffly speaking) an expression of someone being really funny.
June 22, 2009 5:26 pm at 5:26 pm #923478anonymisssParticipantnoitall and mepal, I know people here who say you’re a scream
~a~
June 22, 2009 7:40 pm at 7:40 pm #923479areivimzehlazehParticipantICOT- where’s today’s list? I’m lovin it!
June 22, 2009 9:40 pm at 9:40 pm #923480noitallmrParticipantanonymisss- are there really people here that call me a scream? 😉
June 22, 2009 11:11 pm at 11:11 pm #923481an open bookParticipantespionage
when charged atoms with a sixth sense go into retirement
swedish
could use some more sugar
cubicle
one of those homemade icepops made in an ice tray
June 22, 2009 11:29 pm at 11:29 pm #923482I can only tryMemberyossi z.-
Jump right in.
anonymisss-
Funny. B”H he’s OK and you got to laugh about it.
mepal-
Fery good!
areivimzehlazeh-
Coming up!
metrognome
A short rider on the Paris subway.
monocole
An individual portion of grated kapusta.
influenceza
How an Italian mobster avoids prison.
delimit
Exceed this and you get deticket.
shampain
The stomachache a schoolchild develops on the morning of a test.
excessorize
Overspending on matching chotchkes.
refraction
What occurs if one resumes jogging before allowing shin splints to heal properly.
synthesizer
pairodice
Gamblers idea of Gan Eiden.
Jewdiciary
A Bais Din.
atonal
What a broken phone is.
freequints
trunkate
How the alligator performed rhinoplasty on the elephant.
kleennecks
What a mother checks for to ensure that her kids really showered.
bumpkin
Whacking a relative with a pumpkin.
bubkiss
June 23, 2009 12:43 am at 12:43 am #923483kapustaParticipantmonocole
An individual portion of grated kapusta.
ouch. that hurts! watch it!
jk, I had a not-so-good day. (REALLY dont wanna get into it.) but, ICOT, I checked out this thread and got a few smiles and an almost-laugh. thanx
AOB, see the post to ICOT. Thanx to you too.
June 23, 2009 1:04 am at 1:04 am #923484an open bookParticipantkapusta: 🙂
hope you’re doing better now
icot: yours are great 🙂
June 23, 2009 3:14 am at 3:14 am #923486JaxMemberall amazing ones today! you guys are a panic!
June 23, 2009 3:37 am at 3:37 am #923487I can only tryMemberkapusta-
Would you have preferred shredded? 🙂
To quote Rav Scheinberg shlita, “keep smiling, and keep going.”
an open book-
Thank you, same to you.
It took me a minute to get “espionage” – it’s been a long time since HS science for me (plus the only elements on our periodic table were earth, water, wind and fire).
June 23, 2009 6:26 pm at 6:26 pm #923488mepalMemberKapusta, what happened to you?! You can’t just drop us cold turkey cuz you had a hard day! If anything, all the more so, you should chill here!
Looking forward to seeing more of you around….
June 24, 2009 1:15 am at 1:15 am #923489I can only tryMemberruebarb
Regretting a sharp remark.
scabbard
What Shakespeare was called after crossing a picket line.
predisposed
Recycled from trash.
polka
truckyoulent
What your friend who borrowed your pickup thanks you for.
candiddate
A shidduch lacking tact.
circumscribe
A mohel who is also a sofer.
Shahgrin
What Pahlavi would be doing nowadays if he could see the unrest in Iran.
climbitologist
A mountaineer.
submission
submissive
pigloo
An arctic porcine abode.
eskimoo
Yep, cows also live there.
aquafur
The unpleasant scent of wet dog.
Adaquit
June 24, 2009 2:52 am at 2:52 am #923490an open bookParticipantpolka
ha i love that 😉
& it makes me think of aussie…
June 24, 2009 4:02 pm at 4:02 pm #923491jewishfeminist02MemberThis is not mine, I found it in my A Word a Day e-mail newsletter:
Some method actors try to look sad, but poor Mel Gibson tells the story that when he played Hamlet, he brought a sheepdog with him on set, so people would say there goes Mel and Collie.
(The word of the day was melancholic.)
June 24, 2009 4:08 pm at 4:08 pm #923492mepalMemberlol JF2!
June 24, 2009 7:00 pm at 7:00 pm #923493areivimzehlazehParticipantICOT- how do you come up with these??
June 24, 2009 10:50 pm at 10:50 pm #923494I can only tryMemberareivimzehlazeh-
2) Ouija board.
3) I have Gary Larson locked up in my basement.
b) Some just pop into my head (nature abhors a vacuum), such as triscuitdeckaphobia (I googled it and found several other people had come up with the word, and with similar definitions).
c) Look for words that sound like a combination of two or more words, then try to come up with a humorous definition that ties them together.
Thank you for the interest / encouragement.
farshul
Extra schar halicha for attending Shabbos davening.
banano
A really, really small yellow fruit (NOT made by Apple).
sighcologist
‘arbour
‘courseIcan
What the Little Engine that Could replied the next time it was asked if it could cross a mountain.
plumage
Slivovitz.
contrail
What a bloodhound follows.
syndication
semantics
The schtick that post-high-school girls enjoy.
buillionaire
magnatetism
The attractive force that draws people to buillionaires.
ferrule
A law evenly applied to all (as opposed to an unferrule).
dullcet
When your Shabbos silverware needs polishing.
dyeit
Coloring your clothes a darker shade in order to look slimmer.
June 24, 2009 11:58 pm at 11:58 pm #923495JaxMemberI can only try: amazing ones today! ha!
June 25, 2009 1:33 am at 1:33 am #923496I can only tryMemberJax-
Thank you.
Have a great summer;
-either-
a) learning to catch mice in the CatSkills
-or-
b) Learning Indian wisdom from the PocaKnows
June 25, 2009 3:38 am at 3:38 am #923497JaxMemberI can only try: hilarious! thanks so much! enjoy your summer as well!
June 25, 2009 3:10 pm at 3:10 pm #923498A600KiloBearParticipantBS”D
Everclear (proper noun):
An American trademark for pure ethyl alcohol, distilled from grain and intended for consumption at least when diluted.
An oxymoron, as one who drinks it cannot be ever clear.
June 25, 2009 6:29 pm at 6:29 pm #923499areivimzehlazehParticipantcontrail
What a bloodhound follows.
I really like that one 🙂
June 30, 2009 5:55 pm at 5:55 pm #923500jewishfeminist02Memberbadinage: referring to someone denied a privilege because he/she is too young/old.
(It really means light, playful talk or banter.)
July 2, 2009 1:45 am at 1:45 am #923501I can only tryMemberparsnip
Falsely slicing strokes off your golf score to make par.
desimate
Lucy.
lucifur
The mink Desi got her.
crysis
aquamarine
A Navy S.E.A.L.
casaroll
A Spanish RV
elephants
What you get at an Israeli picnic.
misssteak
What would occur if you erroneously arrive late at a barbecue.
schnauzerfreude
What you feel when you lose a raffle drawing, and it turns out the grand prize is a funny-looking dog.
sheiker
The offspring of a Saudi and a Quaker.
pickasow
An artist deciding which mother pig to paint.
regiscide
carppaydiem
A substitute teacher, griping about his salary.
July 2, 2009 3:20 am at 3:20 am #923502kapustaParticipantICOT, awesome, as usual! Some of the younger folks may not get some of them…
I hereby crown you king of this thread too!
July 2, 2009 12:14 pm at 12:14 pm #923504I can only tryMemberkapusta-
Thank you, but court jester is more like it.
(we aim to please)
July 2, 2009 7:14 pm at 7:14 pm #923505areivimzehlazehParticipantICOT- those were out of this world! I actually laughed out loud… really good ones 🙂
July 3, 2009 12:14 pm at 12:14 pm #923506I can only tryMemberareivimzehlazeh-
Thank you.
I consider a chuckle, smile or groan a mark of success 🙂
baygull
An aquatic bird, native to San Francisco. Diet includes salmon (smoked).
cucumberbund
A greenish tuxedo accessory.
fauxcabulary
This list.
fictionary
Where you can look up fauxcabulary words.
Iknockyouaus
Threat uttered by innocent looking German mugger.
hobokin
Relative of a dumpy New Jersey city resident.
fixedsure
An electricians reassurance regarding a repair job.
trombonenick
The bratty kid who plays his musical instrument while you are trying to sleep.
privatear
The less-successful relative of a private eye. May have to resort to crime to pay bills.
buckanear
blunderbus
Accidentally taking the B6 instead of the B11.
grapeshot
Shabbattone
Zemiros.
Gut Shabbos.
July 3, 2009 2:45 pm at 2:45 pm #923507mepalMemberICOT, they’re GREAT! Keep them coming!
July 6, 2009 4:50 pm at 4:50 pm #923508jewishfeminist02MemberIn honor of July 4th weekend:
rampart
Custom-designed paintings for the wheelchair-bound.
July 6, 2009 8:21 pm at 8:21 pm #923509mepalMemberADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.
CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.
CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.
SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.
WRINKLES:
Something other people have. I have character lines
July 7, 2009 12:03 am at 12:03 am #923510I can only tryMemberjewishfeminist02-
Welcome to the punny farm.
mepal-
Uh-oh – I’m afraid you’ve raised the bar for this thread.
July 7, 2009 3:53 pm at 3:53 pm #923511DeliberatelyEsotericMember.
mepal, now that we’ve got icot producing original fauxcabulary regularly, you have to admit when you get your entire list off an email that’s been circulating for years… 🙂 but yeah, that was a great bunch of definitions. thanks for posting!
July 7, 2009 4:06 pm at 4:06 pm #923512mepalMemberI was debating wether to put it here or in the ‘Good forwards’ thread. I thought it fit well here. Nowhere does it state that it must be original.
July 8, 2009 1:01 am at 1:01 am #923513I can only tryMemberToday’s defunitions:
rapsscallions
What an onion-hater does when discussing salad greens.
Avarishus
Ava, deciding she is too hungry to take the time to make a brocha before eating.
crocosmile
A big, fake, toothy smile. (similar to crocotears).
discobobulate
To confuse someone with flashing, blinking colored lights.
supersillyus
We who post these words.
hospice
Where sick smowmen go.
payperboy
yammer
extoll
The Staten Island side of the Verrazano bridge.
Muskietears
coughee
Keyboard
Rye Brook
transitTory
Palintologist
July 8, 2009 1:12 am at 1:12 am #923514kapustaParticipantICOT, some of those were awesome!!! I think as the CR queen, I get the first autographed book. 😉
July 8, 2009 2:09 am at 2:09 am #923515I can only tryMemberkapusta-
Thank you.
I don’t know about a first book, but how about this: B”N no one else gets a book before you.
July 8, 2009 3:44 pm at 3:44 pm #923516mepalMemberICOT, EXCELLENT! I love the yammer one! Keep them coming!!
July 9, 2009 1:04 pm at 1:04 pm #923517jewishfeminist02Memberfervid
A documentary about animal coats.
July 9, 2009 2:24 pm at 2:24 pm #923518squeakParticipantmorbid
A desperate plea by a foreign auctioneer.
July 14, 2009 2:58 pm at 2:58 pm #923519jewishfeminist02MemberIneffable
Located in the town of Effable, halfway between Eeeable and Geeable.
Gauche
A synonym for one’s possessions, often invoked as a surprised exclamation in place of “goodness” or “stars”.
July 15, 2009 1:20 pm at 1:20 pm #923520jewishfeminist02MemberBestow
The most impressive scream of pain.
July 15, 2009 10:45 pm at 10:45 pm #923521 -
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