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Isnt it wonderful to arrive
At limerick page number 5
I write from my fone
About reaching this milestone
This thread is now truly alive
And as these verses i fix
I tell you i’m getting great kicks
So come on boys and girls
I wanna watch as your pen twirls
Till we hit upon limerick page six!
there is a chiyuv called chayavinishlivisumay
it is something that the rabbis say
but do it with bottle of wine
have seven eight or nine
cuz wine is the right way
some do it with beer
and others i fear
do it with hard stuff
cuz they think they are tough
but thats not what the rabbis say
Blinky (Blinquie): “shticky- love yours!!”
FOR GOODNESS SAKE; WHICH ONE???????????????????
PS My limerick on the Hasc concert was genuine questions. I really want feedback on the concert. Anyone help me out?
i dont know what a limerick is
but i see it involves a rhyming biz
so ill leave it to you
maybe this is haiku?
thanks blinky
youre not at all stinky
Mod 80- if you don’t follow rules of the limerick,
We’ll close this thread real quick
You’ve got to follow correctly each line
Then you’ll do just fine
& yours will be the CR’s pick!
i dont know the rules
rules are for fools
i rhyme what i want
my brilliance to flaunt
if this isnt a limerick
then what is ik?
Mod c’mon you’re much smarter than that,
Don’t you be the world’s brat,
1
1
2
2
1
The lines should be
Just follow my lines & you’ll see
Now try it & I’ll be ready to tip my hat!!
Oh the tears that flowed from my eyes
of obamas political lies
his dark skin does glow
though admittedy so
from the fibs he fabricates-LIES!
Over 300 limericks posted
its amazing how many are roasted
weird posts indeed
where will they lead
they have left me largely toasted
MOd 80 and smartcookie did feud
over limericks’ linguistics-so crude
why fight like mere goyim
fight over kibbutzim
just make sure its not misconstrued
Limericks are 5 lined patterned rhyme
the first two rhyme and are 8 or 9
syllables are 5 or 6
for the 3rd & 4th mix
then the last line with the first 2 do rhyme
Mod 80 is a bit of a fopper
When he posts in here limericks that flop-er
We know you are bright
So our pages dont blight
when you are AT LEAST AS GOOD AS POPPA
It may come as a suprise to you
That poppa and mod 80 have the same IQ
So I’ll tell you a secret
And I hope you can keep it
For they are but one person, not two!
You may say that I’m a rhymer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will be as one
Shticky- your last one was amazing! You really have talent!
Fltbush Dude- I’m offended by your post. Nobody was fighting!!!
blinky i know the rules but i didnt have a rhyme for the last line
Mod 80 ur posts are not so good
but i will tell u what i should
its not right that u have two names
cuz the cr is not meant for playing games
so if u have two everybody cud
Mod 80…a song from the 80s,right?
Limericks are hard on the head,
that’s why there’s a poetry thread.
It’s hard to rhyme twice,
impossible thrice!
That’s why I’ll stay there instead.
My car is still by the mechanic,
and now I am in a real panic.
Oh what should I do,
my kids have the flu,
but I can’t get to Dr. Shanek!
There once once a chossid from Willy,
who went to go learn in Philly.
but let’s not confuse
the two types of Jews
a chassidishe litvak is silly!
Chayav, your issue is weighty.
Are you a man or a lady?
So go see a shrink,
or at least have a drink,
so that you won’t be so far-dreit-y!
In the CR there’s screamin’ and yellin’;
Who’s who? Nobody’s tellin’.
We know Shticky Guy,
is not Bed-Stuy,
and that Joseph is practically a felon!
daas yaochid it seems u are talking alone
do u have conversations with noone else on the phone
u left five comments in a row
so let someone else have a go
nah forget it ill just leave u alone
On Shabbos, the cholent we eat,
is a very special treat.
But my tummy’s now pained,
oh the calories I gained,
from barley, potatoes and meat.
I now must spend my hard earned gelt,
because I am no longer svelte.
I’ll go in my Chevy,
cause now I’m so heavy,
that I need a new “cholent belt”.
Shabbos, the holiest of days,
a good Yid learns, and he prays.
To feed the “neshomo y’seiro”
is not an aveiro,
but the “guf y’seiro”, it stays.
My asthma causes my wheezing,
my cold has me coughing and sneezing.
I’ve so many ills,
I’ll pop a few pills,
don’t worry, I am just teasing.
Guf Yiseira!Cute!
Daas Yochid- don’t kid yourself please
Its not the Cholent that makes us sneeze
The cholent has beans which is protien
& some meat thats quite lean
It’s the Challah that makes us gain weight in a breeze.
chayav, I just saw your post,
you’re a better poet than most.
I’m talking to no one,
I’m just having some fun;
this thread is a limerick host.
Shitcky guy if I’m not mistaken
You asked that this thread should not be forsaken
So I wrote this one for you
I hope it will do
& I’ll try some more limericks to make’n.
Guf Yiseira!Cute!
It is my limerick, but that’s not my line (I don’t remember where I heard it).
A mega limericker has suddenely appeared
Who writes fantastic limericks 5-tiered
Daas yochid is his name
And he’s gr8 at this game
Why he’s just come along recently is wierd!
Yes not long ago this thread was dying
Go check and you’ll see I’m not lying
There were gaps of a week
So your help I did seek
And right now its just absolutely FLYING!
Thus far from what I have found,
the best at rhyming a sound,
is someone who’s shticky,
and although I’m picky,
I think he’s the best poet around!
Da’as yochid’s efforts I dont want to miss,
But I must draw the line at this,
Its no good for my ga’aiveh,
You’ll give me a ta’aiveh,
For much more than a shmini she’bishminis.
Saying I’m the best POET is the wrong thing said,
When I limericked amongst Poems bitten was my head,
Cos limericks are the best,
Way ahead of the rest,
Thats why I was told post only in THIS thread.
I love that this post received so many responses.
Bye Bye Burglar
by Antelope110
A burglar through my door once burst
Ready to burgle his worst
But I must confess
That he found such a mess
He thought someone had gotten in first.
shticky: to reduce the size of your head, shtick to the correct beat for limericks!
Daas Yochid, you’ve turned an Irish art into a Jewish vehicle for truth through fun.
I’m sorry if I told the truth,
it’s something I’ve done since my youth.
But please don’t be haughty,
’cause that’s very naughty,
and some would say that it’s uncouth.
If ga’ava’s not your favorite flavor,
I was just returning the favor;
You spoke well of me,
undeservedly,
and kovod I also do savor.
antelope110,
Thanks for the compliment, but the credit is due Blinky. In other words:
Thank you for your words so nice,
and for adding to this thread some spice.
But Blinky is earning
the credit for turning
a limerick into a Jewish device.
Didn’t write a rhyme in a while
It really became my new writing style
I think it’s a ball
Come one come all
And help the Limerick thread pile!
It’s always the same few ladies and gentlemen
Who write limericks again and again
We want all of you to join in
Come on and BEGIN
What are you waiting for? Pick up your pen!
I started to read this thread
And then began my head
Reading and flying
Thinking and rhyming
All while laying in bed!
It is now two in the morn
My head is all in a swarm
For limericks I try
From nine to five
And if I can help it, some more
It seems that I have got stuck
Here all in a muck
Reading and writing
Timing and rhyming
Oh no! It is time to get up!
How was that?
Yossi, it was a nice try,
but your poems just did not fly.
Not bad the timing,
but awful the rhyming,
So I will let you know the rules,
(I went to four limerick schools).
These rules you must follow,
so here are some important tools.
it must fit into certain specs,
Lines 1,2, with 5
and 3 with 4 jive,
and there is not much room to flex.
The first and the second line,
may not have more sounds than 9.
Lines 3 and 4
cannot have more
than five, for the limerick to shine.
With one more rule I will proceed,
the final line may not exceed,
syllables seven,
for limerick heaven,
and now you know how to succeed!
Your effort, I really commend;
my words, I hope, do not offend.
Ohhhh now it makes sense (I was having trouble figuring out how it was supposed to work). Thanks a lot daas
😀 yo$$i 😀
Mazal tov to my cousin
She now has a chosson
The wedding’s today
So on my way
To B-more I shall be goin’
(I know, still not the greatest but I stayed within the guidelines-one thing at a time) but still true-I am heading to baltimore today for my cousin’s chasuna
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