Anxiety disorders are on the rise. The National Institute of Mental Health reports that approximately one-third of U.S. adults will experience an anxiety disorder at some point in their lives. It is the most common mental health concern. While the exact cause of this increase is not conclusive, many researchers believe it’s connected to the rise in social media and technology use, increased social comparisons, weakened meaningful relationships, and poor sleep patterns.
Research on anxiety within the frum community is limited, but it’s clear that we’re not immune to these trends. Let’s differentiate between common anxiety and anxiety disorders — and explore how even those with strong emunah can be affected.
Anxiety is a normal and temporary emotion, triggered by a perceived threat or stressor. It’s the “smoke alarm” that Hashem created to protect us from danger. When our brain senses danger, it activates the sympathetic nervous system — our “fight or flight” response. In short-term or situational cases, this can actually help us cope with the immediate situation. However, anxiety becomes a disorder when it is excessive, persistent, and significantly interferes with daily functioning. The key differences between common anxiety and an anxiety disorder are frequency, duration, intensity, and the level of impairment it causes.
Understanding why someone develops an anxiety disorder isn’t simple. Researchers estimate that genetics account for 30% to 60% of the risk. Personality traits, childhood experiences, and environmental stressors also play major roles.
Anxiety disorders include:
- Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): Persistent, excessive worry across many aspects of daily life.
- Panic Disorder: Recurrent panic attacks — sudden episodes of intense fear, often with physical symptoms like a racing heart or shortness of breath.
- Social Anxiety Disorder: An intense fear of social situations and potential judgment.
- Specific Phobias: Irrational fears of particular objects or situations, leading to avoidance.
- Separation Anxiety Disorder: Excessive distress over being separated from attachment figures (common in children, but also seen in adults).
- Agoraphobia: Fear of situations where escape might be difficult or help unavailable, often linked to panic disorder.
- Selective Mutism: The inability to speak in certain social situations despite being able to speak in others.
- Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD): Intrusive thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety.
The thing about anxiety disorders is that they’re not rational. It’s like a faulty smoke alarm that goes off every time you make potato kugel. Even though you know there’s no fire, the alarm is still blaring — unpleasant and distressing, enough to make you want to stop cooking altogether.
That’s why giving yourself or someone else an emunah pep talk often isn’t enough. You already believe there’s no danger — but your body hasn’t gotten the memo. The anxiety “alarm” is still going off. For the body to truly learn that it’s safe, it requires repeated exposure and the building of tolerance to discomfort. Over time, when you face that discomfort without escaping, your nervous system learns that it isn’t a threat. The alarm stops blaring.
Belief is powerful — but when it comes to anxiety disorders, belief alone is often not enough. The body, shaped by a complex mix of biological, psychological, and social factors, must experience safety first-hand in order to heal.
Chayi Hanfling is a licensed clinical social worker who is experienced and passionate in helping individuals, families, and couples. She specializes in couples counseling, EFT, women’s health, anxiety management, OCD, trauma, and other mental health challenges.
She can be reached at www.chaicounseling.org or [email protected]
(YWN World Headquarters – NYC)
Join the official YWN WhatsApp status
5 Responses
Anxiety disorder is often the cause of alcohol abuse. It is not for nothing that liquor has been called “liquid courage”.
Thank you for posting this.
I believe that l was born with GAD….
My mother, a new, nervous driver, was in an accident, and was exposed to x-rays before she knew she was pregnant with me. For reasons unclear to me, no pregnancy test was administered before the X-rays. (This was over 50 years ago). The doctor attributed her symptoms to anxiety from the accident.
She was extremely stressed throughout the pregnancy. Based on other early childhood issues that l had, (allergy and pulmonary), it is also possible that l was in fact born in the 8th month. I guess I’ll never know.
I had phobias, fears, eating issues, difficulty making friends and many other problems growing up. The responses to my challenges, due to a lack of knowledge, were neglectful at best, abusive at worst. It took many years of therapy, a broken marriage, medication, and family mistakes before l got the help l needed. Lots of exhaustive and expensive therapy.
Family is not always right. Not always do they allow you to recover and alter the status quo. Your “condition” is part of their dysfunctional family dynamic. Changing that upsets the apple cart!
They will ostracize you, and claim you are the problem.
Loneliness is painful.
Get the help anyway – you’ll be a happier, more effective person!
Find kindred spirits. They are everywhere.
Develop your inner personality through creative hobbies.
Sing.
Draw.
Build things.
Play music.
Write.
Craft.
You don’t have to be a professional.
Do it for yourself.
Help Others.
Keep davening and talking to Hashem – in your heart and in your siddur. He will ALWAYS hear you. He is listening. And if you are paying attention, you will begin to see His hand in your life.
All the time.
This is an excellent article. As a high school teacher, discussions about anxiety come up a lot but we are careful not to provide any sort of therapy. I saved this article to show my students if the need arises. Thank you!
Thank you for posting this.
I believe that l was born with GAD….
My mother, a new, nervous driver, was in an accident, and was exposed to x-rays before she knew she was pregnant with me. For reasons unclear to me, no pregnancy test was administered before the X-rays. (This was over 50 years ago). The doctor attributed her symptoms to anxiety from the accident.
She was extremely stressed throughout the pregnancy. Based on other early childhood issues that l had, (allergy and pulmonary), it is also possible that l was in fact born in the 8th month. I guess I’ll never know.
I had phobias, fears, eating issues, difficulty making friends and many other problems growing up. The responses to my challenges, due to a lack of knowledge, were neglectful at best, abusive at worst. It took many years of therapy, a broken marriage, medication, and family mistakes before l got the help l needed. Lots of exhaustive and expensive therapy.
Family is not always right. Not always do they allow you to recover and alter the status quo. Your “condition” is part of their dysfunctional family dynamic. Changing that upsets the apple cart!
They will ostracize you, and claim you are the problem.
Loneliness is painful.
Get the help anyway – you’ll be a happier, more effective person!
Find kindred spirits. They are everywhere.
Develop your inner personality through creative hobbies.
Sing.
Draw.
Play music.
Build Stuff.
Write.
You don’t have to be a professional.
Do it for yourself.
Help Others.
Keep davening and talking to Hashem – in your heart and in your siddur. He will ALWAYS hear you. He is listening. And if you are paying attention, you will begin to see His hand in your life. All the time.
Apologies for duplicate post