Funny Shidduch Stories

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Viewing 50 posts - 901 through 950 (of 1,423 total)
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  • #1227152
    neatfreak
    Member

    A friend of mine’s wristlet fell under her chair by the hotel. she didnt realize until they had pulled up in front of her house and she was getting ready to leave the car. and then the boy went back to the hotel (luckily its a 20 min drive) and picked it up for her.

    And the best part… she did it agian not even a month later with another boy!! but the second time she realized just after they had left the hotel.

    she didnt marry either, but b”h she is now married.

    #1227153
    Jax
    Member

    areivim: brilliant there!

    neatfreak: her what?!

    #1227154
    mepal
    Member

    Jax, wristlet is a kind of purse/pocket book. If you have any sissy’s ask them. They’ll know.

    #1227155
    modifed
    Member

    I went out on a date and we were taking a nice walk and all of the sudden a bird made on me!?!!? bH it was only on my jacket and not like on my hair…but i thought that a bird making on u was supposed to be good luck but i didnt end up marrying that guy!?!!!

    #1227156
    Joseph
    Participant

    You should have.

    #1227157
    sunflower
    Member

    ….,that is totallt gross! and why in the world would you think that its a good luck sign?

    #1227158
    Jax
    Member

    mepal: thanks for the explanation there! now i get it! 😉

    …..: cool SN! welcome to the CR!

    p.s. i so should have made my SN as !!!! hee hee! 72 aint’t here!

    #1227159
    yeshivahman
    Member

    It was good luck that you didn’t marry him!

    #1227160
    mepal
    Member

    Jax, anytime 😉

    ….omg, now THAT’S embarrassing!

    #1227161
    Dr. Pepper
    Participant

    My date and I had the privilege of being with a large group of British Tourists in an elevator (henceforth referred to as a lift) speeding to the top of the Empire State Building.

    Right after we started ascending the “L” on the top changed to a 10.

    “I wonder what the 10 is there for?” one of them said out loud.

    The guide answered, “Oh, that must be how many Pounds we each paid for our tickets!”

    Tons of laughter…

    Then the number changed to 20

    “Now it says 20, I wonder what 20 is for?”

    “20, that must be how many people are in the lift!”

    Tons of laughter…

    30-

    “Look, now we’re traveling at 30 meters per second!”

    Tons of laughter…

    40-

    “These light bulbs must be 40 watts!”

    Even more laughter…

    I then looked at my date who was doubled over in pain.

    “Are you OK?” I asked.

    “NO!”, she whispered to me while rolling her eyes, “I can’t take British Humor”.

    #1227163
    Jax
    Member

    Dr. Pepper: another winner story from the ”Dr. Peppers Dating Chronicles”!

    #1227164
    Dr. Pepper
    Participant

    Probably not a true story but…

    The shadchan tells the guy wonderful things about the girl and oh, by the way she’s heavily medicated.

    “What’s she on?” the guy wants to know.

    “They never told me”, replied the shadchan. “Here’s an idea, when you go to pick her up ask to use the restroom and check the medicine cabinet.”

    So he goes to pick her up, asks to use the bathroom and when he opens the door to the cabinet a few hundred marbles came crashing out.

    He didn’t end up taking her out. (Last time I heard this story, about 7 years ago, he was still in the bathroom.)

    #1227165
    mepal
    Member

    Oh. My. Gosh. True or not, that is hysterical!!

    #1227166
    Jax
    Member

    Pepper does it again! outstanding!

    #1227167
    NY Mom
    Member

    OK, I just heard this from someone who heard it from the girl herself!

    So the girl was cute, but on the <ahem> heavy side, and the guy was on the blunt side.

    Well, within the first few minutes of their 1st meeting, the guy says, “So…you planning on losing some weight?” The girl was kind of shocked and the meeting ended, let us say, prematurely.

    So his parents kind of worked him over and convinced him that there was more than meets the eye with this girl. Her Rabbi persuaded her that (bluntness aside) she should give him another chance…

    They ended up getting married!

    #1227168
    Joseph
    Participant

    Mazal Tov!!

    How long are you married now?

    JK

    #1227169
    mepal
    Member

    OMG! I’m impressed she agreed to go out again.

    #1227170
    NY Mom
    Member

    I don’t think I could have gotten over that either, but…Hashem is the true Shadchan!

    Joseph: How I met my husband was totally different and filled with hashgocho protis – don’t think I want to share that one yet.

    #1227171
    mybat
    Member

    I don’t think this is really funny. But when I went out with my husband for like the 4th time we went for a coffee somewhere and the waiter actually dropped the whole tray of food and drinks on top of me. Well my husband was very impressed that I kept my cool.

    #1227172
    NY Mom
    Member

    mybat: Sounds like something you will eventually laugh about, but at the time it was completely embarrassing/upsetting/aggravating/unpleasant!

    #1227173
    mybat
    Member

    Another date with a different guy before my hubby. I was wearing heals and we were walking quickly to reach someone we were supposed to meet. The floor was like a shiny slippery floor. Well I tripped and fell down. That was embarrassing and I even went out with the guy a few more times after that. I didn’t marry him.

    #1227174
    bein_hasdorim
    Participant

    This Guy I know went on a date in NYC & they were crossing by a crosswalk

    when the guy takes a step into the street & a car is speeding right at him.

    He doesn’t notice, but the girl does & pulls him back by his jacket, saving

    him from being hit. He was totally embarrassed, freaks out, doesn’t act himself

    the rest of the evening, & refuses to go out again.

    #1227175
    outoftowner
    Member

    stupid guy…

    #1227176
    mepal
    Member

    B_H, he shoulda’ thanked the girl for saving his life at least.

    #1227177
    FunnyBunny
    Member

    b_h, I’ve heard the same story the other way around- that the guy pulled the girl out of the street.

    #1227178
    Dr. Pepper
    Participant

    bein_hasdorim

    I also heard the story the other way around. The girl didn’t realise it was a one way street and looked the wrong way and started to cross. He grabbed her to safety.

    I was his chavrusa at the time. He told me the story the day after it happened and they ended up getting married.

    #1227179
    Joseph
    Participant

    Sounds like it “happened” quite often. Were they really all “accidents”?

    #1227180
    areivimzehlazeh
    Participant

    ah- back to the accidental accident reported on Avenue J involving desparate shidduch attempters… ;);)

    #1227181
    bein_hasdorim
    Participant

    Dr. Pepper” I’m sure it happened more than once,

    This story, however, is not one I heard “Ish mipi Ish”

    I know the guy, as well as the girl.

    P.S.It happened more than 8 years ago, & they’re both still single.

    #1227182
    toomuch00
    Member

    These stories are all hysterical, keep em up…

    #1227183
    Joseph
    Participant

    bein: Perhaps another save is in order.

    #1227184
    squeak
    Participant

    areivimzehlazeh

    Member

    ah- back to the accidental accident reported on Avenue J involving desparate shidduch attempters… ;);)

    And just in case I’m the only one who realized this, areivim is reminding us that we already discussed this strategy and agreed that it was a good one, right here. I’m still cracking up imagining this happening.

    #1227186
    bein_hasdorim
    Participant

    Mod 26 thanks for that.

    Joseph: I know, 🙂 but she wouldn’t have it.

    His reaction left a bad impression.

    #1227187
    haifagirl
    Participant

    I haven’t been out on too many dates because I’m way too picky. But luckily I have friends . . .

    This happened a long time ago. Both my friend and her date are from the same out-of-town town. This was in the days before there were sensors in the highways to tell the traffic reporters where the traffic jams are. There was a traffic reporter office on the observation floor of a tall building. Her date had taken her to that building and arranged for a “tour” of the traffic reporter office.

    Before it was time to meet with the reporter they were looking out one of the windows. He said, “I wonder what would happen if you just kept walking straight.” She replied that you would end up in the next state.

    He asked what you happen if you kept going and she named the state after that.

    He asked what you happen if you kept going and she said, “Eventually you’ll end up back here because the world is round.” She said he looked at her like he had no clue what she was talking about.

    Then it was time to meet the reporter. He explained all the various things in the office and told them about how they have certain landmarks at which they aim the telescope. “For example, when the telescope is here you can see the [famous landmark in that city.]” Guy then grabbed the telescope, turned it so he could look through it and said, “Where is it? I don’t see it.”

    That was their first and last date.

    #1227188
    Dr. Pepper
    Participant

    I got free tickets to the New York Aquarium and asked a neighbor who babysits for us if she wanted to join us. She was a couple of years away from dating but was nervous about it anyway and was asking us tons of questions the whole trip.

    (What should I do if the guy proposes and I like him but I’m not ready to commit yet? I can’t say yes and if I say no he might want to end it!…)

    When we were near the shark exhibit it started raining really hard so we waited under the hangover by the exhibit.

    That’s when we saw them- Zalman and Zelda (sorry we never got their real names) on a date- totally oblivious to their surroundings.

    “Here’s a pop quiz for you” I said to the babysitter, “Give me three ways I can tell that they are on their first date?”.

    She couldn’t name any of them so I gave her the answers.

    1. He is wearing a jacket, tie and hat on a hot summer day in August at the aquarium.

    2. He’s holding an umbrella, large enough for both of them, totally over her while he is getting drenched.

    3. He is showing off his encyclopedic knowledge on salamanders while she is soaking up every word that he is saying.

    “Well actually”, my wife added, “Those are the three ways I can tell that they are on their last date!”

    #1227189
    haifagirl
    Participant

    I know a young woman who has no sense of direction and can’t read a map. She went out on a first date with a young man who is similarly afflicted.

    He picked her up and then spent the next 2 hours lost on his way to the restaurant.

    After the date, when he told his friends what had happened they asked what her reaction was. He told them she didn’t complain. She didn’t seem to mind at all.

    They told him if she really didn’t mind being lost for 2 hours he should marry her. He did.

    #1227190
    mepal
    Member

    ROTFL, Dr. Pepper and Haifagirl! Great ones!!

    #1227191
    Jax
    Member

    this thread is always good for an awesome laugh! keep em coming folks!

    #1227192
    bein_hasdorim
    Participant

    haifagirl: wow! she didn’t seem to mind, lucky guy! maybe she thought

    he’s a great catch, as he’s used going in circles, & wouldn’t mind it

    when she did it to him.

    #1227193
    Dr. Pepper
    Participant

    Don’t ask why but I had to go to an expensive restaurant for a particular date. The more expensive the restaurant the less I know what the items on the menu are. At this restaurant I didn’t know what a single thing was.

    The girl looked up from the menu and said, “I can’t decide between two things. How about you?”

    I said, “To me they all sound the same”.

    Then she came up with an idea- “How about I order both items and share them with you?”

    I loved that idea. She actually only took a quarter of each one and left me with the other three quarters. It was such a good date- I socialize soooo much better on a full stomach. (And there were no leftovers for her to doggy bag.)

    #1227194
    FunnyBunny
    Member

    Dr. Pepper, keep ’em coming! This thread is probably 3/4 filled with your hilarious posts!

    #1227195

    pepper, great one.

    #1227196
    mybat
    Member

    Dr pepper should write a book!

    #1227197
    NY Mom
    Member

    OK, this one really happened to my husband – with another girl.

    So my hubby, let’s call him “Yitz”, was dating this girl at a time that the Olympics were being played. He was a frequent customer in some of the establishments that he liked and got friendly with one of the waiters in a certain restaurant – let’s call him “Harry”. Well, Harry had joked with Yitz about how many girls he had brought to the restaurant and if Yitz ever wanted any input from Harry just let him know. “Yes (haha). Thanks, Harry. Maybe next time (haha)”.

    OK…So he brings the next girl to this restaurant and Yitz has forgotten about his little conversation with Harry, but Harry hasn’t forgotten! As Yitz is speaking/eating at the table with the girl, Harry walks by holding something up in a way that only Yitz can see – he is holding a paper that a had a big number 7 on it. At first Yitz doesn’t understand, but he quickly figures it out and starts laughing/coughing/choking! Harry is rating the girl just like at the Olympics! Well, Yitz had to make up some kind of excuse to the girl about what’s so funny, and he couldn’t look at Harry at all for the rest of the date!

    “Yitz” didn’t go back to that restaurant for a while after that one!

    #1227198
    Joseph
    Participant

    A book was already written. Search Amazon for:

    Who on Earth Is Dr. Pepper? – That’s a Good Question

    #1227199
    mybat
    Member

    NY mom that is too much!!!

    Joseph Is there really a book??

    #1227200
    Joseph
    Participant

    mybat: Yes! Search Amazon. Dr. Pepper is quite famous:

    “Who on Earth Is Dr. Pepper? – That’s a Good Question”

    #1227201
    mepal
    Member

    NY Mom: Oh. My. Gosh. That is SO not normal!!

    #1227202
    NY Mom
    Member

    Hi mepal! Glad you liked my husband’s story. He’s got a ton of them! He was at one point, a very eligible bachelor, and took that position very seriously!

    #1227203
    mepal
    Member

    Oh! Keep those stories coming! They’re such good entertainment!!

Viewing 50 posts - 901 through 950 (of 1,423 total)
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