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  • in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183095
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    Well, I can’t say things are going smoothly, but I do hope that we all get to Leil HaSeder in one piece. Especially bc I am desperately hoping for my own geula….

    Wishing everyone a Pesach Kasher v’Sameach!

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183087
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    Oh Shreck!-thanks for your post, and your support. Glad to know that there are other husbands who help their wives…Pesach Sameach!

    Imma613-what a nice chiddush…thank-you! May you and your family also be zoche to see yeshuos, and may we all merit to greet Mashiach and witness the geula b’karov! Pesach Sameach!

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183086
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    zahavasdad-the army has been sending notices for him to come for an interview, but he hasn’t gone. I also originally thought the army would straighten him out, but now I’m afraid of what the pressure could do to him. Regarding the Seder, I will keep your advice in mind. I’m not really expecting too much, and whether he will come to the Seder or not, I don’t really know. Pesach Kasher v’Sameach!

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183082
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    adams-BTW, I do agree with you on one thing. My agony over this is getting in the way….but it is getting in the way of my relationship with my other kids. While I may not cry and show my pain in front of my son who’s OTD, I do, however, cry in front of my other kids. I am working very hard on trying to stop bc it’s non productive and doesn’t allow me to give my other children the proper attention they deserve.

    But maybe I just don’t understand your meaning, how is my agony over his agony preventing him from taking the next step with his life?

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183080
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    Imaofthree-I’m not sure my son has internalized the message that our love for him is unconditional, although we do put in much effort in trying to convey this. I’ve told him many times, “I love you no matter what”. And as much as we don’t force yiddishkeit on him, I’m sure he knows that we believe the right way to be, is frum. After all, that is the life we live and teach to our kids.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183079
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    adams-you say my feelings are getting in the way of helping him. Which feelings, exactly, are you referring to?

    I don’t really agree with your comments, bc the insinuation is that I could actually help him, if I had the right feelings, that it’s all up to me. I actually don’t think I can help him at all, no matter what my feelings are. He is distant, non communicative, angry and almost never home. He has pushed me and my husband out of his life. He hates the Haredim, and I am one of them. I am not forcing yiddishkeit on him, and in fact, never say anything to him about being mechalel Shabbos etc. That, I truly believe, is between him and Hashem. The only time it becomes an issue is if he is openly mechalel Shabbos in my home, around my other children. My agony is in seeing him destroy his life and his potential as a person, not as a religious Jew. Religion is no longer the main issue, and hasn’t been for some time. I have come to terms with the fact that he may never be religious again, but at this point, I’m just hoping he’ll mature and stabilize, and live a healthy, ‘normal’ life.

    in reply to: Jews Resisting the Zionist Draft #940265
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    Israel only ‘needs’ soldiers if there are soldiers. If the secular prefer to be in the army than in yeshiva, then they will be the ‘gun’ to defend the country. But the learning of yeshiva bachurim who are studying in yeshiva provides the ammunition. Without their studying, it would be like shooting with an empty gun. And if everyone were in yeshiva, then we wouldn’t need the gun…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183074
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    zahavasdad/aries2756-I know he doesn’t care what the community thinks. But since he is extremely sensitive to the idea of being embarrassed, I thought that he should be able to see that it goes both ways. But he can’t.

    Imaofthree-thanks…and much nachas to you too!

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183069
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    interjection-but it’s not ‘normal’ in my community, and certainly boys and girls hanging out together is looked upon harshly. I think he knows that.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183067
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    aries2756-My husband didn’t ask, but he probably felt like my husband should ‘mind his business’.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183066
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    Imaofthree-I am so desperate for him to speak with someone, but he will never agree to go. He would rather sink into an abyss of depression and who knows what, than get help for himself. I have to assume that bc of his depression, perhaps he can’t help or mobilize himself, so what should I do? He is not psychotic, so I cannot force any decisions on him. Most of my husband’s friends who see him, always stop to talk to him. They’ve been doing this on their own initiative, bc they really like him and are also pained by what’s happened. They invite him to eat something, take him places. But it happens infrequently, and isn’t really enough to pick him up.

    I just heard a chiddush about Rachel Imenu that I can really relate to. It says, “Rachel mivaka al baneha ki eineinu”. How can it be that the word ‘baneha’ is plural but the word ‘eineinu’ is singular? It says that Rachel is crying for her children bc he is not there. This means that even if I have 10 righteous children, all talmidei chachamim, if I have one child OTD, I cannot be comforted. And it is sooo true. The pain is truly unbearable, and there IS NO COMFORT….except for his return….

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183063
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    Imaofthree-of course.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183061
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    aries2756-while your theory sounds great, and may work some of the time, it wouldn’t have worked this past Shabbos. First of all, I wouldn’t have thought to expect that my son would embarrass me and the entire family in front of our friends and neighbors the way he did. I guess I am still pretty naive in thinking that he does care a tiny bit about us. The degree of selfishness is beyond words, as well as his distorted sense of “who’s embarrassing who”. And I’m still trying to recover from the chutzpah, that he has the nerve to hang out across the street in the middle of the night until morning, with a mixed crowd of loud teens, and then get angry that my husband saw him and ’embarrassed’ him by looking at him! My husband actually woke up in the middle of the night, and went to get some air (it was a hot evening). He was in shock when he saw my son there, and stared in disbelief. Then my son had the nerve to scream at my husband when he got home, that he embarrased him! It didn’t occur to him that his hanging out in front of our building embarrassed us? I’m not sure if I should cry rivers of tears, or just stop crying completely….

    I will, however, try to apply your advice to Pesach.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183059
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    aries2756/fkelly-maybe you’re right, but on the surface, he seems to hate when I ask him anything. In fact, if he answers at all, it’s probably a lie. Maybe I shouldn’t always ask? One thing is for sure, I’d prefer he not answer me, than lie to my face. His lies are the only thing that can make me feel different about him…

    Bracing for the upcoming week…and Pesach.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183054
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    aries2756/fkelly-it’s interesting that teens at risk say, “Never stop asking your kid what they’re doing, who their friends are, how their doing”. My son hates these questions, and usually responds with something like, “What do you care?, “Why do you need to know?”, “Why are you so nosey”, or “It’s not your business” etc. I do usually keep giving the message that I love him, but it seems like I can never say “no” to him. Any time I have to say no, no matter how nicely I said it, or how sugar coated the words were, he gets angry and defensive.

    in reply to: Everything is great, but I'm not sure if there is chemistry! #953719
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    Participant

    Caleefornia- Sometimes when someone comes on ‘too strong’, it can feel smothering, and since you mentioned that you felt more of an attraction before he was so persistent, perhaps that could be the reason. I think you should ask yourself what it is, specifically, that you don’t like about him. And like some of the posters mentioned, how would you feel if you never saw him again? Try to gain more clarity on your doubts to help you know better if it’s just ‘cold feet’ on your part, or is there some midda about him you don’t like. Then you can ask yourself, if this is a midda you can live with….or not.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183051
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    aries2756-so, is it just a matter of time, or does it depend upon the intensity (or frequency) of the message?

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183049
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    Imaof three-“He will feel connected to you because of your love and acceptance of him, not because you buy him cigarettes.”

    This is just my point. He doesn’t feel my love for him for some reason. All the ways a child normally feels his parent’s love seem to be damaged, not bc I’m not giving the message, but bc his ‘receptors’ seem to be damaged. As much as it goes against my instincts, buying him cigarettes makes him feel that I accept him.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183048
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    Participant

    aries2756-He told me that he got this feeling from school, when the kids used to make fun of him. The chevra he’s with now makes him feel great and accepted, no matter what. Yet even though I love him, and tell him constantly, and show it constantly, it doesn’t seem to penetrate bc ‘I’m the mother and that’s why I’m saying it’.

    The kids do talk about the army, and he’s being called for an interview. Originally he wasn’t against it, and planned to go. But now he seems to be eager to continue with his learning, and doesn’t want the disruption, so who knows?

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183046
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    aries2756-thanks for taking the time to write all your sage advice. I do have a few comments, however.

    “At the very worst scenario he may never come back, again “. Unfortunately, I don’t see this as the worst case scenario. It would be a bad scenario if he never came back again, but I’m pretty worried about the scenario of getting into drugs or serious depression (he may already be there, and if not, he’s pretty close).

    “Where is the pain coming from?”. My pain is coming from watching my son give up on himself, and think so little of himself when I know how great he is! He is the baby eagle that fell into a den of ducklings. He may quack like a duck, and waddle like a duck, but my baby eagle can fly! Of course it has to do with his suffering, what do I care about me anymore? He told me that he’s stupid, ugly and boring. If it wasn’t so pitiful, I’d actually laugh at the absurdity of it. The most painful thing is, and I can’t shake it, is that I CAN’T HELP HIM. Not just specifically ‘me’, but I can’t even get him help from anyone else bc he won’t accept it (and that’s if I could even find someone professional, with the experience to help him). And yet, believe it or not, when I asked my son today if there’s anyone in this world that he trusts, he said yes…..me! But I challenged him, and told him that if that were true, why doesn’t he accept what I say? Why doesn’t he believe how great he is? And he said bc he doesn’t feel it. So I practically begged him to let me help him with this. I begged him to go talk to someone about this, but he just said that no one can help him. Yes, my family and I are suffering, but it has nothing to do with the neighbors! I don’t even notice they exist. My world is a blurr, somewhere in the background Pesach is looming, and my kids are calling me and asking me questions I don’t hear. I know I have to pick myself up, or I may end up drowning with my son. I have people to talk to, but I still have to face my pain alone. As much as I have to force myself to function in the ‘real’ world, I can’t help but relate to Lot’s wife, who turned around to look back to see if her child was behind her…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183043
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    Imaofthree-I never used to buy him cigarettes, and even now that things are so tight financially, I usually don’t. But in a sick sort of way, if I don’t ‘give’ him anything, then what will ever make him feel connected to his parents again? He seems to reject everything I offer him. In my opinion, kids only develop a love for their parents bc we constantly give to them. Well now, for some reason, my son won’t accept most things from me. Food, which is such a nurturing thing, he completely rejects. The WHOLE Shabbos, he ate nothing but junk food. So yes, every once in a while, I’ll buy him cigarettes, and hope that one day, he’ll have the sense to quit. But in the meantime, I’m trying to re-establish the connection with him, hoping that one day, me and my husband will become important to him again…

    My husband is going to make some inquiries for a possible job for him. And you’re right, Baruch Hashem he is alive and healthy, and I am thankful for that.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183041
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    So, I took my son to the bus station, and was extra pained bc for some reason, he wouldn’t accept anything from me. Usually I give him snacks and stuff, but he refused everything except money and cigarettes. I even baked him a cake, which he wouldn’t take. So as I walked away with tears in my eyes, I couldn’t help but think that this beloved son is my korban. And just like Avraham Avinu, who was willing to sacrifice his son, he still had tears in his eyes during the Akeida, I felt entitled to my tears as I walked away, even though I wanted to just hug him and not let go…

    “But Hashem, you gave Avraham Avinu back his son….won’t You… please…..give me back my son too?”

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183039
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    Shavuah Tov!

    a mamin-thank-you!

    aries2756-my son took a ‘vacation’ from school for 2 weeks! They did call him, and I was sure they weren’t happy about it. But for some reason, everything is back to ‘normal’, and he has 1 more week before Pesach.

    Imaofthree-you are right that there are some jobs he could get. But unfortunately, he has no self confidence to look for one. If someone in the chevra does not get him a job and work with him, he won’t even try.

    I am falling into a sort of nostalgic depression, since it was this time of year, last year, that he started to fall. I can’t believe it’s been almost a year already. And I kept thinking back then, he’ll ‘come back’ any day, any day…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183033
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    Of course, anyone posting here should be respectful to all the other posters. And truthfully, I think the mods should edit anything nasty or inappropriate. We should ‘speak’ to eachother with the same derech eretz we’d give, as if we were standing in the same room with eachother. And for the most part, I think we have. There were only a few posters that I remember who were accusatory and attacked unnecessarily.

    Well, this Shabbos, we hardly saw my son at all. He didn’t come to any seuda, and seemed kind of angry when he was awake, otherwise he just slept. One more week, and then he’s on vacation. I just don’t know how we are going to manage…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183022
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    aries2756/Syag Lchochma/a mamin-I am so sorry for the misunderstandings that are happening here on this thread. I consider you all my good ‘friends’, who have helped me so much, that I would hate to think you got hurt by eachother, in a sense, bc of me. As much as this thread was a great way for me to connect and get support, there’s always the risk that someone’s words could be misconstrued, misinterpreted or heard in a tone of voice that was not intended. It has happened to me with emails, where an exclamation point intended to show excitement was read as anger. aries2756, I am positive that you are a devoted daughter to your parents, and a great source of nachas. I can tell by how much you have helped me, that you are a person of chesed, who goes out of her way to give. This is the image, I think, we all have of you. I am not the only one who has benefited from your insight and wise words. And I know that I would not have managed so well if you hadn’t peeked into the CR and joined this thread when you did. I hope you and everyone else will continue posting, and we should all try to give eachother kaf zchus bc really, everyone here is important and has offered invaluable advice…

    Emunah613-thank-you!

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183010
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    crgo-wow! Thanks for your heartfelt post, I can relate to everything you said. (I do remember when you posted before). I’ve also agonized about making the right decision on where to live, but I believe that nisayonos are Heaven sent, and they will ‘find’ you wherever you live. I think I would also be more fearful of my kids going OTD in NY than in Israel, where at least here they live mostly with other Jews, in a place of kedusha, with perhaps a better chance of returning to their roots(?). While there may be more organizations that deal with OTD kids in NY, and perhaps more professional staff, there’s also much more temptation over there, and anyway, the shlichim are Heaven sent. So, I would rather stay here and daven, where I feel Hashem’s presence that much more, than return to NY and be tricked into thinking that my efforts will make the difference. I pray every day that Hashem will send the right shaliach to help bring my son back to Torah and mitzvos.

    You are right that certain approaches may be too ‘American minded’, and wouldn’t work over here. There’s a different set of rules in Israel, spoken and unspoken. That’s all part of my frustration, since I still have my American mentality, although I’ve been here many years and have had to adapt to a different way of thinking.

    Thanks for all the (undeserved) compliments, if only I could live up to the image you have of me, perhaps I wouldn’t feel so guilty. In any case, ‘from your words to my son’s ears’, may he find a place in his heart to welcome back his parents…and Hashem.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183008
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    EH-thanks for the recommendation, I will try to listen while I clean for Pesach……….

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183007
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    Imaofthree-yes, I did find someone to speak with, and also have a few friends that I confide in, Baruch Hashem. You are right, the anger and sadness is emotional energy better spent on positive things, including my other children. Now with Pesach coming, there’s no time to be upset!

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183003
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    DUNO-I agree with you that any ‘thinking person’ SHOULD have sympathy for a child OTD. But how many ‘thinking’ people are there??

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183002
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    EH-you are right. My ‘knee jerk’ reaction was purely emotional, and I know it will not help my child. However, it is from these emotions that I get the push to advocate srongly for my child. Unfortunately, I don’t think most hanhala are going to be receptive to concerns about ‘pushing my son over the brink”, as much as they are going to be concerned with the reputation of their yeshiva. Perhaps only a kiruv yeshiva would have this sensitivity. Anyway, we are still looking and still davening, and b’ezrat Hashem, he will go to the yeshiva that Hashem has chosen for him.

    zahavasdad/a mamin-I thought about moving many times, but I’m not sure it would be any different in another religious community.

    I am worried that me speaking about his could be seen as lashon hara about Israel, chas v’Shalom. But I think the communities here in Israel tend to be more homogenous, either pretty religious, or pretty secular. And unfortunately, both groups seem to have much fear and little understanding about the other. The secular are fearful of their kids becoming religious, and the religious are fearful of their kids becoming secular. It is for this reason there seems to be so many walls and little acceptance. As much as it hurts me that (some) people here are distant, I can understand it…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182996
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    aries2756-Believe me aries2756, I was livid when my son told me this. I was full of anger, and I wanted my husband to call the Rav immediately, and challenge him as to why my son was rejected. But my husband refused, knowing that the Rav would only defend himself, and offer some flimsy excuse for the rejection. Yet I still wanted my husband to call, just to let this Rav know that what he did was disgusting and hurtful to an innocent child, to hold up a mirror to this Rav’s face and show him who he is, and let him know that he erred gravely and obviously. But my husband said that this Rav will not feel the intended regret and embarrasment, and we will be the ones feeling worse off.

    You are right aries! This Rav, if he were really on Hashem’s derech, should have realized the pivotal role he could have in pushing my son away, and should have bent over backwards to be mekarev my son, or AT LEAST, given him a fair chance at being accepted, instead of the obvious, discriminating rejection. This is the same son who, if you remember, was hit at the park by a Haredi man. Do people even realize the damage they are doing to kids??? And Avi, if you are reading this, here’s a perfect example of the exact kinds of things that could push kids away from the derech, and it has nothing to do with the parents!

    You know, people talk about kids going OTD from so many reasons, but I think it’s stuff like this that’s at the core, Hashem yirachem…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182994
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    Syag Lchochma-I am so sorry for your suffering. You are right, the yetzer hara would like nothing more than to create safek in the hearts of all Jews, and to create machlokes and destroy our emunah. My husband always says that no one is perfect, so why do I expect perfection from the religious? The thing is, I do hold the religious to a higher standard, bc we should know better. Especially if the consequences of the mistake will hurt children, chas v’Shalom. But not everyone is on a path to improve their middos, and some people are just truly lacking…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182991
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    aries2756, Imaofthree, smc-my husband does not want to confront this Rav bc he feels that it would put him on the defensive, and would close doors.

    My second son was not applying to the same yeshiva my first son went to (I would never even consider it). It was a different yeshiva, however one of the Rabbis who used to teach in my other son’s yeshiva, now moved to this yeshiva. Anyway it wouldn’t matter. My OTD son is openly OTD, and almost everyone knows it. It’s just very disgusting that they didn’t even give my son a chance. When the boys came in and sat down with the Rav, he looked at all the names. He recognized my son’s last last name, and asked if he was the brother of my other son. He didn’t even have the sense to hide his prejudice!!! I can’t really believe that there are people like this in our Torah world. It is enough to shake a person’s emunah…….

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182990
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    Syag Lchochma-you made me laugh! So nice of you to invite me to your neighborhood. Perhaps there is more acceptance in NY than there is over here. In general, most religious neighborhoods do not react sympathetically to families going through this, there is much fear and I don’t think anyone really looks at a kid OTD with sympathy, knowing that they are suffering. I know that you are right about Hashem’s derech, and I will try to remember your words the next time I am confronted with prejudice or insensitivity.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182989
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    crisisoftheweek-I’m really hoping you’re wrong, and that it will get better rather than worse..

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182982
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    mom12-I am really sad to hear about your other son quitting yeshiva, and I hope you can get him into a good place that will be mekarev him, and reach his heart.

    From all the looks we’ve been getting from neighbors, from the really insensitive comments we’ve heard from people lately (friends too, believe it or not!), and from all the stress my other son is going through trying to get accepted into a yeshiva, when no one seems to be giving him a fair chance, I am close to going off the derech myself..

    smc-thanks for your suggestion, but I am really losing hope..

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182981
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    a mamin-thanks for your optimism,I need it.

    Here’s another bit of interesting grief. My other son has been interviewing for yeshivas for next year. He recently interviewed with a group of boys, by a Rav who happened to have taught my other son years ago, before he went OTD (he now knows about it, however). My son came home from the interview quite upset, bc he said the Rav asked everyone a bunch of questions, and asked him only one. I tried to encourage my son by saying, maybe he already knows how smart you are bc of your brother (who really excelled in those years). Unfortunately, the opposite is true. I’m sure it’s bc my son is now OTD, that he rejected my other son. He didn’t even give him a chance….

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182977
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    a mamin-amen! I pray that there will be light at the end of this tunnel, and that I will be zoche to see it…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182975
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    He’s back to his old shenanigans, staying out all night. I have no faith in the system over here. The kiruv people involved are sleeping! They don’t answer any calls, they just stand idly by while my son falls further. May Hashem help us…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182972
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    superme-thanks, but there are other organizations that deal more specifically with this issue. But I’ll just say that NY definitely has the upper hand with professionals experienced in working with kids/parents OTD. So far, the best guidance I’ve had has been from aries2756 (as well as other various posters) and Avi Fishoff. And I know NY has many more who work in this field! Here, it’s much more limited and unfortunately, not as professional (in my opinion).

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182971
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    aries2756-I’m not so sure my son celebrated Purim bc he feels connected to yiddishkeit, although he did fast on Taanis Esther. I figured he just wanted to party with the chevra, and here was an ‘acceptable’ way to do it. But you’re right, I probably shouldn’t ask any questions.

    I’m not too optimistic about him helping us get ready for Pesach. If he just doesn’t make my home into a war zone, I’ll be happy. And unfortunately, he did not go back to school. Don’t know why exactly, and I can’t ask too many questions ’cause he doesn’t answer them. The only thing I know is that this time they called him. (Don’t know what they said, but….)

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182970
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    zahavasdad-you are right. I guess the customs of Purim fit right in to their hashkafa!

    EH-He’s always been the kind of kid who only does what he wants. Why do you think we are giving him everything he desires? If you ask him, he’ll tell you that we give him nothing, ’cause that’s how he feels. And the truth is, we are unfortunately, on a very tight budget, but not moreso with him than with our other kids.

    I do daven for all the other kids who are OTD, and their parents. It’s a sad thing, but just off the top of my head, I can name at least 26 kids in our neighborhood, and I’m sure there are many more.. Thanks for reminding me that I have to be a mom to my other children…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182964
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    superme-I don’t see any reason to call Aish, since they don’t do outreach that I know of, and my son wouldn’t accept help from them (or anyone else) even if they did…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182961
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    Well….what can I say? What used to be my favorite holiday ever since we moved to Israel, is now a day for tapered smiles and worry. While my son was making all these plans to go to secular parties and places, I asked him why, when he has clearly rejected a Torah way of life and anything Rabbis say, he was celebrating Purim at all, which is d’Rabanan? Of course he gave the answer, which is the answer to almost any question I ask, “‘Cause I want”. I had to constantly remind myself what I heard from a friend, who told me that no matter what my son does/where he goes on Purim, I WILL be happy, bc it’s a chance to do a mitzvah completely l’shem Shamayim. I’m not acting happy bc I necessarily feel it, but only bc it’s what Hashem wants. So, I did my best, and am now trying to prepare for the weeks he will be home before Pesach…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182959
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    Participant

    a mamin- Amen! From midnight until about 3am, I begged Hashem to save my son (except for the hour when I fell asleep). I pray that Hashem will bring yeshuas to all of Am Yisrael…we all need them!

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182957
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    Participant

    What a nisayon, to be b’simcha while my son, with his chevra, give us nothing but grief…

    in reply to: Special Day for Tefilla�Ta'anis Esther or Purim? #1143526
    write or wrong
    Participant

    In addition to the segula of praying to Hashem after Chatzot, the night of Purim, there is also a segulah to get up early on the morning of Taanis Esther and say perek 22 of Tehillim 7 times before Alot Hashachar. After each time you say the perek, you make a bakasha, then say the tehillim again, bakasha again until you’ve said it 7 times. You do this after lighting a yartzeit candle l’kavod Mordechai HaTsaddik and one for Esther HaMalka. It is a sha-at ratzon, and can cancel all harsh decrees. Also, make a promise to Hashem that if He gives you a yeshuah, you will publicize it…similar to Esther.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182955
    write or wrong
    Participant

    First time caller-thank you so much for your inspirational story, and may Hashem continue to send you yeshuas!

    I was told by a friend of mine, and I’ve heard it said in shiurim, that there is tremendous power on the day of Purim. While we are usually pretty busy with sending mishloach manos and the Purim seuda, the truth is, we should be spending a bulk of the day davening. In fact, I was told that beginning Chatzot Lyla Motsei Shabbos, for the next 6 hours, all 7 gates of Shamayim are open, and we should spend that time pouring our hearts out to Hashem.

    I’m so happy that you were able to see success in the merit of all your tefillah. I hope and pray that we will all merit to see nissim and yeshuot this Purim, and that all of our lost children will find their way back to Torah, to mitsvos, and to us….

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182951
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    Participant

    TPO-I appreciate your tefillah, thanks…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182946
    write or wrong
    Participant

    superme-interjection was only concerned for your safety. Even though your intentions were to daven for my son (which I appreciate!), by ‘just’ exchanging emails and names, it’s a kind of ‘connecting’ outside the coffee room…. 🙂

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