MAILBAG: Open Letter To The Older Singles Of Klal Yisroel And Their Families


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I’d like to express some thoughts about your plight – or better – our plight. I’m not writing on behalf of many people, but I’m sure these ideas are shared by many many members of our nation. (Therefore, I’ll write “we” as I continue.)

Firstly, we want you to know that all of Klal Yisroel are with you in this nisayon. It’s very possible that some of us can be doing more on your behalf, but you must know that many of us are doing all we can to try to help bring you to the simcha that you so rightfully deserve. We daven constantly for your hatzlocha, that Hashem should give you strength, clarity of emuna, and encouragement to forge on. We cry and beg Hashem to bring the yeshua for each one of you. Please know that Klal Yisroel feels your pain and struggle, and is trying to be Noseh B’ol with you.

Secondly, we want you to understand that this nisayon is part of the Acharis H’yomim, the Chevlay Mashiach. Your pain and struggle in emuna are part of what will usher in the Y’mos Hamoshiach. Hashem has chosen you specifically to be tested, because He knows that you can rise to the challenge and grow closer to Him, becoming greater people. Each one of you will end up being a head taller than those around you. Please be strong in your emunah and your determination to grow. Continue to turn to Him and daven with all your hearts until Hashem brings each of you the zivug that is yours min hashamayim.

Let’s all daven for the coming of mashiach, when Hashem will reveal His malchus. Then we will see how all the nisyonos and all the pain that you are suffering has filled up the cup to bring the geula. On that day, all of you will be our heroes who stood steadfast in emuna b’Hashem and we will all be zoche to experience together ‘V’haya bayom hahoo, y’hyeh Hashem echod ooshmo echod”.

May we all be zoche to a shana tova u’mesuka, a shnas geula and yeshua for each one of us and for all of us together as the Am Hashem.

Name withheld upon request

NOTE: The views expressed here are those of the authors and do not necessarily represent or reflect the views of YWN.


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  1. Very nice wish, which should also come true for the writer.
    Mir sollen alles guts ausbeten, a gut suss gebentschten gesunten neuen yahr. We should pray for all the best, a good sweet blessed healthy new year.

  2. While I think the author of this article is well meaning, it does come across as very condescending.
    The last thing anyone, single or married, wants to hear is a lecture from someone not going through whatever trial or tribulation this is person is, that it’s all for the best, that it’s Hashem’s plan, it will hasten the coming of the Moshiach, etc…

  3. The day after my first meeting with a young lady from Bais Yaakov, forty-plus years ago, I told the shadchun I’d be interested in seeing her again. She, however, was not interested in seeing me. Devastation! A yungerman in the kollel of that yeshiva told me to make a l’chayim and thank HaShem for a y’shua! She wasn’t right for me, obviously, and I was being saved from myself! What an eye-opener! After that first p’gisha, I just floated without a care all the while other p’gishos were being arranged for me by the yeshiva yungerleit. So, to older singles, I say, “Make a l’chayim and thank HaShem for saving you from a calamity.”