The Chazon Ish is said to have remarked, “If you tell me that a Talmid Chochom commited an Aveira of Arayos with an Eshes Ish, I would believe it. All people are subject to strong Yitzrei ha’Ra sometimes. But if you tell me that a Talmid Chochom has bad Midos, then I would not believe it; one who learns Torah properly must be affected such that he has good Midos.” Your friends husband may very well be a fine, upstanding, frum fellow – who did not manage to stand up to a Nisayon. This can be rectified for the future by using the proper filters and programs etc. (if removal of internet from the the house is not an option). As a Rebbi of mine said, “Yichud with the internet is Asur!” Certainly she can and should seek professional help for overcoming this Nisayon of her own with the right attitude. But she should first and foremost understand that her husband is not really some “monster” whom she never really knew. He is whom he always was, and he probably needs her support now more than ever.

I am close with a world-renowned gastroenterologist (Dr. Julian Paz, from Har Nof), and he has told me that he recommends this surgery over any other option.

I Daven for him, and think of him, often. I also think of the poor boy who threw the bat. He must be guilt-ridden. Is he getting the help that he needs also?

A wise man spoke at his son’s Sheva Berachos. He said, “Son, now that you’re married, it’s time to learn the fine art of compromise. Let me give you an example. Let’s say that it’s time to paint the kitchen. Your wife wants to paint it pink, but you prefer white. So you compromise – you paint it pink!”

I thought of a good Mashal over Shabbos. Imagine that a group of people are standing on the edge of a cliff. One of them is a powerful bodybuilder, who manages to grab onto the edge and prevent himself from falling down. You are one of a number of others who grab onto him and cling for dear life. He is holding himself and the rest above the gorge, using his strength to prevent everyone from falling to certain death below. He is certainly in some distress, straining his muscles to the extreme. How long do you hold on?

Wow – I know a lot of stories that would fit right into this thread. Here’s one now. A friend of mine’s car broke down in the middle of a date. A date that had not gone well; they both knew that it was over. He called AAA, and they sent a tow truck. The driver was a VERY large – as in well over 300 pounds large – and jolly man. Well, he chuckled, there was nothing that he could do for the car. As it was at night, and in a pretty bad area, he did offer them a ride back. Feeling that they had no choice, they accepted. The tow truck had three seats – all in the cab. The driver took up most of them. And so they squeezed in, while maintaining distance as much as they could. The driver was a in grand mood. “So, you Jewish?” My friend grimly and monosyllabicly answered, “Yes”. “Well, I’m not Jewish. But I am circumcised!” The driver then went on to tell the hilariously funny story of just how and with what his father had threatened the surgeon if the circumcision would go badly. By the time they pulled up in front of her house, it was very late (this was before cell phones), and her entire family was worriedly outside waiting for them. They were therefore on hand to witness them spill out of the cab like so many circus clowns.

R’ Elyashiv, R’ Chaim Kanievskey, and many other (perhaps ALL other) Gedolim Pasken that while certainly not a Chiyuv, kidney donation is not only Mutar but a tremendous Mitzvah of giving life to another. And to second what the Mod said, I have not, in my somewhat extensive research, come across any recommended lifestyle restrictions other than a prudent suggestion to refrain from contact sports lest one lose his only kidney. Exercise, drinking more, etc. I have never heard of as recommended after kidney donation – sounds like plain old general advice to me (and in the case of drinking more than one needs to quench his thirst, not necessarily good advice). The remaining kidney grows larger and does the exact same job that two once did.

As far as I know, there is no Inyan to Davka have honey per se on Rosh Hashanah. The reason to eat it is that it is so sweet, much more so than sugar. Mead, however, is not sweet (I think – am I right?). Hence, drinking mead on Rosh Hashanah is more likely to garner an alcoholic year. Or perhaps an archaic one.

From the New-Jersey Star Ledger:

“Even with diligent compliance, however, a patient on dialysis faces a shortened life span. An ordinary American, age 30-34, can expect to live 50 more years, while a patient on dialysis, of the same age, can expect to live 11 more, according to the U.S. Renal Data System.

For someone receiving a kidney transplant, the life span for that age group increases to 30 years.

“A transplant is not just life-altering, it’s truly life-saving,” says Shamkant Mulgaonkar, chief of renal and pancreas transplantation for the Saint Barnabas Health Care System. “Someone gave you extra years that no other medical treatment does. That’s life-saving.”

Question

Kidney donation: Are there long-term risks?

I’m considering kidney donation. Are there long-term risks?

Answer

from Erik P. Castle, M.D.

Research has shown that there’s little long-term risk for kidney donation, provided you’re carefully screened before becoming a donor. As a potential kidney donor, you’ll receive a thorough medical exam to determine whether you’re a good match for the potential recipient. And you’ll be carefully checked to make sure you don’t have any health problems that might be made worse by donating a kidney.

Kidney donation involves major surgery, and there are risks including bleeding and infection. After your kidney is removed (nephrectomy), you’ll spend time recovering in the hospital and at home. With time, your remaining kidney will enlarge as it takes on additional blood flow and filtration of wastes.

Your long-term survival rate, quality of life, general health status and risk of kidney failure are about the same as that for people in the general population who aren’t kidney donors. Regular checkups, including monitoring of your kidney function and blood pressure, generally are recommended to evaluate your health after kidney donation.