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RY is right, people aren’t open about anything that isn’t perfect because it might ruin their own shidduch, or their siblings or kids.
We all have to keep up the perfect plastic image so we can marry plastic perfect people and then have all the skeletons fall out of the closets on our heads when we are looking for a shirt.
SURPRISE!!! You married a human being!!!Bump
So it seems. Honestly, I was never part of the secular world, but that is what I have heard from pple who are.
Yep, orange juice is a reason to marry the guy! 😉
If the only problem is that we are not letting people get degrees, why did people leave yiddishkeit years ago when everyone just wanted ‘my son the doctor, my son the lawyer”.
many of those “professionals” were lost to yiddishkeit .The girls from such sheltered communities work in the ‘big wide world’??They work in sheltered environments, and once they get married many do not work at all, since the hashkafah is that men should support their families.
There is a stigma about mental disorders in the frum community. Right or wrong, its not considered acceptable to share such information.
The reason why therapists say that? Maybe because they know how prevelant mental disorders are, so they think everyone should tell all and break the stigma. We are years away from doing away with stigma, you don’t have to be the first to tell.Who says I like people?
Weeeell…..he is standing up for what he believes, I guess.
although I TOTALLY disagree
I think hatzoloh is an amazing organization and I have been personally impressed with their work many times when I watched them in action.BTW, I am not a good person to argue with, I am usually too busy to keep checking responses.
Health, I really admire your persistence, although I think it could be used for bigger things.
Wow, you just don’t give up standing up for what you believe in!Avi K very well said, but please notice the question was what UTLIMATELY determines……
so of course that’s hashem
there are health nuts who exercise and eat only …….. but have r’l gotten sick
there are smart, talented, hardworking pple who just cant make ends meetetc
At least he is realistic and not blaming the Israelis or the ‘settlements’.
All those llama’s work for footsteps and are implanted with a chip to hear who is a good candidate to be schlepped away from yidishkeit. Beware of llama’s.
Also llamas should be spelled with one L.
LAMA
I think we should start a petition to change the spelling.Ubiq, thanks for explaining. When you put it that way I hear where this is coming from.
I respect those who can respect and love all other jews regardless of having a different derech of serving hashem.
I happen to think that reform is not a viable option. Reform is NOT the same thing as becoming MO and wearing a blue shirt and getting an accounting degree or whatever, just examples of a viable frum life one can lead outside the yeshivish and chasidish communities.
Reform is not one degree less frum than MO. There are huge differences (some of which have been blurred by OO) but someone who leaves the frum community and joins reform might not even have Jewish children.I do think many parents would disown a child who became reform, but not one who made minor changes in their derech. And FYI I grew up chasidish, and where I grew up these minor changes would not be grounds for disowning a child. It would be grounds for the neighbors to yenta, though.
🙁Anyone from South Africa wanna weigh in here?
Health, I bet you just looked up EMD on Wikipedia.
I just read their Wikipedia page, is this so different than the communist, bundist, etc groups that lured our youth off the derech in the shtetl?
Footsteps is definitely more effective than 100 people over the last 12 years, I personally know at least 4 married women who joined, and I don’t even live in new York!
None of the women I know committed suicide, but I wouldn’t be surprised if depression was a factor.
I think we need to do some work on minimizing the stigma of mental illness in the frum community so those with depression don’t have to leave to feel accepted.For some reason I think the internet is one of the things that’s gonna go when moshiach comes.
Where are these cheap apts located, in the center of town or further out?
I think no current marriage would withstand this. I guess our concept of marriage is a new fangled thing and in the olden days it was more of a practical thing and less of a ‘soul mate’, BFF type of relationship which is espoused nowadays.
If he’s a good boy, with good middos and yiras shomayim, and he wants a similar life to the one you want, go for it. He isn’t New Square type anymore, so why is it relevant what they are like?
It would make sense to find out why and how he left, just to make sure it isn’t something that would have a negative effect on your life. In other words make sure he isn’t a anti-establishment, bitter angry guy.
Probably he’s not.How about Chabad? There’s gotta be some Chabad communities in NJ.
Jakob: not every chasidus has its own Rebbe in Lakewood. They each have their own shul (maybe) but their Rebbe isn’t necessarily moving to Lakewood.
You mean New Square, otherwise known to chasidim as Skver. It’s a town near Monsey founded and built by Skvere Chasidim, headed by the previous Skevere Rebbe o’bm.
Its like a shtetl in America, and I heard their hachnosas orchim is something special.
Its obviously a very sheltered environment, that being the point of the whole thing.Very freaky story, from a jewish perspective. Are we all really as jewish as we think we are?
Yikes!
There are many differences between Lakewood and Monsey, btw. They both have lots of traffic since the roads were not built to accommodate the population explosion. Kein Yirbu!
Come live in Yerushalayim 🙂
The reason someone would learn the alef beis has very little to do with visiting Israel and more to do with learning Torah.
We gets lotsa tourist ’round here in the holy land. Christians, Chinese, various African tribes in full regalia…….. I betcha most of them can read Hebrew at all.
The alef beis have inherent kedusha, not to mention the obvious but lashon kodesh is the language of the Torah.
Yeah, it won’t help you in getting around Europe. Can’t argue with the facts ……….
While you are at it, you may as well skip the a/c. Our grandparents managed without that too. It’ll save you a bundle.
On a more serious note, there are many ways to save money. However, the standard of living in Lakewood isn’t that way.
Correct me if I am wrong all you Lakewooders out there….
Just putting on my bullet proof vest….gimme a sec…………….Is it legal in E’Y to marry more than one wife? I have many Sephardic and Yemenite neighbors where I live and all have one wife. Unless the other one is hidden in a closet or something 😉
Cholent is a Yiddish word, so I guess you have one word already 🙂 !
While I agree that many of the Yiddish speakers today mix it with English words, it seems to be the nature of languages. They evolve with time and with a new geographical location there are bound to be changes.
Interesting to note, Yerushalmi Yiddish, which one would assume should be a more pure form of Yiddish, includes some English and Arabic words!
Chalaka is Arabic as is Jabbeh (frog).
Some examples of the British influence:
An umbrella is called a “parsol” (Parasol) and a porch is called a “balkon” (balcony).‘The easy shmeezy guide to learning Yiddish’ by Moshe Sherizen is a great book for beginners.
Look at how many amazing organizations we have in our community! Just to name a few:
Hatzoloh, Chaveirm, Chai Lifeline, RCCS, Bein Ish, Tomche Shabbos, Ezer L’yeshivos, Agudas YisroelHelp me out here and add some more!
Wow that’s amazing.
The Jewish Positive Thinking workshops are similar, and they give lots of chizzuk to have hope and joy in your yiddishkeit.Why would the Arabs protest a simple thing like a metal detector, when its well known that ALL THE JEWS VISITING THE KOSEL ARE ALSO REQUIRED TO PASS A METAL DETECTOR?
Why is that an impediment to peace?
Its the most normal thing here in Israel, they even have them in malls and shopping centers here.
The Arabs are looking for excuses to riot.I also heard that.